Blunders and Dragons

[Bonus] "That Thing We Found" Part 5/5

Blunders and Dragons LLC Season 1 Episode 7

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Wylie

Hey friends, thanks for listening to our episodes so far. This is the final episode of our one shot That Thing We Found. But don't worry, the adventures aren't over yet. We have an entire season coming very soon. So please like, rate, review, follow, subscribe so you don't miss anything. You can also follow us for free on our Patreon to stay up to date with our news. If you subscribe for $5 a month, you will get access to character art, maps, ad-free episodes, as well as behind the blunders, our behind the scenes chat episodes. This is episode of 5 of our more than one shot.

Kipo

Our five shot. It's a five shot.

Wylie

Five episodes, multiple weekends. Hopefully, this will be the finale. All right.

Brad

We got it.

Alan

If we had any more jelly.

Wylie

So our characters, you guys were in the research lab last time. Um, Java had revealed some interesting discoveries for you. The purple jelly is, in fact, some of the same biological substance as the mushroom octopus that you have found. Um, you guys learned that these mushroom octopus are capable of body snatching. Poor GNar has been taken over by one of these weird creatures. You were able to knock him unconscious and stick him out in the snow. But he probably will be waking up soon, and the storm is the storm is hitting right now. Um, so you guys are in the research lab. You had a meeting with Pyra about um blowing up the other base.

Mimir

Oh, wow.

Wylie

We're gonna hear the wind raging outside, the snow pounding against the that's in our waking up.

Jared

Oh my gosh! What's happening? Acid it everywhere, my eyes! sorry.

Wylie

Um, so you guys are gonna have to head to the kitchen over the team meeting and figure out how you're gonna get back to Istid Jokul and what you're going to do. Um, it seems like you've determined that you need to blow up that base.

Mimir

Yeah, I mean, yeah, we're pretty excited about that. We're instructed. Making, yeah, we're making an acid nuke, basically, is what I've described to Pyra. So we'll see what that what that actually turns out. Um, but um basically the meeting is all gonna be jibble jabble, um, but we want to make sure that no one else has been taken over. That's the objective of the meeting. Okay. We're all I'm we have like a secret team meeting here in the lab, and I'll be like, all right, everybody keep your eyes locked in, locked on, and focused up, okay? So maybe make sure that if anybody's acting weird, even one of us is acting weird. I'm looking at uh a ram shield as like I just awkwardly stare at everybody in the room.

Jared

Alright, I think we're pretty good in here. Alright, um perfect. Uh and then we have more jambalaya, so that's gonna be good. Um and so it's gumbo.

Pyra

He's the one that was you're right, he said it was gumbo. He doesn't he should know this.

Gordon

There is something wrong with him.

Pyra

Uh, which is better, jumbo gumbo or jambalaya?

Gordon

Um I would say my mother's recipe of gumbo is better.

Wylie

Than jambalaya.

Gordon

Than jambalaya, but jambalaya is still good.

Pyra

I like jambalaya, has the shrimps.

Gordon

True, it can.

Jared

Alright, guys, we got we got body snatchers here.

Wylie

All right. Um Java has been tuning out part of this meeting because you guys have been taught spending a lot of time talking about soup and rice.

Mimir

Yes.

Wylie

And um he um raises his hand.

Mimir

Yes.

Wylie

Um, he was the one who discovered last time that you have this pitcher that allowed you to um dump acid, the um infinite gulp, the 7-Eleven infinite gulp. Um and so and that worked to destroy the tentacles, which is the only thing you've seen, mostly you've seen them get severed. Yeah. And then they kind of like animate on them on their own, and it seems to be creating almost more of a problem. So he found out that acid works. So he's been studying that research journal. And you do remember that at the Istid Jokul base, they had dug up a um a gelatinous cube. Oh. And um, so he points out,

Java Script

uh, guys, this is just a little bit of a theory, but we were discussing how to get this creature out of Gnar. And I think there could be a possibility that we could use the gelatinous cube because it does acid damage, but slowly. And if he were encased in the acid temporarily, we might be able to separate the cells of this creature from Gnar.

Jared

Yeah, and there was that ankle bone, right? So did they already try that? Uh I'll relay. I'll be like, there were there was an ankle bone in the thing, and then I'm wondering if they've already tried that and it worked, or I'm not totally sure.

Java Script

They didn't say anything on the holo disc that you retrieved. So I don't know if they used it for that. But it might be that they just put the sub-wizard there, they didn't quite get about in time to save his foot.

Gordon

But did you try side C? Because there was side A, side B.

Java Script

I didn't even know.

Gordon

Did it go all the way to Z? Like what's not?

Java Script

Well, maybe Dr. Fizzard would know because he knew that we should flip it. Dr. Fizzard? Huh? Huh? Dr. Fizzard. Yes. Um, uh is there any more info in this hollow disc? You know, we had the one side with the video finding the cube, and then we had the second side with the lady that said we should blow up the the base. Is there anything else?

Alan

Not not unless any of this stuff has changed since the six months I was gone, and Sandy was nagging at me, and I oh gosh, I remember now. I was just sitting at home. I really

Jared

Alright, Dr. Fizzridge. All right, thank you for that info. I think we've all lost our mind equally.

Java Script

Dr. Fizzard, I like your stories.

Alan

You're a good kid.

Java Script

I'm really glad you're back.

Jared

All right. Well, let's head to the kitchen. All right, I mean keep an eye out.

Java Script

Um, so we notify everybody on the walkie-talkies that we're having a meeting in the kitchen.

Jared

Yeah, usually, you know, it's they don't listen to the they don't listen to me. Um I'll be like, all right, we're having a meeting uh in the kitchen. Uh we got extra snacks this time.

Gordon

Actually, yeah, that's uh Gordon would just come on and say, uh, I am serving dessert uh in the kitchen for our meeting.

