Blunders and Dragons

[Bonus] "That Thing We Found" Part 4/5

Blunders and Dragons LLC Season 1 Episode 6

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In Part 4 our crew returns to their home base, but not everything is as they left it....

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Kipo

What's up, my dudes? We are Blunders and Dragons, and this is episode four of our five episode mini series called That Thing We Found. To view character art, location maps, and clues, as well as other bonuses, sign up for our Patreon. If that's not for you, but you still want to support us, please like, rate, review, subscribe, and share. We have two entire campaigns, four seasons coming soon.

Wylie

This is episode four. Um, you guys, I'll just do a little summary of what happened last time. Um, last time you went and investigated the Istid Jokul research base, and you found a lot of weird stuff. Um, and some strange things happened, and then you finally headed back to your own base safely without any combat. Really strange.

Everyone

So um board and rang show effect. He's just being very passive. Everybody's friendly. Yeah, Garns. Everyone. Yeah, even Jerry.

Mimir

Everybody's family.

Brad

Even Jimmy.

Mimir

And Buddy. Buddy. Yeah, buddy. Yeah Buddy.

Wylie

So, in the midst of uh investigating the research base, you found out that for their food, instead of having a biosphere with a garden and chickens and stuff like you guys have, they actually burrowed down into the earth and found um they they found mushrooms and root vegetables and all these kind of cool stuff in the cavern down there. And so Jerry was an interesting mushroom creature that Gordon immediately befriended. Um and then you guys actually did find the rest of the staff down there too. But everything was a bit weird.

Brad

Minus what's his name? Argo. Yeah, aggro. Yeah.

Jared

So there was a little nice one.

Wylie

So there was a little gnome, a little gnome lady, and um six Duergar dwarves um with her as well. And you guys definitely felt uncomfortable about them. Um, but you left. And so you got outside, uh, Jerry freaked out because of the cold. You guys murdered Jerry.

Mimir

No, uh no, because didn't he grow back legs and stuff?

Wylie

Yeah, his legs did keep moving. So there was many parts of Jerry, I guess, by the time that you left. So you don't know if he lived or died, but you did leave him out in the negative 30 cold, which he did not seem to like.

Jared

Yeah. I yeah. He just we couldn't afford him on Payroll.

Wylie

So So now you guys are racing back against the storm um to make it to your base, um, to your own Arctic research base. Um, what clues are you bringing back with you, do you remember?

Mimir

I draw my pen.

Wylie

You did get a very cool knife.

Jared

I did, I got a sword.

Wylie

Mm-hmm.

Jared

Or a knife, fire knife.

Wylie

The steampunk monarch dragon blade. So that's it. And I did send you the stats for that.

Jared

Ooh, statsy. I shared it with you. Should I read that LM?

Wylie

You can if you want. I think I don't remember what I put in there.

Mimir

Oh. Let's see if I can find it here. We got tentacle legs.

Kipo

Alan got some whiskey.

Wylie

That was not a clue. That was just from Pyra.

Mimir

Yeah. Feels like a clue to you. You're like, maybe if I drink more, then I'll Oh, wait a minute.

Kipo

I'm starting to see things very clearly. I'm like, I'm on to something.

Wylie

Selen got pretty sprightly after having some fire whiskey. Um so Gor Gordon did find some frozen tentacles and mushroom caps in the freezer, which you had in plastic bags.

Brad

And um I kept one and I don't remember which one I kept.

Wylie

I think you still have the top. Did you keep the tops? I think you saw the tops. So you pulled out one. So you have one whizlock bag with um some mushroom tops in it. You had opened the one that had octopus tentacles in it, dumped it out, stuck Jerry in that whizlock bag, and you definitely busted. Jerry busted right out of that.

Mimir

Yeah, that was not even these blocks are not or whizlock bags are uh Wizlocks are not too sturdy.

Brad

It's the off-brand. The brand.

Jared

So I got a uh Monarch, the Monarch Steampunk Dragon Blade. It's rare. Uh requires attunement. So on our way back, I'll attune to it. Uh it's plus one to damage uh attacks uh uh damage and attack rolls. Uh gives me 1d4 piercing. What? What it leave Hey, what hey, what's going on over there, Chief?

Brad

I just have this image of is it Jared, right? Yeah. Is literally trying to just pierce steer the dogs and just like winging the blade around, you know, all

Mimir

three seconds and I drop it, and then I'm like, alright, I break we're gonna stop. Um it has one d4 piercing and one d6 uh fire damage. Uh finesse uh light and thrown. Uh the knife has one charge. Uh when you hit a creature with an attack using this weapon, you can expend one charge to deal an additional two d6 fire damage to the target. Roll a d6 to regain breath and restore uh restore a charge on a five or six.

Wylie

So it's similar to how a dragon's uh breath power restore restores.

Mimir

Yeah, yeah. It's cool.

Wylie

Yeah.

Mimir

Cool, cool, cool. I'm ready to kill people.

Wylie

That is a homebrew uh nice magic item. Uh the name Monarch Steampunk Dragon is a real knife. So I did find that on the internet.

Mimir

Dope, dope, dope.

Wylie

Cool, cool, cool. So you found a knife, but that wasn't really a clue.

Mimir

Um I feel like the we're getting a lot of sass from our DM this morning.

Brad

I feel like Jared thinks it's a clue, though. Yeah, yeah.

Mimir

He's like, this this is everything.

Wylie

Uh okay, we you you did where do you remember where you found it?

Jared

Yes. Uh there was an ankle bone next to it. I know that.

Wylie

Not next to it.

Mimir

Oh, yeah.

Wylie

So there was a it's good, it's good for going over the clues.

Jared

I'm just not gonna understand, like, what is happening? Here are we?

Wylie

Your guys' investigation skills were so strong last time. Like, Gordon was crazy with the whole like, why is who I don't even remember who it was. The wrong the wrong chef with the original.

Brad

Yeah that was so she had said that muddy was the chef, and then she was like, Stanky's gonna go uh yes.

Wylie

Yeah. So you you definitely caught some weird things going on with our gnomes and our dwarves. So the um you found that blade in the ice research room. So it's a research room with a thermostat control where they could freeze it or heat it, and there was a large frozen block in there um that was kind of greenish and cut down the center, and it kind of looked like someone had been removed because there was a remaining boot with a f a foot and an ankle bone sticking out of it. Um the gnome did mention to you what that was.

Mimir

Yes, that was uh a gelatinous cue. A gelatinous cube that they were experimenting on.

Wylie

And they had frozen it and um they found that it was more stable when frozen, that they could handle it a little bit better. Um so the other clues that you found, you found a really interesting journal. The research journal had interesting pictures of the mushrooms in it, as well as if you look closely, it has um a sketch of the gelatinous cube in there.

Mimir

That's like the most important thing.

Wylie

And it has um some notes, some research notes that you weren't really able to decipher because they were both in the Duergar language as well as being like shorthand research notes. So um, you're gonna take it back and see if Java can interpret it for you. Um there was also some really interesting sketches of some mushroom creatures, which is essentially what you found, some as at least some of them.

Mimir

They looked like ill illifid uh mushroom based.

Wylie

Jellyfish mushrooms. Um when you were up in the base, you found a lot of this weird fuchsia jelly, the color of fireweed jelly. And and one of the really cold rooms where the jelly had frozen, you found these tentacle-like tracks um that were bigger than Jerry's. You know, bigger than Jerry would have made. Um, you also found this holocoaster, which kind of looks like a wooden coaster with these awesome glowing um Arctic runes, and the equipment to um project the data from the holocoaster was not working because of the cold and the damage, but you're gonna take that back to your base. And then um one of the labs was covered in acid. There was acid everywhere, yeah, a lot of acid burns. Um, and in general, there was a lot of chaos throughout the entire base. There was a lot of upturned beds and and all that kind of stuff, and you didn't actually get any clear answers uh as to why.

Mimir

I understand why uh Momir is very confused. It's because I Jared is also very confused, but then I think we talked about it and we think that the dog is infected with some kind of parasite of some sort. I think that's what we came to the conclusion. And so now, as we're rushing back, I'm thinking, oh, all the clues that we found, we're gonna have to talk to a specific person, and everybody's gonna be infected. And then there's a radiation leak. Oh, we're doomed, guys. That's why it that's why I put it out of my memory, because how bad we did.

Wylie

Right, go going back to episode one, you did have a a strange duergar come flying to your base who was shooting uh lightning bolts at a dog. The dog seemed friendly, the dog was let in and put in the kennels. Um, you quickly left with your other dog, so it hasn't been hanging out with your other dogs.

Brad

Um which Alan also just utterly destroyed the Duergar. Yeah.

Wylie

Alan took out that Duergar. He fell hard and fast to he ground

Brad

That's right.

Wylie

Jared Jared Made sure Alan did not feel guilty about that. Um and so the Duergar body was left um, I think, tied up in your um storage closet um office. Yes.

Mimir

And now my office in quotation marks.

Wylie

And uh the other NPCs left behind were JavaScript, um, who was working in the research lab, Bo Jangles, who was working on fixing that heater so that you wouldn't get any more um Arcanian sickness. And Gnar Kolepsy who was keeping lookout and the lookout towers when you guys left.

Mimir

I have so much trust in Nar. He doesn't do anything. I fill out all of his reports.

Wylie

All right. So you guys have had an hour of riding behind the dog sleds on the way back with Pyra, our demolitions expert who accompanied you, and you have returned to um the cryozyte research base.

Mimir

Sweep.

Wylie

And before the storm. Before the storm. You've beat the storm. You have about you know, roughly an hour, 30 minutes, like 30 minutes would be on the safe side before the storm hits, according to last um last estimates. So as you pull up, the rooms, the buildings that are, you know, m at the front of the base are the mud room entrance, the dog kennels, and the rec room.

Mimir

Cool. Is anybody out here to greet us? No one's outside. Oh, great. I'm so glad we're following procedure. Um I will uh uh we'll we'll lock uh uh go into the mud room, I think is the uh open the door to the mud room. Makes sense.

Jared

We're like I will back everybody.

Wylie

Um do you say that in your walkie-talkie?

Mimir

Oh, yeah, I do. Yeah, I don't just yell at I go.

Jared

Uh this is uh Commander uh Jared Vern Squirrel. Uh we are back from the research station and we have a 20 on our essay in 87 and code 5389. No one understands that besides me. Because I'm the only one that reads things.

Gordon

Did did you say you needed to go number two?

Jared

No. Uh yeah, walk into the mud room. Oh, it's muddy as always. Literally.

Speaker 11

Yeah, literally a mud.

Jared

It's just a bunch of coats and things and mud and stuff like that.

Wylie

Yeah, this is a room for those of you who don't live in Alaska. Yeah. This is a room that's usually at the entrance where you hang your coats, put your boots, um, and sometimes store extra gear and equipment. And uh because AI made this one, it literally has mud all over the floor. They don't usually have that. So it's perfect. So like um, so you do have all your dogs, so are you gonna leave the dogs out front?

Jared

Or I'll I'll start hitching them in.

Wylie

Okay, so you can just bring them into the mud room or into the kennels?

Jared

Into the kennels.

Wylie

Okay. So let's look.

Jared

I'm just gonna act like everything is normal because uh I am assuming that you know we followed procedures if an emergency went off and that that that there would be alarms and things like that. And so I'm also gonna go uh because we had a suspicion about Finn. Is Finn there?

Wylie

Yes. So I'm gonna put him, he's not in the kennels right now, but I'm gonna put him in. So Finn was the name of the dog um on his collar, and I'm gonna assume that you he was put in one of these kennels up here, not the big group kennel.

Jared

There's four kennels on the side just describing the math.

Wylie

Yeah, there's four little kennels there's four little kennels that are separate, and then there's a big um open area because the dogs like to hang out, and it's it's like a big giant dog gie play pen.

Mimir

Yeah.