Wylie

And actually the only team member that is not with you is Bo Jangles. Because um So we're all gonna stare at Bo Jangles and be like Well, Pyra was away from you guys for a while. Yeah. Um and and um Java was away from you guys for a while too. Sure. Um and so also what are you gonna do with Nar?

Jared

I don't know. Uh uh I'll tie him up and yeah, but then he turned to jelly last time I we tied. Oh no, that's because he died. Not Nar, but the other dude.

Wylie

The uh the dwarf attacked initially, he died, and you tied him up in your office and he was gone. You don't know exactly what happened to him because Mops, your uh automated vacuum, had cleaned up a lot of jelly.

Jared

So um I will tie up Nar. Okay. Um uh extra well with our handcuffs and things. Uh not handcuff myself to him.

Mimir

Um that's the biggest uh thing. Um and make sure his keys are taken off his body.

Wylie

Okay, so Nar has no keys, he's tied up. Are you bringing him with you to the kitchen or are you leaving him outside in the snow?

Jared

I mean we'll we'll leave him in the research area because he's gonna die and if he just stays out in the snow, right?

Gordon

Oh, I mean with the storm.

Jared

Yeah.

Gordon

Yeah.

Jared

Um, we could bring him to the kitchen. Oh, just bring him up. I'd bring him to the kitchen. Okay. Okay. I can't wait to explain that to everybody. Hey, we have Nar tied up because he's an alien.

Gordon

Also, might tell us of their reaction. Yeah.

Jared

Oh man, that's so bad. Bop, bop, bop. All right.

Wylie

Okay. Um, so you guys are gonna head to the kitchen from the research lab. And so um, you're not gonna be able to go outside because this, I mean, you could go outside, but I don't think you want to go through the storm. So you guys are gonna have to pass through the greenhouse biosphere on your way to the kitchen. So um Bo Jangles radioed back and he said, All right, I'll be there real soon for some cookies. He's ready for some dessert. Um, so you guys are gonna head through the biosphere. So let's bring up the biosphere because we haven't gotten even to look at that map yet. So this is the map of our super cool biosphere. It's circular, uh, obviously, because it's a sphere. And um, it's got big, really thick glass windows around the whole thing to let in whatever sunlight you can get up here in the Arctic. And it's very warm. There's gardens all around the perimeter, there's paths that work their way through, um, kind of circular, like sort of like spokes on a tire that extend amongst the gardens with all of their lights and hydroponic systems. And then in the very center is the chicken coop. And Gordon has named these chickens.

Gordon

Yes, we have Betty Sue. We have uh, I believe uh I just forgot their names, so no Betty Sue. They're they're all named Betty Sue. This is Betty Sue 1, this is Betty Sue 2, Betty Sue three. They're just a bunch of white chickens, so they all have to. There's a Hank. Hank the tank. Hank is uh he is the rooster. Uh sometimes we we have little we have little skirmishes. He he can be a little rude. Uh but but deep down, Hank. I I like Hank. Oh, he's still fun.

Wylie

And um did didn't you have one named um Ohio?

Gordon

There is uh Ohio, there is Skibbity.

Wylie

Same as the dog, so it gets really confusing.

Gordon

Yes, yes, it's it's very, very confusing. Yes, and then there is uh there there is toilet. We we don't talk about toilet. Toilet keeps to himself and yeah, we just don't talk about him.

Wylie

So as you guys um step on into the biosphere, um you know, it looks beautiful like it normally does and warm, but standing.

Gordon

No picture of a chicken just came up on the screen in the certain memory at home. A massive one now, too, yeah.

Wylie

He's he's standing this is uh the camera angle is you know down low on the ground, so he's not a giant chicken. He's not a giant chicken, but there there's a normal large white chicken, nor large chicken, you know, not like a human-sized chicken. There's a normal but large chicken standing in the center of the path, staring at you. And um, Gordon, you can definitely see this is absolutely Hank. Um, and so he's standing staring at you in the center of the trail in the biosphere as your group as well as tied up and unconscious gnar are dragging your way through the biosphere.

Gordon

Okay, everybody, be careful, Hank. Uh sometimes he can be kind of temperamental. He does have spurs and he will spur you. Uh just be careful. Uh, I mean he can gouge pretty deeply, so protect your eyes. Uh, although typically he's probably going for their ankles.

Jared

So uh I got this. Don't worry. Excuse me, sir, put your feathers up. And I pull out my crossbow. This is not a drill.

Gordon

No, no, no. You you need to not look, do not look at it.

Jared

Don't tell me, don't tell me how to do my job. I'm gonna rush him.

Wylie

Are you gonna give me an animal handling check or are you gonna rush him?

Jared

I'm gonna rush him. I'm gonna attack Hank.

Wylie

Okay, attack Hank.

Jared

Not bad. 21 to hit Hank.

Wylie

Um you hit Hank.

Jared

A sweep.

Wylie

How much damage do you do?

Gordon

Oh, quite a bit. What would you say the chicken is under the surprise condition?

Wylie

Uh I wouldn't say he's surprised because you charged at him while yelling.

Jared

Yeah, no, okay. I only do five slashing damage. Um I'm on edge. I'm like, this is the most on edge you've ever seen, Jerry. Yeah, yeah. Everything that stands in our way is an enemy of the state.

Wylie

Oh. Um how much you just do what?

Jared

I do five slashing damage.

Wylie

Do five. Okay. Um so you do five slashing damage. The uh chicken flutters up into the air, and you slash at him. Um you take off a foot, and he's fluttered up in the air, and a tentacle extends.

Gordon

Not Hank!

Mimir

I love the idea that um Jared was actually just expecting to fight a chicken.

Jared

And so he's now panicking. He's like, oh no, it's actually a swim.

Wylie

So let's roll for initiative.

Gordon

Yeah. Nat 20.

Mimir

Whoa!

Jared

11 for me.

Wylie

Gordon is gonna be going first.

Alan

18 for me.

Wylie

Okay, so we've got Gordon first, and 18 for Alan.

Jared

Okay. And 11 for me.

Wylie

Okay. So we've got Gordon first, Alan second, chicken thing, uh third, and then Jared fourth. Gordon, you're up.

Jared

Put your chicken feathers up, you're under arrest, mister. I'm having flashbags of being grappled again.

Gordon

Where are we? Okay, where is uh Hank in comparison to where I'll put you guys on the map. Whoops.

Jared

If they wanted to see this map, how would they be able to see this map, DM?

Wylie

These maps are gonna be available for you to see on our Patreon when we make it. They're very but at the time of this episode, if you're listening to it, we should have these available on our Patreon. And after this one-shot campaign, we are we have a whole much longer campaign planned. Um, and so if you subscribe, you will be able to see all of the cool graphics from that campaign, as well as our behind the blunders episodes that we'll be releasing on there as well.

Jared

So much content coming out, so much fun coming out.

Wylie

I know I'm really excited for that one too. I'm gonna be sad to leave these characters though, they're pretty awesome. But it'll be whole new characters, whole new adventure. A lot of fun. Okay, I'm just gonna put you three, but technically, Java and Pyra are with you guys too.

Brad

Okay.

Wylie

And I got to get little chicken out now.

Gordon

Okay, so since we're in the biosphere, and you said it's just uh what are the walls made of?

Wylie

Glass.

Gordon

Glass. Okay.

Wylie

So I'm gonna say Jared is right up here. Um who would be would Alan be next? Yeah.

Gordon

Yeah. So I think what Gordon just noticing, like the best way to deal with these things is when everything is cold. So Gordon is actually gonna run up to the wall and then just go ham on it with his uh battle axe.

Wylie

So he's uh you're gonna take the chicken to the wall or Oh, you're gonna go you smash the wall. You're gonna smash a hole in the wall.

Gordon

Unless is there are there any Wait, what? Y

Jared

You're gonna smash our bio dome? Yeah. So if there's uh Can I yell at him?

Wylie

You can if you see him heading for it.

Jared

Don't do that. Stop that. It's just a chicken, it's a chicken squid. Don't break our biodome. This is so expensive. This is more than anybody has ever been paid ever.

Gordon

Okay, so um are or are there any windows? Or I'd say like windows you can open, or are they all just like totally sealed?

Wylie

Okay. So Arcane Intelligence built this and they are not used to a super cold environment. So while they did make the glass really thick, they probably would have considered it advantageous to be able to open the windows. So I'm gonna roll a luck check.

Gordon

So you can So 100% I don't think Gordon would check. He would probably just run up and you wouldn't know if there was windows. That's true, that's true.

Wylie

All right, because you this is this is like your zone.

Gordon

I I enjoy this place, yeah.

Wylie

So I'm gonna let you um you can pick odds or evens, and I'm gonna roll a d20. And if it's what you pick, then there will be a window, and you don't have to actually break the dome because this is very thick glass, so shattering it will take time.

Gordon

Okay. All right. Um let's go. Odds.

Wylie

Okay, odds.

Gordon

Because it's an odd situation.

Wylie

Three.

Gordon

Let's go.

Wylie

Arcane Intelligence thought you would want to open windows to the negative 30 degree weather that is consistently that cold or colder.

Gordon

Yeah.

Jared

That's why they're that's why it's the bosses.

Gordon

So where where where would the uh where would the window be?

Wylie

I'd say the first row, because these are this is glass windows that go all the way up across the dome. So the first row, the normal, accessible, so probably all the way around you have windows that can open.

Gordon

So then uh Gordon just kind of runs off to the left uh out of line with everyone and just goes and uh opens a window. Okay. Open a window. I'm assuming that would just be my action.

Wylie

Mm-hmm. Yeah. If you have any bonus actions, if you want a bonus action rage or anything like that.

Gordon

It's only one chicken. It's only that we know of. Well, there's more. How much? Nah, I'll I'll save it.

Alan

How much does the chicken weigh?

Wylie

How much does it weigh? Uh how much does an average chicken weigh? Hang on. I'll Google it.

Gordon

Is it enough to break the ice?

Mimir

I don't want to be here anymore. This is my last uh time on the podcast. Uh I'm retiring. My mirrors are just like, I'm out. I'll play myself out.

Wylie

Well, if there's any um chicken lovers in our fans, they're probably gonna be disappointed in me. But it seems like they it can vary greatly between just like 1.4 pounds and like 8.6 pounds.

Alan

Oh, well, that's just perfect. So anyway.

Wylie

What does Alan do?

Gordon

Uh well we've all started blasting.

Wylie

Oh, you're it's not your turn. Yeah, hang on. I'm losing track. I'm getting so excited about this chicken. All right, we crashed a window open, and that's all you do, right?

Gordon

Yep.

Wylie

Okay, then it is Alan.

Gordon

I just opened a window.

Wylie

You opened a window that can be closed again later. Yes.

Alan

Uh can you responsibly. Tell me distances. So I see myself in the middle there. How far is it to the wall where the window is, and how far away is the chicken?

Wylie

I'd say it looks like it's about I don't know. It seems like it's fifteen feet each way.

unknown

Oh, perfect. That's on you, DM. That's on you.

Alan

I cast mage hand. Okay. Pick up Hank by his good leg.

Wylie

Okay, I think you're gonna have to do grapple. Like a grapple check. Yeah.

Gordon

Five.

Jared

It'd be ten. Uh so it'd be just a flat roll, I think.

Gordon

It was so close.

Wylie

What did you get?

Gordon

Um, let me see if I add anything. Do I add strength to the I mean?

Wylie

I think because it's a hand, we're going flat rolls. Okay. Yeah. The chicken rolled a three. Let's go!

Alan

It wasn't, and it has a it was on 17, and then it went right over to seven okay. Well, out the window.

Wylie

Okay, you grab the chicken, you thrust the chicken out the window into the snow.

Alan

Yep.

Wylie

Um, and do you do anything like your mage hand is out there in the snow?

Gordon

Drops it.

Wylie

Drops it. Okay. Anything else happened?