Wylie

So um Finn is in one of the little ones up there, and you put the rest of the dogs, I assume, in the big kennel. Yeah. And um Nar would usually be helping you with this, but he was not around. Yeah. I mean, you guys haven't really left the base that much since arriving or for a very long period of time. Um, so you you're are you gonna go in and see check out Finn? Are you guys gonna leave? What are you gonna do?

Jared

Yeah, I'm gonna be like, What do you guys think we should do? I think there's a couple situations here. We could be attacked from them because they kind of were a little you know suspicious. Um honestly, you know, I think we should try to check out this dog. This jelly. I honestly there's nothing about this in the handbook, so I'm really at at a loss. Oh, here, you can take the journal and I'll hand the journal to you. Uh and I'll be like, um, Alan, can you go and check this out maybe and see if there's anything about that?

Alan

Yeah, I can I can read through that. Um, I think maybe just in case we could have somebody watching where we just came from, just in case they were following us. I think that would be a good idea. Okay.

Jared

Um okay,

Gordon

I'll I'll go take a look.

Jared

Oh, I mean, I could get Nar on it. Literally, that's his job. I don't think unless you want to be promoted. There is I could fire Nar. No, no.

Gordon

Oh, actually, can I get paid in spice though? We

Jared

I need a volunteer right now.

Gordon

Oh no, no payment, okay. Yeah. Never mind. I'm good.

Wylie

Plus Gordon would think anybody that arrives is his family.

Gordon

So Oh, come on in.

Alan

Is um Finn acting normally?

Wylie

Yeah, you could go up and look at him and you can do an investigation check or I would like to do it in investigation check. Or nature, whichever's better.

Alan

Yep. Uh investigation, please.

Jared

Uh I would say he's doing that all radio and I'll be like, Nar, you got copy? Uh Nar.

Alan

14.

Wylie

14. Um, yeah. He he looks up at you, wags his tail, he looks cool. Happy to see you. He seems very happy to be inside in a nice warm place. Seems like a pretty normal sled dog.

Jared

He's liking the heat. That's the first suspicious thing. Me very much liking the heat.

Wylie

He's in fact to be fair, your dogs have been out in the cold for a couple hours now. Uh-huh. And like negative therapy, and they're also happy in a nice warm kennel.

Alan

Um Alan is gonna turn to Gordon. And he's gonna he's gonna say uh hey go hey Gordon, um can can I see that baggie that you that you grabbed from the fridge?

Gordon

It's like, oh, okay, we want to see the mushroom. Yeah. Uh so yeah, Gordon. I think I think he had a pouch or something that he put it in.

Wylie

Yeah. Oh, are you wearing still the foraging basket?

Jared

I mean, I would assume he may have taken it off and put it like in the like riding in the can or in the uh dog sled.

Wylie

Maybe he put it like Okay, but you would have put both your Wislock bags in the foraging basket? So or what would have stayed in your pocket?

Jared

The remember, because one of them I did put in the foraging. So I guess the I guess the other one would have been in my pocket. So I'll pull it out of my pocket.

Wylie

So you pull it out. So it was initially frozen when you put it in your pocket, and it's now warm.

Jared

Initially frozen's not a great sign.

Wylie

And so when you pull it out, um, you can see that these mushroom heads have sprouted tentacles. Dang it.

Gordon

Oh no. It looks like Jetty. And I throw the bag at Alan.

Wylie

Alan in the kennel?

Alan

And I'm I'm uh it's still in the bag. It's still in the bag. Okay. It seems to be contained.

Wylie

It seems to be contained right now.

Alan

Okay.

Wylie

Um if you remember, Jerry did bust out of one of those bags.

Alan

Alan is going to quickly grab it and just kind of hold it up to Finn. And like let oh, can you sniff this? That kind of thing.

Wylie

Finn starts growling.

Alan

Growling. He doesn't. Okay, alright. Good sign, good sign. Right. Good sign.

Jared

We'd love to hear that.

Alan

Um he suggests to throw it, throw the bag outside. Where it's cold.

Gordon

Yes.

Alan

Um. But didn't it get angry? If it when else I just want it to stop growing live. Yes. I just want it to stop being a lot. Do we have a freezer?

Wylie

Yeah, I'm sure you do. In the Kitchen and you definitely have a freezer.

Jared

We could just put it in the freezer and then do run experiments on if we can do it.

Alan

You know what? Let's go to the lab. Yeah.

Wylie

Outside is much colder than the freezer because it needs negative 30.

Alan

So I think it'd be best to put it in a container, like a locked container, and then freeze it. Because a Ziploc bag is not gonna do anything.

Wylie

A whizlock bag.

Alan

Wizlock bag. Sorry.

Gordon

I have an idea of if there is like a bucket of water. Just throw it in the bucket of water. Oh, that's there is like a lid put on it and then put it outside. Oh, and release.

Alan

That's a really good idea. Yeah, that is great. I don't know.

unknown

Yeah.

Jared

He's the chef. He knows he has known my intelligence may be 17, but this guy, he's got it when it comes to food. Um I'm gonna uh there's no radio back, right?

Wylie

Yeah, no one, no one has responded yet. Which is not it's not necessarily abnormal. It's because you went into code speak. So 100%.

Speaker 13

Yeah.

Wylie

So uh like someone may have greeted you, but then you s you really kept going. So they might have like been like, okay.

Alan

Alan looks for his radio and realizes he never took it. It's still in the lab. All right, because he was gonna call Java and hesitant.

Jared

I'll be like, Java, you gotta copy Java.

Wylie

And uh Java comes back and says, uh, yeah, boss, what's up?

Jared

Hey, you guys do that one? That's a boss. Hey, uh, have you seen Nar around or anything?

Java Script

Um I've been working in the research lab since you guys left a little while ago, so I I have a seen Gnar he hasn't come in here. h

Jared

All right. Well, we got something that's uh very interesting. Um, and so we're gonna report back. Uh I think we're gonna have a meeting in the kitchen. Um, and we'll just have a team meeting and kind of talk about everything that uh we discovered, alright? So let's start rounding people up.

Java Script

Okay, team meeting to the kitchen. Got it.

Jared

In like 10 minutes. We don't have to rush. It's not that big of a deal.

Java Script

Copy that.

Wylie

All right. So um you guys, are you gonna do anything with the school with the now mushroom squid creature, or are you gonna go to the straight to the kitchen? What are you guys gonna do?

Jared

I think you're gonna freeze it, right?

Wylie

You could do the bucket freeze situation.

Alan

I like that idea. Yeah, I think I'll do that.

Wylie

Okay, yeah, you definitely have a bucket for water here in the dog kennels because you gotta give the dogs water and stuff.

Jared

So then I'm gonna go out to the lookout tower. The the one that's the where we came from, um, and look if there's any uh people following us or anything. Okay. Um, and then also see if Nar is there.

Wylie

Okay. And Alan, are you gonna go to the research lab first or are you gonna go straight to the kitchen?

Alan

Kitchen.

Wylie

Okay. So you're going to the kitchen, you're going outside, you're going outside to the lookout tower.

Jared

Yep, we're all splitting up, DM. As good as good DD players do. Why do you ask? Are you asking that for a specific reason?

Wylie

I just I'm trying to figure out if I need to load which maps to load.

Gordon

We're all in this together, guys.

Jared

All right, now you go do this. You gotta go there. But we're safe at home. Nothing gonna happen at our house. We have we just ran a security measure where we locked all the doors, and that was successful. It wasn't just if you're tuning in just now.

Alan

Where's uh Pyra?

Wylie

Uh oh yeah, Pyra's with you guys. Um, so I think she's just gonna go to the kitchen. Okay. So so I guess she's going with Alan to the kitchen because she's like, great, some food. Nice. I like when we have team meetings with snacks.

Jared

That is a mandatory. Jared, Jared has a lot of rules, but snack meetings are very important to them.

Wylie

Okay. And because you guys are all back in the building, okay, um, please give me your Constitution Saving J role secretly, um, as well as your D100 role.

Alan

It's uh later in the day, like afternoon.

Wylie

Yeah, it you guys, well, yeah, it's it's about evening, getting close to evening, so it's gonna be nighttime soon. Um so it's gonna be dark outside, um, as well as because you guys left at about lunchtime. Been out there for a couple hours, so it it's it's mid-afternoon, getting close to evening.

Alan

Okay.

Wylie

Alright. Let's load the kitchen. Here is our kitchen. And actually, we had a lot of our characters in here from the last team meeting. Um, let me just grab our Alan character. And so uh Alan and Pyra, you guys are the first ones to get to the kitchen. Um as you enter, you can see Kolepsy K um from the from behind. He's standing in the kitchen, he's holding a knife, he's not looking at you, his back is to you, and he seems to just be standing in the center of the kitchen.

Jared

Who is this now?

Wylie

Nar. Nar Kalepsy.

Jared

Oh great, but he's falling asleep again.

Wylie

Um so since you guys enter first, you can tell me what you do.

Alan

Uh me and Pyra. Okay, so Alan enters and he sees Nar uh standing there. And so walks in, kind of looks around, um, a little bit confused, but he sees Nar with the knife. He's like, Oh, Nar! What you doing? Are you prepping some dinner for us?

Wylie

And um Nar kind of jumps and and turns around and he's holding the knife in his hand, and he kind of looks at you a little blankly and says,

GNar Kolepsy

Uh, yeah, I was I uh was gonna make a snack. I was getting hungry.

Alan

Oh, that's great. Could you maybe make a little bit more? Uh I'm a little hungry too. Okay.

Wylie

And uh he's he's kind of like fumbling around the kitchen. He doesn't seem to really know he's definitely not the way that Gordon does. So he's he's looking for stuff and he kind of he he gets some bread that's on the counter and he like takes a raw egg, kind of smashes the raw egg on a bit of bread, and spreads it.

Alan

Oh, that's just how Sandy makes it too.

Wylie

And uh spreads it, spreads the

Alan

Love my egg bread.

Wylie

He uh spreads the raw egg and the shells around onto the bread, and then he offers it to you.

Alan

Um realistically, uh Alan takes it and is very confused, like even more confused now. Uh just kind of like says, Oh, thank you.

Wylie

Okay. And uh Pyra says,

Pyra Ember

Oh, I think it'll be it for Gordon. And she leans up against one of the like bar stools that you guys have at like a little eating island and sips on some of the fire whiskey.

Wylie

All right, and um then the rest of you probably start to file in pretty shortly after. Um Java comes on in and he found Bojangles. So um Java and Bojangles come on in and Gordon and Jared.

Gordon

Okay, or Jordan Gordon walked in and saw the knife and all that, and like, hey, what are you doing? This is my kitchen. I did not come into your tower and tell you how to do your job.

Jared

I really wish you would though. You're supposed to be out on lookout. What what are you doing over there, man?

GNar Kolepsy

Oh, yeah. I uh I got cold and hungry, so I came on in for a snack.

Jared

Understandable. He has 20 breaks saved up, and I don't know how, but he does.

Wylie

He's always on break and he always has him somehow.

Alan

Alan looks around, he's like, oh, everybody's here.

Jared

Yep, we're I'm not eating, Alan. Alright. Um, Gordon, can you start prepping some snacks for us to eat while I go over this meeting? Sure, sure. I'll I'll consult with the frying pen and see uh see if the frying pan is up for this. Um I take out like what a um medieval or uh magical uh thing of a uh whiteboard is that I've written all these notes that constantly get erased, like every single time, like hey, to do, and then somebody is like, you suck, or you something on it, like graffities in a little bit every single time. And I I think it's Gordon, but I can't, I never have the will. Yeah, can't prove it. Um, so I I'm like, I erase everything on the board, and I'm like, all right, ladies and gentlemen, thank you so much for gathering all here. Um, it feels like that the uh radiation is not a thing right now, so we're doing pretty good on that. Um on our next to-do list is BoJangles raises him.

Beau Jangles

Oh yes. Uh to be clear, I have not fixed it yet. Okay. I'm working on it.

Jared

We'll put that at number two, because number one is that we have weirdos as uh the neighbors to us. Um

Beau Jangles

we got weirdos?

Jared

Yeah, it's bad out here.

Beau Jangles

What kind of weirdos?

Jared

Um well so they have like jelly and they have an a they're they do not take care of their base.

Alan

Alan Alan takes a bite of his egg bed.

Jared

Crunch. Thank you Alan. Um and I uh I basically go over.

Wylie

Can we get a cheese it sound to use about so gross.

Alan

Um he rolled an 11, so he kinda likes it.

Jared

It's a very mid, but a little bit better than mid. Yeah,

Gordon

while while he's doing this whole announcement, Gordon is just in the corner, just making macarons. Just like he's just trying to de stress from this whole situation.

Jared

Um, I'm basically uh it probably will take me 15 20 minutes just to get over uh a couple of points of like, hey, I locked all the doors, this is why. Um, this is kind of what we found. Um, and I'll be like, Alan, do you have the journal?

Alan

He's like looking around um to see if he has a journal on him. Uh I don't think he would have put it down, so yeah. He still has it.

Jared

Awesome. Oh yeah, here Alan's been oh no, you can hold on to that. You're the one that's looking into that.

Alan

I am?

Jared

Oh boy. Um He needs his nap. Um

Wylie

Well when Java sees the journal, he says, um, oh, did you guys find some cool research notes over there? And you notice he's hold holding that um big um like jar that's holding it. He's really into this artifact. And he's like, I've been researching this artifact the entire time. I know you told me that I'm a hero. That's super important. Helps me to understand what this is about. And oh, I do have to tell you, I've made a development in my research.

Jared

It's not your turn in the meeting yet. So we'll we're gonna go around in a circle and you'll do your

Java Script

Oh okay. I didn't see um I didn't see research breakthrough on the agenda. We're gonna get there. Can we put it on the list, please? That way I can.

Jared

That's my thing, Java, all right? You you sit down right there.

Java Script

But can I see that research journal later?

Jared

Yeah, you can look at it now, I guess. Alan I think is asleep. Alan, you awake him. No, he's still just kind of staring at his bread.

Alan

I can never tell if Alan is on the No, he's he's not sitting down, he's standing.

Brad

He just falls asleep standing up with eyes wandering.

Wylie

I can never tell. He's not like Nar. He he gnar falls asleep standing up, not Alan. And um and you know, Alan usually needs to be in a comfy chair.

Jared

Awesome. Well, um, if we've noticed anything that is abnormal about squid monsters monsters, and I will uh um I will draw uh one of those things like mushroom squid things on the board. Uh I think he should roll for how good. Yeah, that's I'm literally grabbing my d20 right now.

Wylie

Roll for it.

Jared

Um it looks like a rhino I rolled natural one. It looks like a rhinoceros, um, and uh uh it has like a sword in it somehow. Um and then there's a bunch of dots everywhere. I'm like, if you see anything like this, and I look at it and I'm like, how did I how did I do that?

Wylie

Like And

Java Script

Java goes, so there's these mushroom monsters, and he holds up the page from the journal, and there's that thing.

Jared

Yes. But yes, mm-hmm, mm-mm.

Java Script

Okay, so so that thing, what do we call that thing?

Jared

Gooby! It's Jerry. It's Jerry, because he has no lens. Yeah. It's uh his name's Jerry. If we see one of these, that's an emergency 84, all right? That's an emergency 84.

Gordon

Um Gordon's just like, if you see something, say something, okay? And uh I speaking for the skillet, the skillet would would would like to know, okay?

Jared

Also, um, if you see not just something, because I remember when I said that first when we introduced, and everybody just started pointing at random things and say, Oh, I see a door, oh I see a I see a frying pan. That's if you see something dangerous, say something dangerous, all right. Well, not say something dangerous. Um anyway, I got this cool knife too, so that's pretty cool. Everybody goes, Ooh, yeah, it lights on fire. Anyway, I'm gonna put that in my back pocket.

Pyra Ember

Pyra says, then are you going to share this?

Jared

Um well, we actually were gonna also explode part of the base, too.

Pyra Ember

So that's yes, so so I get to use it then.

Jared

No, no, this is this is a part of uh this is research or something.

Pyra Ember

All right, but I get to explode part of base.

Jared

Yes, the basement of the base. We're looking to maybe uh see what's underground and see if there's any more of those squid things in the case. Oh any all right, we're gonna go around to our uh daily updates. Um let's just go uh let's start with you, Nar.

Wylie

Um, Nar has been has been standing there staring raptly, paying attention to your meeting the entire time.

GNar Kolepsy

And he goes, uh what what do you want?

Jared

Oh, just a daily update. Has there been any emergency situations or anything like that?

GNar Kolepsy

Um nope. Nope. Been pretty quiet.

Jared

Cool. Alright, Ram Shield, is there anything uh that you want to talk about or anything like that? Daily updates.

Gordon

Oh, sorry, sorry. Uh so uh what what I would like to say is uh as representative of the skillets, uh they are very important and I think they are forgotten very, very much, not taken care of very well. So if you can please do not uh do not uh randomly put water into these skillets. Um holding water is not good for them. Uh but if you want to put oil or things like that, it's very calming, very good for them. I I I think that is very, very important. Uh-huh. Do not forget. Alright, that's right. Speak for the skillets.

Jared

Alright, that's one, but I'm gonna count it as 1.5. So if you have a 0.5 thanks, that was pretty long. I put that all on the whiteboard, by the way. So this has all been written on the whiteboard.

Gordon

Uh and then yes, I would I would also say for uh yeah, look out for Jerry. Uh he seemed to be a nice guy until he got outside, and he was very, very mean.

Java Script

So please uh and so to be clear, that thing on the board that's J.

Jared

Yeah, I highlight, I circle it, and then I put Jerry exclamation mark, and then two eyes, and I draw two eyes.

Gordon

Yeah, yeah. But uh again, the way with uh with the skillets, just be it's it's very important that we take care of the skillets. Uh yes.

Jared

Awesome. Thank you so much, Ram Shield. Really appreciate that. Uh Bo Jangles. I've never done a staff meeting in DD before. That's crazy. Jingles, this is your turn. Go ahead.

Wylie

Man, this is hard. We'll go through all the things.

Jared

Oh, you know how it feels.

Beau Jangles

Um, all right. Um, I've been working on the heater this entire time. It is slow going. Um, the the heat is up, so as you could tell, it's that's toasting here. It's very comfortable. Good. Uh unfortunately, some of the arcanium is still leaking. I have not found the exact source of the leak. So you might still experience some arcanium sickness. And remember, if you start to feel a bit silly, maybe a little bit not yourself, the thing to do is go outside, get some fresh air, and maybe some snacks. But we do need to be careful because ice storm is coming.

Jared

Yep. Awesome. Do you need assistance with that?

Beau Jangles

Uh now the uh now that Pyra is back, I think she could probably help me with some of that.

Jared

Awesome. Pyra, are you good with that?

Pyra Ember

No problem.

Jared

Perfect. All right. I think that's everybody.

Wylie

Java?

Jared

Oh, right, Java. That's right.

Speaker 10

Java Alan.

Jared

I forgot about Alan too. I purposely skipped Java, forgot about Alan.

Wylie

So Java is rocking in his little chair. Just so holding this artifact, but also the journal. And he's been like reading the journal a lot during the staff meeting. Um, but he is really excited to tell you about this artifact that he has.

Jared

All right. Java, hit it, hit us with it. Artifact. All right, all right.

Speaker 10

Take a note. Number four?

unknown

All right. Okay.

Jared

There's no number three, but we're leaving a space just in case. Skillets are actually in number three.

Gordon

The skillets would like to know that, yes. So I I I will let them know.

Java Script

Um So Java says, all right, so I've been translating this um this really cool vase pitcher that we found. And um I the I was able to decipher some numbers on it. So the first thing it says is 7 Eleven. And the second thing it says, these are words now. Infinite gulp. So I don't know what it does or how to activate it yet, but that is what it meant.

Jared

Like Infinite Gulp, what could that mean?

Java Script

I don't know what it's an eleven. I don't know, But I'm Really excited that you brought this journal because some of the markings look the same, and I think with more data, I might be able to figure out how to activate it.

Gordon

As you say infinite gulp, Gordon just kind of goes, just wondering, like, what?

Wylie

How would one infinitely gulp?

Jared

Alright. That's great.

Java Script

Um also I kept the door to the lab locked the entire time for safety.

Jared

Good job, proud of you. Hey, you're a hero.

Wylie

Alright. He beams, a big smile.

Jared

Um, that's from the research area. Alan, you wanna say anything? I know you've been paying attention this whole time, so you got a lot going on over here. I know you were you were dying to tell us something.

Alan

Oh no, just just really happy to see everybody getting along. Um, when is dinner gonna be ready? That's my question.

Jared

Okay, well shouldn't add back over to Gordon, go ahead.

Gordon

Uh so let's see here. Uh I I I will consult the skillet's and find out uh what what what time we we should have uh dinner.

Jared

So probably 6 30 as usual time that we usually have it or not.

Gordon

No, it I I think it's a bit of big day for the skillets, so I will probably say let's push it to seven. Okay.

Jared

Everybody understand that's seven then. Yeah, seven o'clock. Cool. Seven eleven. Ooh. What if we have dinner at 7 eleven and then we all have gulps and then maybe I'm not a researcher.

Java Script

Um currently there's nothing to gulp. This is an empty jar.

Jared

Oh, okay.

Java Script

But it does say infinite gulp, so I don't know.

Jared

Alright. Well, that's good to know. Jerry in there. It's just the jelly. Um. Um, and then I'll shoot her and be like, all right, Pyra's gonna end us out. Pyra, you got anything that you want to mention or anything like that? Oh, we also got a new dog. Sorry, Pyra. Got a new dog named Finn. Um, so if you want to stop by, say hi to the dog, sure we'd love to say hi to you.

Alan

Isn't the storage shed right there? That's where the guy.

Pyra Ember

Um Pyro says, alright, so then we're gonna start blowing things up.

Jared

We'll talk we'll have a meeting after dinner. Um about that.

Pyra Ember

An explosive meeting. An explosive meeting. All right, all right. I'll go I'll go to fuel shed and uh take count of all the things we have there. How much the uh calculate how much it takes to blow all the way through the ground into the caverns, perfectly. Perfect.

Jared

We love to see that. Alright. All right, thank you guys so much. Um remember you're all doing a great job, and you're all wonderful people. And I I just point my fingers at everybody. I'm like, you, you're a great, you're great. I'm trying to keep everybody's spirits up, even though it's been really frustrating day.

Gordon

The the skillets very much appreciate the encouragement. Yes.

Wylie

Awesome. All right, um, can everybody roll a perception check, please?

Jared

Boy. Oh my goodness. All right. Do you need me to tell it to you?

Wylie

Yeah.

Gordon

I got a six.

Alan

Eight.

Jared

Twenty-two. Twenty-two. This is my job.

Wylie

All right. So Alan and Gordon don't notice this, but um, Jared, you hear a um, and as you recall, Mops got turned on to hyper speed before you guys left. Wang. Um Mops is your essentially Roomba cleaning robot that can also mop the floor. It's very high-tech.

Speaker 1

Nice.

Wylie

Um, but it is you have a lot of difficulty with the programming. And before you left, Alan got mad at it and hit it with a stick and activated the hyperspeed. So Mops has been cleaning furiously since you guys left. And you hear it zipping through the hallway and it comes zipping right on into the kitchen.

Jared

All right. Um, I figured somebody would take care of it, but I'll put it on the whiteboard and be like, all right, Mops also needs a little break.

Wylie

And so Mops is zipping around the kitchen at this point.

Jared

I have bonus action dash and action dash, so I'll chase it around.

Wylie

Okay, okay. Um why don't you

Jared

Meeting Adjourned!

Wylie

Why don't you give me some kind of an athletics check or something with advantage because of using your super fast skills?

Alan

How heavy is use Mops?

Wylie

It's pretty heavy. Like he's pretty bulky, but if you got a hold of it, you might be able to stop it.

Jared

I rolled a three and a nineteen for a 21.