Gordon

Real quick, how far out do you go? As far as I can. So that's if it's 15, the range is 30. Okay. So you went.

Wylie

You went fifteen and then another 15.

Gordon

15 and then but a 15 back to me and then 15 out and then 15 again. So it's if it's 30 feet away from me, then that make that checks out.

Wylie

Oh, you're just saying, okay, okay, okay.

Gordon

15 to pick him up, back to me, 15. So once I'm in the middle, I'm in the middle, and Hank is right there.

Wylie

Okay.

Gordon

So it will say you can cast it at the like 60 feet away from me.

Wylie

You can cast it at the chicken.

Jared

Yeah, yeah.

Wylie

So does it say how much movement that hand has per round?

Jared

Yeah, I think it's oh, I don't know. Let me let me look real quick.

Alan

Uh you can move the hand up to 30 feet each time you use it. Oh, there you go.

Wylie

Okay. So if you casted the chicken, you can basically get the chicken to the window.

Gordon

To the window.

Wylie

So the chicken is grasped in a mage hand at the window. At the window. Gordon is next to the window. Um, and that's also right next to Java, who's holding his arcane pitcher. And Pyra is right there as well. But I didn't put them in the initiative. Um, but we'll let them insert once every round if you guys ask them to do something. Cool. Um okay. So much.

unknown

Okay.

Alan

Just have a floating chicken.

Wylie

A floating chicken. Upside down. In front of the window.

Gordon

In front of the window.

Wylie

In front of the window, clearly on his way out. Um, so it is now the chicken thing's turn.

Mimir

Got higher initiative than me.

Wylie

So the chicken over here. Um, he is going to. I think you can struggle against being grappled. So let me check. Okay. So I think it just has to resist again. So it'll be a roll off of just a straight roll.

Jared

How are we going over there?

Wylie

Chicken roll to 17. Okay, the chicken hops out of the um hand, but that was its action. So it is sitting on the floor next to the window with tentacles for legs.

Jared

Cool. I love to see that.

Wylie

And it is now Jared's turn.

Jared

Cool. I will run up uh and grab the infinite gulp. Okay. Um, and say acid into it and dump it onto the chicken.

Wylie

Okay. So you just dump acid straight onto the chicken.

Gordon

Actually, just kivas comes out.

unknown

No!

Brad

Don't waste the cavass. Oh no.

Jared

I said acid, I said acid.

Wylie

So fortunately, Java also had already had it set to acid because he was using it for acid earlier. So you just pour acid out of this cool arcane pitcher with all these glowing runes on it. Um, they glow green, as you say, acid. You pour it over the chicken. Um, there's a whoosh of the acid, and all that's left is the chicken skeleton standing there charred. And everything else has been liquefied away.

unknown

All right.

Gordon

Oh, poor Hank. Good job, guys. And uh, we had our fights. We had our fights, but we had our good times. So for Hank, I would just like to say maybe just take a moment of silence, please. Uh he is he is uh now at one with the chicken pin in the sky and uh may he rest in peace.

Alan

Alan's finicking with his radio and it's making all sorts of like in the middle of this drum sentence.

Jared

You've had it off this whole time. Um I have an idea, DM.

Wylie

Uh-huh.

Jared

I want to go to the dog pen and grab Finn. Okay. Put Finn on a leash and bring him Finn to the meeting. Okay.

Brad

That's a great idea.

Wylie

All right. So um you guys are currently dragging Kolepsy with you. So who's gonna go where?

Mimir

Uh I'll go to Finn and go with Finn. You have Nar since you're big. Yeah.

Wylie

Okay.

Gordon

So with the other NPCs, I think. Okay.

Wylie

So Jared's going to the dog kennels. Um, everyone else is continuing to the kitchen together, or is anyone else gonna do any side missions on the way to the kitchen?

Alan

Hang on. There's still a bunch of chickens.

Wylie

There's a lot of chickens.

Gordon

I mean, I'll I'll keep walking through and check on Betty Sue and P Sue one and two and three and four and five and six.

Wylie

Um so um, do you give the acid back to Java or is someone else gonna carry it?

Mimir

Well, yeah. I mean I'll give it back to Java.

Wylie

Okay.

Mimir

Um pretty slippery, so I can just yeah.

Wylie

Yeah, so imagine when you hand it to Java, he goes, he holds it, he's like, don't worry, guys, I'll lead the way. And he steps out in front of the group holding the acid pitcher, just like ready to dump it on any chicken. All right, so he's gonna go do that. You guys are gonna head to the kitchen.

Mimir

Right.

Wylie

Um, while we're doing that, um can everybody give me a constitution save and a D100.

Mimir

Uh I will say, probably going alone is not a good idea. So, because if I get trapped with one of these individuals by myself, so I'll take um Alan with me. I can take Alan or Pyra or do not take me.

Alan

You can say you you tell me what to do.

Wylie

Well, you guys are already separated off. Oh, okay. So you're I'll radio and I'll be like, hey, can I get one more person coming over helping out with the dog pens? Okay. I think Bo Jangles being already separated off. He would say, um, all right, sure thing, I'll meet you on over there. Perfect. And I know I still need to get you something, Brad. Okay, so now we're gonna Okay, I'm trying to figure out which map to bring up. I think we can just go get the kitchen.

Mimir

What hey, what are we giggling? Hey, what are we giggling out of the way? We'll find out. Brad's dying.

Jared

Brad's giggling. That's uh nervous.

Wylie

I think we have arcadium sickness in our own studio early taking effect. Um okay, so uh Bo Jangles comes to you in the dog kennel. Um as you guys he meets you there, you're there at the same time, as you enter. Um, Finn is not happy. He starts growling, and he he seems really irritated. The other dogs seem on edge. Um, but Finn seems really alert and aggressive. Do you continue in there to get him, or what do you want to do?

Jared

Uh is Bo Jingles in there with me?

Wylie

Yeah, you both entered at the same time.

Jared

Okay. Um, let's see. I will like you feeling okay there, Joe Bo Jangles? Uh I'll just talk to him real quick.

Wylie

Okay. Um he's like, all right, then um, yeah, I've been working real hard all day, so I'm pretty tired, but um, I'm doing alright. There's some weird stuff going on.

Jared

Oh that doesn't seem great.

Alan

Um, what's your name?

Mimir

Let's see.

Jared

Uh I'll be like, uh, one second, yeah. Um and I'll be like, we're on our way with the dogs. Or with the dog. We'll meet you guys there soon. Uh and then I will leave without the dogs. I think that's probably the best thing.

Wylie

And just meet everybody back in the kitchen together.

Jared

Uh-huh.

Wylie

Okay. Um, so you guys are heading.

Jared

I got to mute this thing.

Wylie

We're just trying to clarify stuff.

Jared

Asking questions.

Wylie

I can't send too confusing prompts. All right. So we go to the kitchen. So everyone's gonna meet in the kitchen now. Oh, good. All the icons are there from last time. Oh, here we go. I was like, the chicken's not supposed to be in the kitchen.

Mimir

Not that we know of.

Wylie

Don't worry. You step into the kitchen and there are chickens everywhere. No, not really the.

Jared

That's my worst night.

Wylie

That would be so funny.

Brad

Over chicken loaded.

Wylie

Over chicken loaded.

Gordon

All the chickens are playing overcooked.

Jared

No, they took the switch.

Gordon

There's a spell called on and off, and I think that would be really funny to call the instead of a switch, call it an on and off.

Wylie

An on and off. I like that. Well, maybe we'll get sponsored by Nintendo. Yeah. Switchs is for everyone.

Jared

Sponsor people, Nintendo.

Wylie

Okay, so um Gnar. Oh, I need to put Nar in here. He's unconscious and on the floor.

Gordon

So something, if if you don't mind me saying for Gordon, something that I think he would do at this moment and just understanding the thing that's been going on. I think he is probably gonna go to the freezer and pull out um ice cream for everyone.

Wylie

Okay.

Gordon

Um just uh because you know, this guy, I mean again, food. That's his thing. So he pulls out ice cream to serve for everybody.

Wylie

All right. Um so he serves you you put it and do you like hand each person a bowl? Do you just put it out for everyone to serve themselves? What do you do?

Gordon

Um he would probably serve it up and then hand it out to people.

Wylie

Okay. All right, so you describe who you're passing it to when.

Gordon

I wonder. We'll see. Um I would go ahead, I would probably start with Pyra. He's like, oh, here you go, here is your bowl of ice cream. Because you know, I said desserts, so here you go. Um and then he'd walk over to um Java. Like, here you go. I know you like uh more of the coffee kind of thing, so here is the Java chip. Oh, if you like. Uh also Pyra has a little bit of a spicy, you know, because she likes explosives. Uh Alan, I go to him, I give him uh this is for you, Alan. What is it? Uh it's just plain vanilla, like you. In a what? In a bowl. Okay.

Wylie

Alan's rolling dice.

Alan

Okay, yeah, he just takes it. Okay. Oh no.

Gordon

Oh no. But as Gordon's walking, he goes, does anybody smell that? There's something stinky. I don't Alan fart. Alan smells the ice cream. I think I think Alan farted. Okay, anyway.

Jared

All right. Thank you so much for the ice cream.

Gordon

Here you go, Jared. This is your ice cream. Awesome. Uh it's just uh, you know, it's got a little hint, a little flavor. Um, but you know, just kind of in the in the background. Uh, and then uh here you go, Bo. Uh you're a hardworking man, so I give you uh chocolate chip, chocolate chip cookie dough.

Wylie

Okay. Bo Jingles takes it and um he goes, Oh, thank you. It's been a real long day. And he takes a spoonful and puts his mouth, he goes, and he makes a screwed-up face, and he goes, brain freeze. Thanks. And he takes another bite. The same thing happens.

Jared

And he's like, You don't have to eat like a we're not forcing you a gunpoint to eat ice cream.

Wylie

He's like, I have to get into bite, let it. Um, sorry, I'm going gnar. Java.

Beau Jangles

Um, I'll think I'll need to let it warm up a little bit first. It might be a little bit too cold for me. And he sets the bowl down and and says, All right, how about this team meeting? What are we here to talk about?

Jared

I I uh set my bowl down and I go up to the whiteboard and I'm like,

Gordon

hello, some somebody keeps farting. I don't know who it is. I need to stop because I keep smelling it, okay? I I don't know. Whoever whoever uh this if you dealt it, please claim it, okay? Um for the sake of everyone.

Jared

Well we've had a very uh interesting situation here. Uh besides that, that we'll put that on the very last. Um and I want uh everybody, um we are walking down the base, um, and we want everybody to go to uh uh their designated areas, and we're gonna come around with a dog, um, and we're gonna have a conversation, all right? So everybody's gonna be in their own areas with and we're gonna come around uh by me. Uh me and Bo Jangles will walk around with the dog, and uh we'll go around and we will uh I yep, we'll be good. We'll be over there and we'll do things, all right?

Wylie

Okay. Uh Pyra does not like this plan because she is ready to blow things up. And so she said she says,

Pyra

We had a plan. I've made this whole bomb, a very, very big one, used almost all of my explosives.

Jared

100%. That's great. But the storm is going on. We can't go out during the storm, Pyra.

Pyra

Right, but when storm goes away, we'll talk about it. Yeah, we'll talk about it.

Jared

No, we'll put it on the whiteboard. It's on the whiteboard. Big boom.

Pyra

Priority number one.

Jared

Priority number one.

Pyra

All right, so when we the storm is gone and we go to the other base and we blow it up, right? What um what are we going to do?

Jared

That's about it. I think I think we're we blow it up. I think that's the thing.

Pyra

Does everybody get to go to see the explosion?

Gordon

We can't fit everybody.

Wylie

We don't have enough dogs for everybody, Pyra. Hmm. She's like, maybe I'll work on this.