Wylie

Okay. That's athletics. So that is with advantage. So you don't use the three, use the nineteen. So great job. Um, you are able to tackle mops and grab a hold of him and stop him from zooming around.

Jared

Yep.

Wylie

Um, but you are gonna have to fiddle around um to see if you can um like deactivate the high steel.

Jared

Java, come over here. Come help me out here.

Java Script

Sure thing, sure thing.

Jared

Help, somebody help me. This beast is untamable.

Alan

Alan starts throwing bread at Mop's mouth. Just this wet, slimy bread.

Gordon

Just sticky, eggy bread. It's it's basically that's French toast before it cooks. Yeah. I guess actually the question I would ask for Gordon's sake is Is Mops cleaning up all the food he's been preparing, though?

Wylie

Um, I mean, Mops is only on the floor and you've been cooking on the counter, I assume.

Gordon

So I was like, if if he's been like cleaning as I've been like cutting things up and he's cleaning it all up, I would Gordon would have a very angry moment.

Wylie

Yeah, you're probably starting to get a little on edge because he has been zipping around the kitchen, so you're probably like not super happy about it. So um Java comes over um while you're holding it down and he does an arcana check to turn off the turn off mops. Um and he normally he has a plus nine, but he rolled a two.

Jared

Can I give him advantage? Because bonus action uh because I might mastermind rogue. I can give bonus action uh the help action.

Wylie

Um yeah, yeah.

Jared

Let's go.

Wylie

I'll try again. All right, he did better. This is a dirty 20. Let's go. Um so he got a 11 plus nine dirty 20. He struggles with it. He does turn off the speed. Um, so that's good. Um at the same time, he pops open the um like cleaning tank.

Speaker 11

Yeah. Oh no.

Wylie

And you guys see that the cleaning tank is full of fuchsia jelly.

Jared

Oh, oh. All right. Um can I go into the storage room real quick and see if the dude is still there?

Wylie

Yeah. So you get up, um, so you you get off of mop's and leave him there. He's now stationary with the little his little lid is popped open and there's a bunch of bright fuchsia jelly inside. And so you're gonna go to the storage room. And um when you get to the storage room, there's no body in there.

Jared

I'm gonna be like, all right. No one saw any of the journal things or Jerry uh around, correct? Since everybody's still technically here.

Wylie

Yeah, so you you run back to the kitchen and you s since I speak to everybody.

Jared

Yeah.

Wylie

Um, and uh Java is trying kind of investigating the jelly at this point. Um and

Jared

don't eat it, Java.

Gordon

It is actually pretty spicy in a good way, just saying. a little bit metallic, but you know,

Java Script

that's not normally step one of the scientific process, uh, but good to know. And why do you know it's spicy?

Jared

He tasted it. He ate a lot. Like way more than normal.

Java Script

You ate vacuum jelly?

Jared

No, well, so there was like this. Remember when I told you guys all that there was like this jelly everywhere in all the areas? I think and I could be wrong, but I think it's the dead guy that we left in the storage room.

Java Script

The dead guy turned into jelly?

Jared

Yeah. Hey, I'm no researcher.

Wylie

And uh Bo Bo jangles says,

Beau Jangles

Well, I haven't seen anything. I've just been working in working in the maintenance room.

GNar Kolepsy

And um Nar says, Yep, nothing to see here.

Jared

That's usually what he says every single time he says that. Um, okay. Uh we do have uh a squid that we can experiment on. Uh it's currently outside in glass uh in like a bucket. Yeah, in a bucket in water. So it's frozen for sure. Yeah, super frozen. So there's that. All right, well, um do we have like a am I the medical officer? Who's the medical officer here?

Wylie

Uh yeah, who has the highest medicine, I guess?

Jared

I have a plus four.

Alan

What the heck? No idea, yeah. I am I'm proficient and I have a plus four as well.

unknown

I have a plus zero. Probably Alan then. Cool.

Jared

I'm like, all right. Alan, do you want to do some medical routines, make sure everybody's all healthy and everything? Um we'll start with um.

Alan

We'll start with gnar. Yeah, let's start with gnar. Um yeah, Alan uh starts kind of doing some medical examinations.

Wylie

Okay.

Jared

I'll stand next to him just as a like taking notes. Yeah, taking notes.

Wylie

Okay. So you like shine flashlights in the eyes, stick out their tongue and say, ah. Mm-hmm. Okay. Um you probably would have done initial physicals for everybody when they arrived. And as um, why don't you give me a medicine check? We'll tell you what we find.

Jared

Yeah, sure. I don't think I can help here, right?

Wylie

Yeah, you're just taking notes. Yeah, 17. 17. Um, as far as you can tell, everybody seems pretty normal. Cool.

Alan

Okay.

Speaker 13

Great. Great. Nice.

Jared

All right, Meeting adjourned.

Wylie

Nar Nar seems a little more wakeful. Like he hasn't fallen asleep for the whole meeting. Okay. That's kind of impressive.

Jared

And I like to see him engaged. It's really good. Nothing suspicious here.

Java Script

And so, Joe is so uh could I take this stuff back to the research?

Jared

Yes, please. Okay, great. Do you want uh us to send over the squid sample to? Yeah, yeah. Watch from a squid? Uh-huh. I don't know what we're gonna name it. But all right.

Gordon

Um Does Nar still have the knife that he had at the beginning?

Speaker 13

Yeah.

Jared

And is it a kitchen knife or is it his own knife?

Wylie

It's a kitchen knife.

Gordon

Okay. Then Gordon is gonna ask Narr, uh, excuse me, Nara, would you please uh drop the knife and not take it with you? I I I need that to stay in the kitchen.

GNar Kolepsy

Uh Nara says, Oh yeah, sure thing. And he drops the knife on the floor.

unknown

You told him to drop.

Gordon

You did tell him to tell him. No, no, no, no, no, not on the floor. Oh, I'm gonna have to sharpen this thing. This is gonna be all broken up.

GNar Kolepsy

Ting ting ting here. And uh so Nar says, okay, I'm gonna get back to work.

Jared

All right, hey. I appreciate that motivation, GNar Keep up the good work, keep doing your thing, GNar. Man, he's really grown since we've left. Uh, I'm gonna just go do uh classic security stuff and meeting adjourned and then I'll have a meeting after dinner with uh Pyra. So that's my schedule for today.

Wylie

That's your schedule. Okay, so um the whatever you left in the storage shed is gone. Um and so are you gonna do anything about that?

Jared

Honestly, I have no clue what to do. Uh I I think I take is uh is there like a bag around the jelly? Like take the jelly out basically.

Wylie

It's in it, it's in the tank. Yeah.

Jared

So we need to clean out the tank. Yeah. Okay, I'll do that. Um, and I will give the jelly to um basically all the research, all the things that are abnormal, giving it to the research team uh to do some stuff there.

Wylie

Okay. So do you give Java all of the clues that you found basically? All of the stuff. Everything. Do you give them the holo disc?

Jared

Uh yeah, the holo disc. I will probably stop by for that and I'll tell them like, hey, when we when uh you want to play that, uh just let me know. I'll come on by, all right?

Java Script

Great, great. I'll get a work eated that I'll call you on the uh walkie-talkies. Awesome.

Wylie

Great. Hero. So Java goes off to the research lab. Um you're doing rounds.

Jared

Yeah, I'm just gonna do security rounds. Uh all the doors are locked, and we'll stay inside because we're not gonna use the because of the storm that's happening. All the external doors. Yeah, all the external doors are locked.

Wylie

Okay.

Jared

And uh I will grab the the thing and bring it to. Uh when he radios me, I'll grab the the mushroom jellyfish thing. Okay. Uh and bring it over eventually.

Wylie

Okay. So yeah, so you're okay before the storm hits, you're gonna go grab the frozen mushroom thing. Okay. Um, so I'll put you uh at the research lab because that's what we're gonna be kind of next time. And then um, Gordon, I assume you're cooking in the kitchen.

Gordon

Just to cook him.

Wylie

All right. Um Pyra is going out to the fuel shed for right now before the storm hits. Yep. Um and Bo Jangles is gonna go back and work on stuff. And Alan, what are you gonna do?

Alan

Did anyone tell him to go anywhere? No. That he's right there.

Wylie

You're just sitting on a stool in the kitchen hanging out with Gordon.

Jared

That's it. Heroes. Every single one of them my heroes.

Wylie

Okay. And since we're changing scenes, I'm gonna load our lab, but can everyone also give me another constitution saving throw? Okay, so in the lab, um eventually Java radios you. Um, so you were doing rounds until then. So we've got a little bit of time.

Jared

I will radio uh Gordon and well, and Alan, but Alan won't have his radio on him. But he'll be with Gordon. Yeah, but he's with Gordon, so I'll be like, um if you guys want to stop by the lab, you're more than welcome to. Um I know Gordon, you're working on dinner, but if there's like a pause point, I don't know if you can pause your game or no, I'm just kidding.

Gordon

He's actually just playing overcooked. That's how he makes dinner. And it's all actually instant meals or whatever. Yeah.

Wylie

Uh Java Java pops on and says, uh uh

Java Script

Dr. Dr. Alan, I think you should come here so we can go over the research discoveries.

Gordon

Yeah, but he's probably making like gumbo, and you have to just sit in center for a long time. Cool.

Alan

So if Alan hears that from Gordon's radio, then yeah, he'll just get up and walk over. Cool. Yep.

Java Script

Yeah, and I could use uh Gordon's perspective on this the taste of this jelly. That might help.

Wylie

So Gordon and sorry, Dr. Fizzard.

unknown

Dr.

Wylie

Fizzard, he would have called you. Um so you guys all arrive in the lab. And um so uh the first thing Java says is

Java Script

okay, so the first thing that I found out about this really cool pot, you guys ready for this one? The the big vase like thing that he's been holding? The one that says 7-11 infinite gulp. I found out that it can produce its own liquid. Okay, and it can make lots of different kinds, and it just keeps making more and more as you pour it out. It makes so much more. So we could make like apple juice, or we could make like oil.

Jared

Okay, that's useful. Apple juice is not as useful as oil.

Gordon

How how about Kavas? Can it do kivas?

Java Script

Oh, what's what's Kavas?

Gordon

Uh Kavas is it is like a fizzy drink, but it has kind of the flavor of bread. I kind of like beer, but but not but none of the effects of beer.

Java Script

Hmm. Well, I'm not really sure yet because I didn't know what kivas was, but but maybe, maybe if we put some cavas in, I've still figured it out. So I've figured out a few things so far. Like apple juice, acid, oil, uh, water. Water is important for sure. Um, those kind of things so far. So I don't know about that one, but we could try.

Jared

Um what's the idea of trying? O

Gordon

h, sorry. Oh, it's okay. I just wanted to try Skabas. It's the best.

Java Script

Sounds good. Do you know how to make that?

Gordon

Oh yeah, my chef. What why would I not know how to make that? I make it at home all the time.

Java Script

Maybe we guess I would put it in. Maybe we could do that.

Gordon

Sounds like a great idea.

Jared

Um, what's the temperature in here?

Wylie

This is a normal you guys don't it is not a chili lab or anything, so it's just

Jared

I'm gonna be like, oh, can we turn down the temperature while we have the ice thing in here?

Java Script

Oh yeah, I could turn it out a little bit, but I don't think it's made to get to freezy.

Jared

So if he gets so it probably won't help all that time, huh?

Wylie

But we could keep it kind of cold. Okay. And if I think um we can look at the overall map real quick. Um I think all of the different parts of the base have doors to the outside. Um, because they're all these little individual spheres connected by hallways, so they all do have exits to the outdoors as well. Um, so you could just stick it back out in the snow.

Jared

Okay. Um is there like a box? Like a I just think of the first transformers when they have that like clear box and then they z they like zap it with the power cube and then it transforms like their phone, and then they then they'll do you remember that scene? Yeah. That's what I I'm thinking of. Like, is there like a clear box like reinforced box or anything that we have in this lab? I'm guessing not.

Wylie

So roll for transformer box?

Jared

Yeah, roll for transformer box. Uh natural 19.