Jared

If it's a bigger explosion, you probably could see it from here.

Pyra

True, true, true. Okay.

Jared

All right. So let's all uh get in our own areas uh and we'll come around and uh make sure that everybody's okay, okay?

Gordon

Oh come on, guy. Someone please stop that.

Wylie

The smell is so bad you think you see Nar's body twitch. Oh no.

Brad

Oh no.

Jared

It's like Nar.

Wylie

Nar's Arnar.

Jared

Uh cool. Um, so I'll be like, all right. Um uh let me look at the map here real quick.

Alan

Oh Alan drops his bowl. Oh, and and it just falls to the ground.

Jared

You're right there. Doctor? Dr. Alan? Uh uh Yeah, I'm fine.

Alan

I think I'm fine.

Jared

Okay. All right. Sweet.

Java Script

Um Java says, um, oh, guys, I I have an idea though. Um it seems that it's better if things get cold. And I know it's stormy outside, but it might be a good idea to open up the windows and uh in some of the cold air. That might also help us and help clear out some of this arcadium sickness.

Jared

Yeah. Um Bo Jangles and I work on that uh specifically. Um I will need um that vase just in case if anything happens. Um as we're coming around, uh anything happens. I I wink at him. Anything happens, all right?

Java Script

Oh, okay. You want me to come with you?

Jared

No, I'll just take the vase.

Java Script

But I'm really gonna operating the vase.

Jared

I understand that. Um for emergency situations, we'll need the vase.

Java Script

Okay, but are you sure you know how to operate the vase? I used it earlier. But I had it set to acid already. What if it gets set to uh Baba Ganoush?

Brad

Kavas.

Gordon

Baba Ganoosh. It is Kavas. Okay, listen, I'm I'm just gonna go ahead and open up the window. Whoever, please, whoever can someone stop farting. I I would appreciate it very much. So uh Gordon goes and opens like a window or or the yeah, or the door right there.

Wylie

Okay. Um when you open the window, you realize this storm isn't as bad as you guys thought it was gonna be. It's like it's windy, but it's not that bad.

Jared

Gordon, I I don't think that's a good idea. I went real Obama there. That was true. Dude, I don't think that's a good idea. Um that's a good idea, sir. Um uh and I'll I'll climb up and I'll I'll close the window. I'll be like, you need to calm down, all right? We just gotta chill out here. Um and do I have the vase yet or did I not grab it yet?

Wylie

Um he was still holding it because he really wants to be a part of this. So he's he's still holding it currently.

Jared

Remember, you're a hero, and I'll I'll grab the vase from him.

Wylie

He like lets you have it, but his face looks like so disappointed and confused. L

Java Script

Like, but how could it be the hero without my discovery?

Jared

Cool. Uh so I close the window, I take the vase, um, and I'm gonna be like, all right, everybody go to your designated areas, and we will be there in a minute, okay? Alright, thank you guys so much. Meeting adjourned.

Pyra

Um and Pyra says, where am I supposed to go? Um The fuel shed is out in the storm.

Jared

Uh you can hang out in the dog Kennels

Pyra

Alright, I'll go there.

Jared

Great. Uh and you guys also need to separate uh Alan and uh Oh, Java? Yeah, Java. Just so we have a clear uh scan of everything. All right. So you can you can wait in the bedroom, I think. Oh the Sleeping Quarters

Alan

We're gonna go and lay down.

Wylie

Let's take some nap.

Alan

Uh cool. Alan practically runs, but he's not running. Uh huh. Yeah.

Jared

Uh cool. Uh I will head uh and we'll go to uh Alan's first, me and Bo Jangles.

Wylie

Okay. Um so Pyra on her way out he opens windows because we talked about opening windows. So she's opening some windows on her way to the dog kennel. So she goes to the dog kennel. Um, Alan, you're gonna go to the sleeping quarters. Gordon, you're gonna stay in the kitchen. Um Java's gonna go to the research lab. Gnar is still on the floor. So I guess I guess we should probably deal with this before you guys leave. The body is warming up and starting to twitch. His unconscious body, he's not dead.

Mimir

I totally forgot about it.

Wylie

Yeah, so gnar starts twitching a little bit.

Mimir

Um yeah, I left. So I I think I just left Nar with him because I totally forgot about Nar.

Gordon

Gordon would probably go grab the body and just throw him right outside the door. Right.

Wylie

In the snow.

Gordon

In the snow.

Wylie

In the snow. Okay. So we're gonna bring up the sleeping quarters.

Jared

The sleeping quarters?

Wylie

We haven't even visited the sleeping quarters yet in this campaign. Alright, these are the sleeping quarters. Gonna put Alan in here. And you can move Alan around.

Alan

Yep.

Wylie

And then we'll see. Okay. And then this is the door up here.

Jared

Cool.

Mimir

And are you asleep already?

Alan

Five minutes.

Jared

Cool. Sweet.

Wylie

Okay, um, so what's Gordon doing at this time?

Gordon

Um, Gordon uh is probably just keeping an eye on Gnar with the door open.

unknown

Yeah.

Gordon

Okay.

Wylie

What was the snow? Outside. Okay.

Gordon

I'm probably watching the storm a little bit too.

Wylie

Mm-hmm. Okay.

Gordon

Getting some fresh air.

Wylie

And Alan's dead asleep.

Alan

Um within five minutes of getting it. What's up, men?

Jared

How are you looking at me like that?

Mimir

I'm just watching. You're just rolling dice up there. Uh okay. Do it. Should I just say it out loud or um yeah. Cool. Um, so I walk into the room. Um, you're sleeping. Okay. Um, what's your AC?

Alan

13.

Mimir

Okay. I beat that. Um, and since you're asleep, it's an auto crit. Um I do 41 points of damage to you as I walk in and I attack you while you're sleeping.

Wylie

Okay, so to clarify, yes, you don't do damage to him.

Mimir

Yes, yes.

Wylie

Um, but you would grapple him.