Wylie

I was that was so close. I was gonna let you have it for a nat 20.

Jared

Oh, that would have been so good. That's when you have transformer box.

Wylie

No transformer box. Sorry.

Jared

All right, so I will leave it outside until until we want to start experimenting on it.

Wylie

Okay.

Jared

Outside the lab specifically.

Wylie

Yeah. Um, yeah, so he'll know that it's right outside the lab and stuff, and um, he'll probably need a little bit more time to research on it. Um, and so then um he's like, okay, let's get this holodisc going. And so he sets the holodisc on you guys as player and um it projects up off of the table like a little three-dimensional screen, um, like a three-dimensional um augmented reality almost.

Jared

Like it looks like there's a little Obi-Wan Kenobi style. Yeah.

Wylie

Drawing out. And um so it the there's footage. Um at this time the audio does not seem to be working, but you can see footage of the what you recognize to be the staff from the other base, and they're going out into the snow and they're digging in the snow, and they extract the a big rectangular or um cube, you know, and they bring it on into the lab. And um, so you can see that process of them kind of retrieving that discovery.

Jared

Um what's in the cube?

Wylie

Um, there's nothing in the cube. Cool. At this point. Um, they just found they could tell that it was different from the ice and stuff and frozen. And um you see so some little clips of them um doing some experiments with it um where they've heated it up and you can and they, you know, that you could tell that it kind of like jiggles and like, oh, and you know, like burns because it's acidic. Um so as you as you guys probably know, as Alan would know about gelatinous cubes, um these are large um cubes that are pretty when they're not frozen, they're like they're completely transparent. So they're really hard to see. A lot of times adventurers will walk into them um in tunnels and caverns, and um sometimes in dungeons, you know. Um and it does acid damage, and so you can get absorbed into it, and while your body is stuck inside the cube, it will do continual acid damage to you, almost like digesting you. Um Um so Alan would be familiar with those attributes of a gelatinous cube.

Jared

Did you get your masters in gelatinous cube?

Alan

No. Oh, okay just my minor.

Jared

Oh, okay.

Wylie

They're they're pretty rare. They're not like a big deal. You know, it's not like they're in every castle. Okay. Um, but Alan would be kind of familiar with the properties of that. And um, so it seems like that this research center had discovered, hey, if we keep cold frozen, it's a lot easier to interact with it and it's not doing acid damage to us. Cool. Um, but if it's heated up, then it would do acid damage. Um and that is mostly what you see on the holo desk. Um, but Alan, can you give me a history check?

Alan

Mm-hmm. Uh 19.

Wylie

19. Alan, you remember that with older technology, it's not just one side that plays information, but the other side of the disc plays information as well. So you know that if you flip over the disc and put it back on the player, okay, you might get some more information.

Alan

Side B. Sure. If that's what pops into his head, he will walk over and say, Well, what's the other side? What does the other side say?

Java Script

The other side, what are you talking about? Digital information. Does it have other sides? It's just a like.

Alan

Alan just walks over it.

Wylie

Um, so this time you don't see anything.

Alan

Learn something new, Skippy.

Jared

I'll be like, man, old man has near tricks.

Wylie

Uh at first everything is silent, and um then you hear like a scraping sound, and um and you hear a voice, and it says,

Wylie

We've we've been attacked. We don't know what it is. Something happened to Stanky. I don't something's not right.

unknown

It smells terrible in here.

Wylie

He was he was in the kitchen um assisting with breakfast, and then I I don't know what happened. Um and suddenly he started attacking us, and strange things are happening. Not everyone seems to be who they are. There's this jelly that we're finding everywhere. If anyone finds this, you have to destroy the base. Don't let anyone leave alone.

Alan

We gotta nuke the base. Okay. Okay. Alan's like, well, nothing there either.

Jared

Uh stress levels are high for uh Jared. And it'll be like, all right, um has anybody been acting abnormal to you guys? Anybody that you could think of that when we were in the meeting that was just like weird or uncomfortable or anything like that.

Alan

Nope.

Gordon

Is there a check I could roll to see if Gordon noticed anything?

Wylie

Um yeah.

Jared

Yeah, can I also roll like an insight check?

Wylie

Yeah, yeah, you can roll an insight check and kind of on your memories and your interactions with everybody since you've been back at base.

Jared

Oh, it was almost an 18. Yep.

Gordon

Is it insight? It is a 19.

Jared

Uh mine's 14.

Wylie

A 19 and 14. Gordon, you remember Narr didn't fall asleep through that whole meeting, which was pretty abnormal for him, considering it was a long meeting.

Jared

Long meeting. It was. It was literally, I said it would be 15 minutes, 45 minutes, 45 minutes, and 90% was me and Skillet.

Wylie

So me and Skillet.

Jared

Um, I'm blind to that. Like, because I have such high hopes for Nar. I'm so blind to that.

Wylie

You just think it's your inspiring person.

Jared

And I'm like, oh man, he's doing so good. He's so improved. He took up the leadership.

Wylie

I feel like now that we had an actual like incident.

Jared

Yeah, exactly. He's woken up.

Wylie

He's not, yeah.

Jared

No pun intended.

Gordon

Uh well, uh I noticed that uh oh hello, sorry. Uh I I noticed that uh GNar was uh awake the whole time. Which is not normal for GNar. It can't be. I think that he uh something is off with him. Because normally he in the long meeting would already be passed out probably within the first minute or two.

Jared

Oh no. Just tears. My boy Nar. He's not actually my son. Just that I'm just making that clear. So good. Alright, we'll have to confront him. Alright. I don't know if I'm strong enough.

Wylie

Um, everyone give me a perception check.

Jared

Ooh, that's real good. I got a 26.

Wylie

26.

Jared

No, the 20.

Wylie

Okay. The 26. The 20. Both Jared and Gordon, you guys hear dogs barking. Oh.

Jared

Alright. Um, would you guys be okay? Uh you guys want to come help me confront Nar? Uh, you keep working. You're doing a great job. Java? Mm-hmm.

Java Script

Okay. And Java says, Alright, alright, I got this. And uh he's like, I'll go to investigate this uh frozen thingy we got here.

Gordon

Okay. Well, don't forget the Kavas. Okay. The Kavas are very, very, very important.

Java Script

Okay, what's what's priority number what? So the squid creature or the Kavas?

Jared

It's definitely the squid creature.

Gordon

I think it's Kavas.

Java Script

Alright. Um, Dr. Fizzard, what should I prioritize?

Jared

I give you a long stare.

Gordon

Gordon just gives like, he rarely gives these out, but he gives a smile and is like, eh?

Alan

What did they find anything about the jelly?

Wylie

Um he hasn't had enough time to fully research it yet, but if you but researching the jelly and the mushroom would probably be a part of his next investigation.

Alan

Okay. He'll say this start with the jelly and the in the vacuum.

Wylie

Start with the vacuum jelly. Yeah. Okay. And then the uh then the mushrooms after that.

Jared

Gorm sham sh uh shield will remember this. And that's fine.

unknown

Yeah.

Jared

He's just he's like, he just gives a very like he was smiling, and then he just went like deadpan, just like, come on, his face just went dark.

Speaker 1

Yeah.

Wylie

All right.

unknown

Cool.

Jared

We'll head to the dogs.

Wylie

Okay, you guys take off to the kennels. Um, so as you arrive at the dog kennels, um, all the dogs um seem uneasy, and Finn is up and barking at Kolepsy, who is standing in there.

Jared

Oh, Nar?

Wylie

Yep.

Jared

Okay.

Wylie

And um he's he's kind of just standing looking confused, and like maybe he was there to um like feed the dogs or something, but the dog Finn is not happy about him.

Jared

I'm gonna have my uh hand on the dagger just in case if like something crazy happens. Um and I'll approach him like, are you feeling okay, buddy? Hand out.

Wylie

And um he turns around and looks at you, and tentacles just sprout from his body. Roll for initiative. Oh no.

Speaker 11

Oh no, no, no, no.

Jared

Five. I got a 14.

Wylie

He got a two. That's basically for him. All right, so what do you do?

Jared

Um, I want to so it's just sprouting from his body.

Wylie

Yeah, so he's he's standing there. Yeah. Eyes are blank, his body started to shudder, and then tentacles just started coming.

Jared

Burst out of his body. Oh boy. I don't want to kill him. Um, I'm gonna give the bonus action. Uh uh, I'm gonna go over to Ramshield and I'll help him with the bonus action with whatever he's gonna do. I'm gonna be like, It's time to act. Um and then I will it's time to act. Um, and I'll take out my new fancy sword or uh fancy dagger, and I will uh attack this individual. Okay. GNar. Uh non-lethal. So I'm not gonna be doing any of the fire damage or anything. I don't wanna I don't want to act.

Wylie

No fire damage.

Jared

Yep. Okay. Uh that is a 19 to hit.

Wylie

Okay, you hit.

Jared

Sweet. Uh it's only 1d6. Uh, and that's seven slashing damage, non-lethal slashing damage.

Wylie

Okay, what does it look like when you slash him?

Jared

Uh I kind of like am just going for the tentacles. So I'm just like, um, and I'm like, come on, GNar, snap out of it, buddy. I'm so proud of you. You're a hero. That's a body's a hero. That is um, that's everything.

Wylie

Okay. So um you slash at one of the tentacles, he kind of falls back a little bit, but stands up and is still just kind of blank face, like not his normal gnar personality at all. Okay. Um, and so sorry, Jared was up first, and I think Gordon, you're up next.

Gordon

Yeah, yes. Um Gordon is probably uh he's definitely wrestling with this because he's like, I I I don't want to be in the middle of this and you know, trying to be a pacifist, but but because he is friends with Nar, he does see like I need to do something to help my friend. So which he does have his trusty skillet with him, uh, and proceeds to walk up and try to just smack literally the tentacles out of him.

Wylie

Okay. So, yeah.

Jared

Uh, and you have advantage because I gave you my uh master uh master of tactics, which is a bonus action help. And so he walks up and he's like, I I am so sorry to do this Gnar, but I I'm trying to help you uh just just for your own sake, okay. 13 again. Alright, 13 it is.

Wylie

13 to hit?

Jared

Yep. You hit ah cool. Oh, sweet. Good. Um and then I guess I'm I'm using my was it, tavern brawler to use random objects.

Wylie

Yeah, so you get to use any improvised object.

Jared

Yep.

Wylie

Awesome. Um, so because you used some did some cold damage, um you notice that like the tentacles are moving a little bit more slowly as they kind of writhe and move around and stuff. So um it seems like that maybe the cold has slowed um this thing. All right, Alan, you're up next.

Jared

Fireball.

Alan

No, I'm

Wylie

in the dog Kennel?.

unknown

Yeah, in the angle.

Alan

Is anyone close to him right now? Yeah, we're both up and you're both up and in there.

Jared

We can take it. Whatever you got, we can take it. We're both we're both good.

Alan

Okay. So Alan sees you guys kind of like wrestling up there, and he doesn't like all the commotion. So in the back of the room where he's standing, um you see him like pop open one of his little pockets on his belt, like a little, you know, leather case with a little snap snap pocket, opens that up, and he pulls out um a cricket, like a live cricket.

Jared

Okay.

Alan

And it's chirping. And with the cricket, uh, he casts sleep.

Jared

No. We can take it, we can take it.

Alan

Um at mainly at Nar and and all of the creatures that are surrounding him.

Jared

So I think that's a 30-foot thing, and I'm pretty sure it is 90 feet. Yeah, so all of the dogs are also affected by it. Yeah. Yeah. And it goes from least to most uh health.

Alan

Health. Yeah, so you have to roll. Right. I did roll already. Um 31.

Wylie

31.

Alan

31.

Wylie

And so it uses up the health as it goes. Yes, right?

Alan

Yep. Okay. So it's least to most. So hopefully the squid things inside of him.

Jared

Well, I'm worried that you're gonna put all the dogs to sleep before we you get you think the dogs have less HP than the squid things?

Alan

Yeah.