Mimir

Okay, yes, I grapple him then.

Wylie

Okay. So I'm gonna say that you can successfully grapple him because he's unconscious. Okay, yeah. So you wake up with Jared's arms around you.

Mimir

Come here, buddy. Yeah, come here, come be my friend.

Jared

I thought I got to do a whole buttload of sneak attack, but okay. So I have Yeah, I haven't grappled.

Wylie

Okay.

Alan

So Bo Jangles is not in the room?

Wylie

Bo Jangles, he went out to close windows. So Bo Jengles is not there right now.

Alan

Okay. Alright. Um sorry.

Mimir

I rolled a natural one. I'm sorry. So the grappled? Oh, on the concept. I'm so sorry. That's okay. I'm so sorry.

Alan

Um I'm grappled. I'm grappled.

Wylie

Which means you can cast spells.

Alan

I know, yeah. I gotta figure out what I can do here.

Jared

That's why I closed the window. Oh, no, you're gonna go.

Gordon

That's why that's why I was like, okay, something's off.

Mimir

And that's why I grabbed the vase. I was like, this is the only weapon against us right now. Oh no.

Gordon

Can I be working on something?

Wylie

In the kitchen?

Gordon

Yes.

Wylie

Yeah.

Jared

What are you working on with that? No, yeah. You don't know, you know? You don't know.

Mimir

I'm excited. Having the first person to be possessed is a rogue, is a very bad thing.

Wylie

I really didn't want to let it happen. But you were alone and you rolled a nat one.

Jared

Yeah. No, it makes sense. Yeah. And the percentile die was like 88, I think, is what I rolled. It was bad.

Wylie

If you rolled a Nat1, it didn't matter.

Jared

Yeah. Yeah.

Gordon

Okay. I think I know the answer, but I'm gonna I need the DM to confirm it. So one second.

Jared

There's a bunch of typing messages going on.

Mimir

Everybody's typing something.

Jared

I'm not. I already did my typing. I'm using my computer too, so I it doesn't make any bings.

Mimir

Kipo's out here trying to survive. Um, I will send you over here. Join us, Kipo.

Wylie

Mm-hmm. Okay. Absolutely.

Kipo

That's what I do then. Mm-hmm.

Wylie

Okay, so describe what you do.

Kipo

Um, so Alan's getting where are you how are you grappling me?

Mimir

Uh I have tentacles coming out of me, right?

Wylie

Um I'd say at this point you're you're pretty much revealing yourself. You weren't really trying to be that sneaky. You assume to have a lot of people. Yeah. So the tentacles have burst out of Jared as he's grappling on to uh the laying down form of Dr. Alan Fizzard as this creature is hoping to take possession of Alan as well. So, and some tentacles are uh Alan wakes up wrapped in tentacles with Jared's face staring down at him, and he feels tentacles touching his face .

Kipo

Alan wakes up and he looks and observes what's happening. He's older, he's seeing a lot of stuff. Right now, the first thought that goes through his head is like, why did I unretire? Why am I here right now?

Alan

So he sighs, and then before your eyes, I don't know if you're conscious enough to know what's happening, but um, all that happens is I uh turn into gas. My entire body turns into gas.

Wylie

What color is this gas?

Alan

Um his that's what the parts was earlier. That's what it was. It was Alan all along.

Wylie

It was Alan.

Alan

It wasn't Alan's. It was not Alan. Um what color is Alan's gas? Okay, it's um question every day. I'd like to say like a blue, like a nice dark uh indigo. Oh man.

Brad

Cool.

Alan

So puffs into this nice blue. I mean, that's what I need to pull up his um picture again. Yeah, like just like his robe that he's wearing, that you can see if you're on the Patreon. Uh you can see his nice blue robe. That's exactly what he turns into. Um so he had just cast gaseous form.

Wylie

And how long does that last for?

Alan

So that is going to be an hour, right? One hour up to an hour with concentration. Yeah. And so um spell ends if the creature, me, uh, drops to zero hit points. Um you can't take any damage right now. But I can't really, yeah. While in form, target's only method of movement is flying at the speed of ten feet. Uh target can enter and occupy the space of another creature. The target has resistance to non-magical damage and has advantage on strength, dexterity, and constitution saving throws. Target can pass through small holes, narrow openings, and even mere cracks, though it treats liquids as though they're solid surfaces. Target can can't fall and remains hovering in the air even when stunned or otherwise incapacitated. Okay. So you take half to. So there you go.

Wylie

So you turn into gas in his arms, and what do you do? You can go under door frames. Right.

Alan

I guess he's gonna sleep just like go off the side of the bed underneath that curtain there. I know you're gonna get an attack on it. Take an attack. Um won't be as it will not be 40 damage because I it won't even be sneaked to if you're No, yeah, you don't have you don't have the same damage as a thing. Uh so uh 21 to hit, but it's not gonna do. I have resistance. What does that mean? So you take half damage. Oh, I take half damage. So you only take two damage. I I already have damage for you. Two damage. But I still go.

Wylie

You slip away under the curtain. And you can just tell me what direction you're heading into. You will head there slowly, but you can kind of determine.

Mimir

Question DM, how smart is this alien? Um so Does it have my intelligence?

Wylie

Um I would say it does not have your intelligence right now because um it just took you over. It's just kind of puppeting this body.

Mimir

Yeah.

Wylie

Um, and it takes time for it to acclimate to all of your thoughts and decisions. So it was kind of going along autopilot for a little bit. Um, but you're not gonna be able to do everything that you can normally do.

Mimir

Cool, cool, cool.

Jared

Um well, I was gonna do something with the radio, but since I'm not super intelligent, um, like I am uh as my character sheet says, um, I will um just run after the smoke. Okay. Um and I can't bonus action dash or anything like that because he's not used to my body. So I will just run. Yeah.

Wylie

Okay. So you can probably keep up with the smoke because it can only go 10 feet per round, right?

Mimir

Um yeah, and I I mean I'll take attacks on it when I can, uh basically. Until you can't reach me. Yeah, until I can't reach you.