Wylie

If this is what he he this is what he cast. So and you're standing here and it's kind of in a radius around you. Is that how it goes?

Jared

It's a radius around gnar, but yeah.

Wylie

Okay, a radius around gnar. So focused on nar. Okay. And so you choose nar.

Alan

Nar is the point.

Wylie

Okay. So we'll get a little nitty-gritty about the feet in here and see.

Jared

Um because we're both standing next to him, too.

Wylie

Yeah. So you guys well, yeah, you guys being right in there.

Jared

I have 21 health.

Wylie

You have 21. How much does Gordon have?

Jared

50.

Wylie

50. Okay. So Gordon's gonna be unaffected because he's gonna be the last one. You have 21.

Jared

Yes. So if I have less HP than Narr currently, then or the squid thing.

Alan

Or the squid things inside. That's my hip, is that the squid things have their own individual HP.

Wylie

So, um

Alan

We're about to find out.

Jared

So that's the whole DM, so go ahead and tell us that.

Wylie

So uh Jared is standing right in front of Nar, and um his knees buckle and he falls asleep.

Jared

I'm like, all right, we got this. Back to back, here we go.

Wylie

And Finn, who has been barking at Nar this whole time, also falls asleep.

Alan

Okay.

Wylie

And Nar remains standing.

Alan

Oh. So who wait, who went down? It was me, you and the dog. Yeah. Oh, I go.

Jared

We got this! So Jared. I would like to remind the DM that I am now uh unconscious, and any attacks have auto crits on me. And if you hit it. So hey, that's just just wanna want to throw that out there. But I'll wake up if you hit me. So that's pretty cool too.

Wylie

And it is uh gnar or the thing's turn. Whatever nar has become, and it's his turn. Um, so I'm gonna roll to see what he does to see if he just considers you not a threat, or to see if he considers you interesting. Um, can you pick a number between one and six?

Jared

Um five. That was a terrible number. I shouldn't pick five. (he got a 5!)

Speaker 15

Yo boy.

Wylie

So the tentacles um from GNars body extend and they go down and they scoop up Jared off of the floor, and they're bringing Jared in close to GNars body.

Alan

Okay. Without damage?

Wylie

They don't do any damage at this time. They don't do any damage yet.

Jared

This is this is probably the best sleep I've ever had in my life. I'm being cuddled. I'm a being swaddled. Well, you do have to check one thing here to make sure. No, okay. It's just making sure that gnomes can fall asleep because you know I reach for everything. So that's it. Yep, we're good.

Wylie

Yeah, sometimes you aren't people are immune to sleep. So it now is Jared's turn, and I don't think there's anything he can do about sleep. There's no wisdom safe, so he's done for right now. So, Gordon, you're up next.

Gordon

Oh my goodness.

Wylie

Um, is being scooped up by a tentacle monster.

Jared

Boss. I don't know if buddy is not scared.

Alan

So for sleep, if you can get to him, you can shake him awake. As an action. As an action?

Jared

Or you could hit me or hit him.

Wylie

Yeah, if you do damage to him.

Alan

Oh, yeah. Okay.

Jared

Oh, okay. Um I love the idea uh while you're thinking of what to do. I love the idea that um, you know, it's actually I'm the only one that's left in the dark. Everybody else is you know, infected, and you two are also infected. And the DM was like, no, no, no. You'll never wily over here. I've been pranked. I'm scared.

Wylie

They've been infected this whole time. The whole thing was a simulation for Jared. Yeah.

Jared

Okay. So I'm gonna keep using uh tavern brawler. Um and this is uh yeah, Gordon just sees uh Jared being taken in. It's like he just needs to wake up. Like if I can wake him up, he'll be okay. Uh so he takes his frying pan and rears back and Swings.

Wylie

Are you swinging at Jared or are you swinging at um Nar?

Jared

I'm gonna swing. Oh man. I think I should just swing at Jared.

Wylie

Okay. So it's gonna be against your AC, Jared.

Jared

Yep. 13. You have advantage?

unknown

Yeah.

Gordon

I just got a 15 plus.

Jared

I want to see if you crit. Yeah. I'm just kidding. Uh, because it's an auto-crit. So wait, wait, wait. If you hit me.

unknown

Oh.

Jared

That's alright. You've already done it, Chief. That's why that's why I mentioned it. Oh no. Welcome to D anyway. I guess if I would have done an unarmed strike, if that would have been an effect. You swore, Chief. I know, I know, I know. It's too late now.

Wylie

Your unarmed strike is pretty strong, anyways. Like it's probably the one d4 also.

Gordon

Dang, I should have gone for Nar.

Jared

Oh, I love it. I love this. So you uh how do you do crits? Is it uh we are crits. 2d4 or 2 the damage dice or max one?

Wylie

Yeah, we'll just do double damage dice for loose time for for this one shot.

unknown

Cool.

Jared

So that's four. Plus your strength? Plus two. So six damage.

Wylie

Six damage to Jared.

Jared

But does it wake him up?

Wylie

He's awake.

Jared

Yep. He's awake. Oh my hand! What am I in my hand? Oh gosh!

Gordon

Oh, you're awake.

Jared

Full panic. I also probably don't want my sword because I probably or my knife because I probably dropped it. Yeah, cool.

Wylie

But it's on the ground right next to you.

Jared

I have another one.

Gordon

So this one is like you told at your door. I needed to wake you up, so I think you owe me two spices.

Speaker

I'm sorry.

Gordon

You all you owe me two spices.

Jared

Please help somebody's trying to eat me. GNar's eating me.

Java Script

Uh you hear the walkie-talkie go, oh, is everything okay, guys?

Jared

Oh, please, somebody help me, please. Oh my gosh, we're all dying. We're all gonna die.

Java Script

Do you want me to come to the kennels right now?

Jared

No, don't do that. Uh, okay.

Wylie

Um, Alan, you're up.

Alan

Oh boy. Um, well, that spell doesn't use concentration, so it's just gonna last a minute for Finn to wake back up.

Wylie

Um it only lasts a minute.

Alan

One minute. Oh my god, it was longer. Nope. One minute.

Jared

Um put me back to sleep.

Alan

No, let's try it again. Let's try it again.

Wylie

Um Jared hasn't slept that well in his entire life.

Jared

That was so nice. That was the worst experience ever. I got hit in the face with a frying pan.

Gordon

You're like, I will never go into a deep sleep again.

Speaker 1

Uh-huh. Yeah.

Wylie

Bad things happen when you rest well.

Jared

Um It's so funny that Nar is the one that we're fighting, and then I fall asleep while fighting Nar. That's very good.

Wylie

The one time you don't want GNar to fall asleep.

Jared

Sorry, I'd have to look something up.

Wylie

Or you do want GNar to fall asleep.

Gordon

You could you end up falling asleep instead.

Wylie

Now you know why he does it all the time. Yeah. It's really nice.

Jared

It's really nice, but bad things happen. This is why he doesn't he shouldn't do it. Okay.

Alan

Sorry. What are you thinking? We're going to Oh no it's not.

unknown

Okay.

Alan

Within range. Thirty feet. So now Alan sees that it that didn't work. Um, he's gonna cast reduce.

Wylie

Mm.

Alan

Interesting on Alan. Or I'm sorry, not on himself in it.

Jared

He's the one that's at the strange.

Wylie

So he cast reduce on Gnar.

Alan

Um yeah, cast reduce on Gnar. Uh is either a creature or an object that is neither worn nor carried. If the target is unwilling, uh make a constitution saving throw.

Wylie

Okay. Fourteen.

Alan

My spell save DC is fourteen. Meets it, Beats it. Right there. So close. Okay.

Wylie

So you cast a spell and you see um GNar kind of like shivers and sort of like draws into himself, but then expands back up and he doesn't shrink and doesn't get any smaller.

Alan

Okay. Great. Um Alan kind of walks maybe ten feet away.

Wylie

Backwards. Backs up. Yep. All right. And it is now GNARS. Tentacle GNARS.

Jared

He still has me, right?

Wylie

He's still holding you.

Jared

Um he does.

Wylie

Okay. Um it is going to back away because it feels like it's getting, you know, attacked, but it's carrying Jared with him. And so backs up to the wall, and tentacles extend from his back and starts spider climbing up a wall. So Nar is facing you guys, holding um Jared in his tentacles, and then just almost seems to like levitate as other tentacles extend from the back and starts climbing up the wall.

Jared

Does uh do you get an attack of opportunity? Does Ramstring?

Wylie

Um because you Yeah, you probably would have been within range, huh? Yeah, because even though we didn't have you that close on the map, you probably would have been right up against him. So yeah, go ahead and do an attack of opportunity.

Jared

This is terrifying. This is terrifying. I would hate to see like anybody that I know backwards walk spider climb up the hill while holding my friends.

Gordon

How does uh attack of opportunity work? It's just a regular hit. Yeah. So I can't do any of my like bonus stuff or not like that.

Wylie

No, it's just a normal hit. Unless you um if you had some like some people have like hellish rebuke or something, like things that they can put on top of it as a reaction. Um so sometimes you might have any something special. But otherwise it would just be like a normal attack.

Jared

And I assume I was just a d20. Yeah. Yep. All right. Let's send it.

Gordon

Uh do I do any of my like strength stuff too? Yeah. So 17.

Wylie

17 to hit. Okay. Yeah, you hit him. Hit him.

Jared

1d4. plus your strength.

Alan

Alright.

Gordon

Uh three.

Wylie

Three.

Jared

Every damage counts. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Wylie

So as he's moving away from you, you reach out and slash one of the tentacles, and um, you're hitting it with your your pan. Frying pan, yeah. Alright. With the frying pan.

Jared

Good great the sounds.

Wylie

So that tentacle moves a little less.

Jared

Stop.

Wylie

And he's now backed away from you guys over here against the wall of the kennel and is about halfway up the wall.

Jared

How tall are the ceilings?

Wylie

Um that makes sense. Like 15 foot ceilings?

Jared

Yeah, probably.

Wylie

Yeah, for this room. The biosphere is bigger, but this was fine.

Jared

Um. Is it my turn?

Wylie

Oh wait, yes.

Jared

Yes. Uh I will take uh because that was my fancy dagger, but I have a regular dagger, correct? On me? Okay. Uh I'm in full panic mode, so I'm just gonna uh let's see. Do I have anything that's gonna actually do anything? No, forgery kit won't help me here. Um you can use a help action start raiding someone additionally when you use the help action to aid an ally and attacking the target of the attack can be within 30 feet of you. Okay. So I can't do anything but you uh you at I'm just gonna flat out attack. I can't get any of my roguish archetype things out right now because I'm here.

Wylie

And so you're essentially grappled. So which means you can still attack, because you don't actually have to break away to attack.

Jared

Uh I'd probably attack with disadvantage though, right?

Wylie

Let me tell track uh

Jared

zero camp of fans. Uh yeah, there's no there's no disadvantage. Yeah, which is fine, because you're just done. I'll attack. Uh yeah, natural 15.

Wylie

Yep, you hit.

Jared

And then plus uh 1d6, that's not great. Uh so three slashing damage. Um, and I'm like, any kind of help would be helpful here. Uh thank you for the nap though. I really appreciate it, Doctor. Um yeah. And that's that's the end of my turn. Um yeah, it's not great. I'm not in a good situation. I can't really do anything. Um yeah, that's it. Uh I can't even go cunning action. All right. I can I'll I'll bonus action cunning ash and dash, but my uh speed is zero, so it doesn't really matter. It just doubles my zero. I'm like running in air of like, please slashing wildly. All right, that's the end of my turn.

Wylie

Okay, um, you are up, Gordon.

Gordon

I'm up now.

Wylie

Yep.

Gordon

Okay. Um just a second.

Jared

Does Nar look rough? Does he like look hurt at all?

Wylie

Um some of the tentacles look like they're coming off. Okay.

Jared

So we're doing damage. That's good. Hey, we love to see it.

Gordon

I'm like trying to think if we want to figure out how to get this guy outside.

Jared

I was saying the same thing, but we're if I go down in his arms, I'm done for, dude. Yeah.

Gordon

Um can I see if there is any I guess I don't know if this is an action, but would I be able to see the uh the what is it, the dagger?

Wylie

Yeah, it's on the ground. You can pick it up.

Jared

Yeah. Okay, so I'll pick up the dagger. Sweet. Although I mean I don't know. Okay. Trying to figure out. Because if he's up the wall, if he's climbing up the wall, I can't just run up to him and hit him.

Wylie

You're he's still within reach.

Jared

He's still within reach.

Wylie

He's not that far up, yeah. Okay.

Gordon

So first I would need to actually go over to him. Yep. Uh so I'll go over, um, and then from there. I think I think with the start of all of this, um kind of this happening, although Gordon has been a pacifist, the rage is starting to come out. Let's go. And so he begin, he's been trying to hold back and not go off the rails. But just with the fighting intents, uh the intensity of the fighting uh and different things, it just it all of the work that he has done has just put him right back into his old days. Uh, and so he just begins to yell. Um I am Gordoram uh and starts to lose it. Um I guess my other question would be um I guess for the DM, right? So I do have a battle axe in inventory. I would assume he has it on him.

Wylie

Sure.

Jared

Okay, cool.

Wylie

Yeah, if you think that he that's something that he would carry around, even though he doesn't expect to use it. Right.

Gordon

Well, I think I think he would probably keep it, especially with like cutting wood, different stuff like that, make fires to cook. Yeah. Um definitely so okay. Boy.

Jared

Well from a 1D four to a one D12 or else yeah. Yeah.

Wylie

So he has a battle axe that is hit that he uses for chopping wood and um, you know, when you occasionally have to, you know, process a chicken for dinner, you know. You don't do you try to stick to the eggs mostly, but sometimes, you know. Yep. Gotta have chicken sandwich,

Gordon

so um so he pulls out the battle axe is is what he what it goes with. Um and he begins to rage. And so, okay. So with that, yeah.

Jared

And if you want a reckless, then you get advantage, but they also have advantage against attacks against you. Do I have reckless? Yeah. All barbarians have reckless.

Gordon

Oh, okay. I guess I get advantage on him, but he also gets advantage on me.

Jared

Everybody would get advantage on you. So if it were other enemies, yeah.

Gordon

Gotcha, um, I'm just gonna rage, I think, on this one. Yeah. Alright. Really regretting that red losing. Yeah, no, I am. This is the first time going angry, you know. Yeah, yeah. He hasn't done it in a while. So he just misses.

Wylie

So Gordon gets so angry, he runs up, he's grabbing that axe off of his hip, he's swinging it up in the air, and he chops it right into the wall next to GNar.

Jared

I feel like there's a moment between me and GNar where we both look at each other like we're both in trouble.

Wylie

GNar's face is still strangely expressionless, but he's he's got you there. Okay.

Jared

Okay, with rage, do I get anything else though? Um, I think that No, that's only on d damage and stuff. Okay, okay. Gotcha.

Wylie

Alan.

Alan

Um Alan sees Gordon miss.

unknown

Wow, call out.

Alan

Call out. Um, is my thirty. Are these squares accurate?

Wylie

Um, roughly. Okay. Yeah. You you can get over to him if you need to be within touch.

Alan

I just I want to get within 30 feet. Yeah, you can get within 30 feet. Okay. So I think that's like just below Finn. Yeah. Um He's gonna try reduce again.

unknown

Okay.

Alan

Yeah. So another Tony needs another con save. Con save.

Wylie

Nine.

Alan

Nice. Let's go. Okay.

Wylie

So you cast reduce. What does it look like when you cast reduce?

Alan

Um, so he pulls out out of another pocket on his belt. Um let me see what it actually says here. I think it's a pinch of powdered iron. So a pinch of powdered iron out of his little pocket, and he just blows it in the direction of Nar, and you see this crystallized black powder with like these nice little shimmering uh like metallic bits of metallic bits of of light fly over to Nar, goes right around Jared, and kind of lightly engulfs the body and then reduces him. I don't know how small.

Wylie

Okay.

Alan

I can make him. I've I've never uh It's only one size smaller. So one size He'll be the same size size size as you. Okay, so there you so he'll have to automatically now he's a little a little gnar.

Wylie

Um so I think that would make him fall off the wall. So he just he drops to the floor, he's standing on his feet. He's um gnome size now, so he's a little um and so Jared, you he would probably let go of you in the process of and so his his tentacles get a little bit shorter, his whole body gets small shorter, he falls to the ground, and so now he's standing um nose to nose with Jared.

Jared

Cool.

Wylie

A little on the floor.

Alan

That's one minute with concentration.

Wylie

Okay. And it is his turn up next, and so he's gonna try to grapple Jared, the only one that's his size anymore.

Gordon

It tries to grapple Gordon if he's going for a leg.

Wylie

Okay, he rolls a 17 on his natural 19. You resist. So these tentacles are reaching out for you, and and the little suction cups are kind of snagging on your face. Yeah. And you're able to just bat them right.

Jared

No more.

Wylie

And we go back, and it's Jared's turn.

Jared

Oh, now I'm angry. Um, all right. I'm going to uh has no rage. Yeah, I have no rage. I'm gonna move to the right of him so then we can get flanking if you want to. Um, and I will attack him. Uh I don't have advantage, but I will get sneak attack um if I hit.

Wylie

Okay.

Jared

That was so close to the one, yeah. Um, but it's a natural 16, uh, so that's a left uh 21, sorry. 21 to hit, okay. Yeah, and now I got sneak attack. Uh no holding back. Um I just don't think it's great. Um, I should get 3d6, I think. Uh yep, 3d6, I believe a total. 4d6. Uh oh yeah, that's really good. Uh uh 15 points of slashing damage. Ooh, 15. I go full security mode and I'm like, please put everything put your arms down or up. Um and I slash him.

Gordon

Just sticks them in between, doesn't he know what to do with them.

Jared

Just go stop. And that is lethal. I'm making that lethal. Lethal.

Wylie

Okay.

Jared

I'm going. I I don't I don't know anything else. I'm panicking.

Wylie

So with that slash, multiple tentacles fall on the floor.

Jared

Um then hold uh real quick, is that a door next to me, right behind me?

Wylie

Yeah, that could be.

Jared

Cool. Um, and then I will um uh touch the thing and open the is that the door to the outside?

Wylie

Mm-hmm.

Jared

I'll open the door to the outside so it starts getting cold in here.

Wylie

Okay, cool.

Jared

Um uh actually, can I get all the way across the room?

Wylie

Um So you're gonna you're gonna move.

Jared

Well, I'm gonna open that door, but then I'm wondering if I can lock the door into here so this guy can't go anywhere.

Wylie

Um you probably could, but not on this.

Jared

Not I bonus action uh disengage with that alpha and all or no?

Wylie

That would help you disengage, but that wouldn't be an extra object interaction. Okay, you get one interaction per turn.

Jared

Yeah, that's uh uh I will disengage and go to the door preparing for that to happen.

Wylie

Okay, so you open this door and you're heading back towards the door that you guys came in.

Jared

Yep. To make sure that because that's the only other way in, correct?

Wylie

Yeah.

Jared

Cool. That's it.

Alan

Are the tentacles flossing or they look dead?

Wylie

Um so they just fell off. I'd say they're probably still rulers. So and four I rolled a D4 if four of them fell off. Four of them, okay. So there's four. And it's Gordon's turn.

Gordon

So, okay. So next to Nar there is a door that you have cracked open to the outside. Yes.

Wylie

And the negative 30-degree air is icing in. As well as some snow because storm start to take up.

Gordon

Uh okay, so my thought is uh I guess I go up to him and I want to grapple him to throw him out the door.

Wylie

Okay, it's gonna be a um opposed strength check.

Gordon

Advantage. Oh, well, yeah. Yep. Because I'm raging you're gonna get advantageous. I got a 19.

Wylie

Um, he rolled a two, so you definitely see him.

Gordon

Is he small?

Wylie

He's tiny. I imagine you just you put your big hand on his now tiny head and just kind of lift his and his little so you're not really touching the tentacles, and you're kind of and all the little tentacles are and you just you chuck him out the door.

Gordon

All right. Love it.

Wylie

Okay. Um, so you throw him out into the snow. At this time, um, Jared, you were going over to the door that you guys came in from. That door swings open. Java comes running through, holding that that pitcher that he had, his special artifact, and he says, I'm here, guys, I got it. And he sees the tentacles writhing on the floor and he runs up and he dumps acid onto them. And the tentacles fizzle and burn and disintegrate.

Java Script

And he and he says, I'm glad I made it here in time, guys.

Jared

It's the hero.

Wylie

And he looks so proud. He's got a hand on his hip, and he's and he's like, I told you guys this artifact was special.

Gordon

Now Gordon's like, oops. Just threw the guy out.

Wylie

Did you shut the door or did you leave the door open? It's open. Okay.

Gordon

Yeah, I just threw him out.

Wylie

Okay, so we'll say in initiative because he's out there. Um, that was Gordon's turn. Alan, you're up next.

Alan

Okay. Alan sees that and goes, Oh. Walks out to the entrance the door that's open.

Wylie

Okay, walk up to the door.

Alan

Am I within 30 feet of our cool. Uh I cast acid splash at Narzy tentacles coming out of him.

Wylie

Okay. Ooh, eleven.

Alan

Okay, you fail.

Wylie

Okay.

Alan

So you take two D6 of acid. That's awesome. One plus four. Five.

Wylie

Okay. Um, so five total. All right. You see any of the other tentacles that were sticking out of his body burn. Perfect. Um, sorry, Nar. Nar's tiny acid-covered body looks rough.

Alan

Yeah.

Wylie

Is looking rough out there in the cold. Okay. Um, that was Alan. And now it goes to Nar. Um, he's going to come towards the door, um, but he can't move very fast out there in the cold. The cold has the slowing effect on him. So he's trudging towards the door, but very, very cold. And that's the end of his turn. So, Jared.

Jared

Yeah, um, I'll come, I'll come back over to the door. Um, and I'm the exterior door? Yeah, he looks pretty rough, right? Yeah. Uh, I'm gonna do uh non-lethal and hit him in the back of the head.

Wylie

Okay. The front of the head because he's facing you?

Jared

Yes, the front of the head. Well, I'll I'll rotate around him because I'm so run outside? Yeah, I'll run outside and I'll rotate it around him. Okay. Uh so I can get advantage on this.

Wylie

Okay.

Jared

Uh 15 to hit?

Wylie

Hits.

Jared

Okay. And then I will not do fire damage. Uh, and it's non-lethal, but I still get sneak attack. Oh, that's so good. Oh my gosh. Sneak as egg is awesome. Um, I should play more rogues. Uh, that's 16 non-lethal slashing damage. He falls unconscious. Nice. Pop. Um, and then I'm like, can somebody help me? Uh Ram Shield, help me. Hey, big guy. Hey, big guy. Hey, the sun is setting. The sun is setting. I have red hair. I'm scared. Um, I'll be like, No, someone just starts saying uh it's like uh to remember, remember your macarons recipe. Macarons, macarons! And he starts his we're all breathing. Okay. Can you help me bring this guy in?

Gordon

Sure, sure, no problem.

Jared

What did you figure out? Did you figure out that we can like get the squid out of him or a Java?

Speaker 10

Yeah.

Wylie

You're speaking of Java?

Java Script

Um, Java says, um no, like, remember you guys left because the dogs were barky, and then like two minutes later you were screaming on the radios. Yeah. I just I just full panicked. I just got here

Jared

I'm crying.

Java Script

Um I haven't had a lot of time to do research yet because I was busy saving the day with my artifact.

Jared

I don't need that SAS right now. You've caught this guy up so much now. He's like, I am the hero.

Wylie

You told him he's a hero when he came in.

Java Script

He's like, it seems really important to come help you guys. And obviously it was.

Jared

Yeah, you did a great job.

Java Script

Maybe next time you guys go on an excursion, you should bring me to.

Jared

Well, do you want to be infected? Yeah, that's what I thought.

Java Script

infected with what? Seems like seems like someone got infected here. Yeah, exactly. Seems like maybe going somewhere else might be better.

Jared

All right. We'll talk about it later.

Gordon

Um I was like infected Heroism a bit.

Jared

Man, this guy's a pain.

Gordon

Um you created a narcissist. Yeah, exactly.

Jared

Um, we need to figure out a way to um save Nar, uh, or do we just kill Nar?

Wylie

Or like I'm like I'm like, I'm really out of it. Um Java looks out the door. Have you guys brought Nar back in? Okay, unconscious.

Jared

Keep the door open so the cold air is still pouring.

Wylie

Give him the cold. You gotta have it looking in in. Java's here now.

Java Script

Um he says, well, I need to do some research about how the acid affects the the cells of this creature, perhaps. So um uh maybe we could keep Dar in a cold place.

Jared

Yeah, we'll put him in one of the uh or just um outside the research lab.

Gordon

Okay, listen here. What we do is we get another bucket and we put him in the hot order.

Alan

I know you had a minute has passed at this point.

Wylie

Yeah, so at this point in Nar expanded. And he he was right by the door, so he's now half in, half out of the door. His head's out in the snow and his feet are in the kennel.

Jared

Well, we're going to need a bigger bucket, okay? Um, okay. Uh we uh Okay, I think the play is to take Nar out and put him outside in the cold um by the research lab.

Wylie

Right like the door right outside. Yeah.

Jared

Um So a storm is coming. Yeah, so we'll close this door. We're gonna go outside, or uh we'll drag him through the thing. To the snow? Yeah, through the snow. Okay outside.

Wylie

That's cool with you guys. So Java says, Alright, I'll beat you at the research lab. Cool. Okay. So heading to the research lab.

Jared

Cool. Oh man. That was stressful. I got hurt more by my allies than Nar.

Kipo

But put to sleep hit with a pan

Wylie

I don't think Nar was able to do any damage to anyone. Yeah.

Jared

I I have 15 HP and I started at 21 because so glad you weren't using your battle axe.

Gordon

Yeah, yeah, that's a good thing.

Jared

Yeah.

Wylie

Okay. Okay. So Java's gonna do some research. Um, you could probably take a short rest and use some hit die if you would like. Um and what do you guys do while Java is doing research? I'm gonna say he needs an hour to do research.

Jared

Um I pick up my uh or I'll can I grab my uh I'll be like, hey, can I have my uh knife back? Sure, sure. You you can have your knife back. Thank you. Um and I will go uh eat lunch. Or dinner. Dinner. Yeah, dinner, yeah.

Wylie

Dinner, which is just instant. It's instant.

Gordon

The gumbo's ready. Yeah, the gumbo. It's instant gumbo, but it's ready.

Wylie

Because you were just playing overcooked the whole time.

Speaker 1

Yeah.

Wylie

It was overcooked on Switch. It just gonna be so funny if Gordon has a little Nintendo Switch just hanging out on Arcane Switch.

Gordon

Yeah, yeah. There you go.

Wylie

Um Okay, so um I assume while Jared's resting, he's probably keeping an eye on Nara's body, seeing if he regains consciousness, but being knocked unconscious and in the cold.

Jared

Yep.

Wylie

There's nothing really happening. So Java does some research. Um, Gordon finishes dinner. Um and so do you guys want to do your dinner time team meeting or do you want to discuss research in the research lab?

Jared

Well, I have to talk to Pyra.

Gordon

Right, I know. There's another like meeting.

Jared

So Yeah. Do you guys want to do research and I'll do Pyra meeting? You guys want to split up more? Or we can bring Pyra in here and just do the meeting with Pyra.

Wylie

Yeah. Yeah. Or you or you could do research meeting, dinner, and then, you know, because we'll probably need to figure out.

Jared

Older at eight o'clock. We can't push it up. Well, you could push up a little bit,

Gordon

but she's pretty excited.

Alan

Yeah, she is. And that we actually get to do it. Mention that, yeah, you get to blow up some stuff. Yeah, she'll be right over cool on it.

Jared

Um sweet. I will uh uh do that. We'll have the meeting and then uh uh we'll have the meeting in the research uh area because I want to show her the the tape too.

Wylie

Okay, okay, cool. Awesome. Okay, so do you radio Pyra to come join you?

Jared

Yeah, but Pyra, got some great news for ya. Um our meetings moved up, and maybe explosives moved up further.

Pyra Ember

All right, very good. Where are we meeting? Uh research lab in ten minutes. Alright, is there food?

Jared

I'm eating gumbo as we speak.

Wylie

Okay. So I I imagine uh Gordon brings his crock pot of gumbo.

Gordon

He's got his rice and his gumbo.

Jared

Nice. This is so good. I can't believe it's insta. That's crazy.

Gordon

No, no, you don't know.

Pyra Ember

Oh it would be better if he had the right spices.

Gordon

All right. Um you're trying to get a little bit of that jelly to throw in there. Oh, okay.

Java Script

And Java sees this and he's like, Oh, I wouldn't do that if I were you.

Gordon

Okay, if you say so. Sold a wrong with spice.

Wylie

Java's like, I'll tell you one second. So as you dive into the meeting, um, in this hour of research, um, Java says, All right, here's the things that I've determined.

Java Script

This purple jelly is the same substance as these mushrooms and tentacles. So it seems to be a sort of liquefied form of the same cells. On a microscopic level, it's exactly the same thing. Um, but this jelly is also still a little bit alive in some ways. Um it's like the X, it's uh paralyzed.

Jared

A full person. You're in a full person. And I just wanna I'm saying that out loud. You ate a full person.

Java Script

Um so the the the bad thing is you did eat something that was alive. The good thing is we have acid in our stomach. Nice. And I do believe the acid seems to destroy this creature completely. Um, in my research, it is immune to fire damage. Oh but it does not like the cold at all. Um, you said this came from uh caverns, and in the research notes it seems that it likes warm and humid environment. So it's not meant to survive on the tundra. It will not get far out here. Um so that's a good thing.

Jared

Cool.

Java Script

Um the bad thing is these cells seem to replicate and be able to mimic other cells, um, like the cells of other creatures. So that is part of the problem that we're having with gnar, is it seems that the cells from this creature have gotten into gnar and are mimicking and controlling gnar cells. Aaron Powell Okay.

Jared

So how do we destroy the cells and like split that?

Java Script

Well, acid does seem to fully destroy this creature.

Jared

Okay. So we're just gonna give them an acid bath.

Alan

Thank goodness it's a cantrip. Acid split. Acid splash. Yeah.

Jared

Acid bath the cantrip. Acid bath. Yes.

Java Script

But I am worried that it will be hard to destroy the monster's cells and not NARS cells. Yeah. Because acid just that is splashed from my amazing pitcher, um, or from Dr. Fizzard here, because he is quite a powerful wizard. With this cantrip.

Jared

He's actually asleep in his chair.

Alan

That's when that is what he's doing. Yeah, he's a sleeping chairwind. He got it back. Yeah, he's an out full. Yeah.

Wylie

He's been asleep the entire meeting.

Jared

Um so um so Nart's dead. We're just gonna gum up. We're in.

Java Script

Um maybe with more time I could figure out a better application for acid. Um, maybe a more stable.

Jared

Yeah, can we like drink for something?

Java Script

Um, I would not advise drinking it at this time, but um as I could maybe continue to look at the notes, I might have a bit more of an answer for you. Um it is difficult because it seems that when um the host body is dead, that this creature may split off into other pieces.

Jared

Whoa. Um is there like uh how many other pieces?

Java Script

Well, it's hard to say. I mean it seems like NARS here, but um like when you cut off the tentacles, yeah. And they were still moving and things. Okay.

Jared

So I'm just curious, because if NARS infected, who else is infected? That's kind of what I'm thinking about in the in the area as a security issue.

Java Script

Um That is a good question.

Jared

Is there any way to like tell if somebody's been infected or not? Man.

Java Script

I mean Nar started what did you see about Nar? Was he? H

Jared

He didn't, he wasn't lazy. So that was kind of that's kind of a hint.

Java Script

Right, I'm a little out of character. Yeah.

Jared

You got angry. That's a little out of character. Are you infected?

Gordon

I did eat the jelly. No, no, no. I feel just fine.

Java Script

I know I wouldn't eat any more because the stomach acid, that's just a hypothesis. Obviously, I can't really test it uh until we've had further observation. So maybe don't put it on your toast or anything though.

Jared

But okay, so we uh I'm gonna turn the pyra I'm gonna be like I know how much you love TNT. Oh, they're immune to fire. So can we make like an acid grenade or something like that?

Pyra Ember

She and she's well I don't have very much acid. I don't have any acid.

Jared

I have dynamite, I have We have an infinity gulp of acid.

Pyra Ember

You have an infinite gulf of acid.

Jared

Well, we do have an infinite gulp of acids. The 7-Eleven acid. Infinite gulp.

Pyra Ember

Alright, where'd you get this thing?

Jared

Um, and I point at the And Java's holding it proudly.

Java Script

It's the thing we found on top of the snow that you said was just trash.

Jared

Hey, hey, that's enough of the sas. Or else we're gonna take you off this project, alright? You need to lock in over here, buddy.

Java Script

But I'm gonna roll with being right.

Jared

Yeah, I know. And then when you're not, you're gonna get us all killed. Like the stomach acid thing. Put it down. Slaps.

Speaker 1

Yes, no.

Wylie

Gordon was putting it on a cracker with some brie.

Speaker 1

Yeah, yeah. No.

Java Script

Oh, that's not a charcuterie tray.

Gordon

It's a clipboard.

Jared

Um, okay. Alright, let's um let's see if we can make like uh acid bombs and then blow up the other base, because that's kind of what where we gotta do. Um and then we should also maybe have a uh having a dinner meeting also, and then keep our eyes out and see if anybody's acting a little suspicious. And Pyra says h so many meetings. You know, I get it. I'm really coming around to everybody.

Pyra Ember

All right, so I work on bomb?

Jared

You work on big boom. All right, big boom. It needs to be big enough to destroy the base that we were in.

Speaker 10

And the cavern below. And the cav. Oh my cool cavern or just cave in? No, everything.

Jared

Get it all gone. Nuclear bomb symbols floating around her head. Like when we hair in her eyes, she's light up.

Java Script

Um, and and Java pipes it, um, we might need to notify the Gnomish and Dwarven Alliance. Um they're not, I mean, communications are down because of the storm, but uh, we do need to try to reach out because they will not be happy.

Jared

Cool. Um if we just blew up the write a letter. Sends it in the mail. All right. Uh I will send out that uh thing and I'll put it on loop so the next time somebody uh comes, it'll be like, hey, this is what's going on.

Wylie

Okay, so you do a broadcast mess message.

Jared

Yep. Okay. Nice. Um just not to the so they don't know.

Wylie

Okay.

Jared

The base can't hear it.

Wylie

Yeah, it's like broadcasting back to your base, your your um Arcane intelligence who it establishes it. So your contact there, you're sending out a message. So you use your message thing to send, you don't get a response at this time. Yep.

Jared

But it's on loop, so even if I'm not if like even if we go down, everybody knows what's going on. So even when they teleport in, they know what's up. Uh and acid is really effective, all that jazz, like everything that we've learned.

Wylie

Okay. Um, so you can't send all of that in one message.

Jared

Okay.

Wylie

So you you'd be limited. So what would be the like high point like overview that you can send back to arcane intelligence?

Jared

Uh the ability and uh that they can copy people and that there is like a uh entity that is copying people and that is vulnerable to acid and uh like basically all the facts as immune to fire, vulnerable to acid. Yep. Um and can copy people's mannerisms and become part of their cell cells. And when they die, they split off. Be very careful. Cold temperatures.

Wylie

Yes, cold temperatures slow and restrained.

Jared

Yep.

Wylie

Okay.

unknown

Cool.

Wylie

Awesome. Okay. So I think that we will regroup with your team meeting in our next episode.

Speaker 1

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