Wylie

Yeah, if he goes up to the ceiling, yeah. If he goes up to the ceiling, and you you you I mean it depends on how much you're gonna reveal yourself now. Because once you're out in the hallway, yeah. Are you gonna you could spider climb on the walls, but that would really reveal yourself. So you can chase the gas or

Mimir

I'm pretty worried about this, but um let's see if I can oh, there's other people alone.

Wylie

The alien also wouldn't necessarily he he might just think that Alan disappeared. So you could probably you can roll to see if the alien thinks that he disappeared, the creature.

Mimir

Oh yeah, he rolled natural five.

Wylie

Yeah, so he he doesn't really know. He just thinks that Alan turned into gas and then he's gone. He doesn't really realize the gas is Alan currently.

Mimir

He was the guy that's fighting. So uh I will go to the dog kennel and try the same maneuver on Pyra, but I will try to knock her out. Okay when when I get there.

Wylie

Okay, so you're gonna head to the dog kennel. Um is does Alan want to tell me privately where Alan's going? Is that what you want to do? Yeah. Okay.

Mimir

I won't matter game if you totally fine. Because I'm just gonna start going from place to place to place.

Wylie

That would be more uh in line with the strategy. So we do need to take a break here.

Gordon

No words.

Wylie

Um so we'll take a break and maybe you guys can help me figure out this mess I got us into.

Jared

You gave me the power of demons.

Wylie

You were the worst one and to get changed. And we'll figure it out.

Jared

Oh man. And we're back.

Wylie

Starting now. Alan is gas.

Alan

Alan is gas.

Wylie

He is in the hallway. Uh Jared, in quotes, is taking off for the dog kennels. Uh-huh. He's going to try to get Pyra. You told Bo to go close the windows. Yep. So Bo is has gone off and you don't know exactly where he is, but he's gone off to close windows and um maybe do who else knows what. Alan, so you are headed a direction.

Alan

Yep. And um because I can see him, so I'll go the opposite direction. Okay.

Wylie

So let me look up.

Alan

As long as he's not chasing me, yeah.

Wylie

Yeah, he we we had him roll and he failed to determine that you were anything other than just a poof of smoke now.

Alan

Oh, nice, that's right. Okay.

Wylie

So he does not know.

Alan

Wonderful.

Wylie

So I'm gonna bring up the map of our entire base so we can kind of see who's going where.

Mimir

Just for the uh people at home, I was sent the stats and the stat block for who I am now. And let me tell you, it's bad news for these two gym. Okay.

Alan

All right.

Wylie

So the sleeping quarters are very close to the dog kennels. So Jared exits to the mud room and is crossing to the dog kennels. Um so Alan, you would be heading back the hall through the hallway into the biosphere, and you can go from the biosphere to any other location. Gordon is in the kitchen. Um, Java is in the research lab. Jared has the arcane um jug on him that can produce acid. So you know that he has that resource, and we know that the acid damages this creature. It seems to be the main thing that will like pretty much one hit destroy this creature. Pyra is in the dog kennels, because that's where she was told to wait. And so that's the direction she's gone. And we don't know where Bo is right now. And Nar is sleeping in unconscious in the snow outside the kitchen. So these are the locations of all of the players, Kurt and PCs. All separated? Oh no. Everyone is separated. Um so where should we go first? Kitchen or dog kennels?

Mimir

Bring me to the dog kennels and see how that goes.

Wylie

Uh if you're going to the kitchen. If you want to go to kitchen?

Alan

Because it logically looks very close. Okay. So I'm out. Yeah.

Wylie

Do you and um Gordon perhaps want to chit-chat while it's scene unrolled. Am I there? Yeah, you we can say that you made it there. Oh, awesome. And um if you guys want to do kind of a behind-the-scenes coordination. Okay. So we're gonna go to the dog kennels and see what happens there.

Mimir

assuming, the dogs freak out when I walked in.

Wylie

Yes. So Pyra is standing over here, and you enter in the door down here at the bottom of the map. And um Finn was laying down in his kennel, and as soon as you enter, Finn sits up, ears perk up, and he kind of growls at you a little bit.

Pyra

And Pyra is standing over here working on something. So she hears him growl, turns around, sees you come in, and she goes, Ah, great. Look at what I'm working on. I've made a rocket propelled sled. Whoa. Look, see, I put some explosives here. This will get this through the other base much quicker, and we can blow it up very fast.

Jared

Yeah, sure. Wait, show me how it show me how it works here. Um and I will like go up behind her.

Wylie

Okay, so you're coming up. Yeah as you get closer, Finn gets up, growls more, and barks at you. And she does not fail to notice this. She sees that Finn doesn't like you right now. And so she she looks at you and she says, What's going on?

Jared

We had an incident with Alan. He's he's gone mad.

Pyra

Dr. Fizzard. Yeah. That's wrong.

Jared

I don't know. He's been acting really strange. And so, um, yeah, you wanna you wanna show me more about this rocket sled?

Pyra

Should we go check on him?

Jared

Um, I don't think so. I think we should be uh we we want to check in here and um um and be good here.

Pyra

She pulls out her walkie-talkie and she says, Dr. Fizzard? Dr. Fizzard, are you there?

Kipo

Um everything on my person turns is a good thing.

Wylie

Yeah, you if you're still gas, you'd still be gas. And you might still be gas.

Alan

Oh, you know what? I'm not. Because if I was making myself known to him, then I would have ended that spell. So Okay.

Wylie

Um you can you can answer or you can not answer, it's up to you. Because Dr. Fizzard might not answer.

Mimir

Doesn't even know. Is there a radio on? You should roll something.

Wylie

Well, Ramshield has a radio too. It's in the kitchen now.

Gordon

And I would probably look at him and at least if if

Alan

I can get to the radio. Um be like, Yes.

Pyra

Dr. Fizzit, are you okay?

Alan

No. Jared has gone mad and he attacked me. I will please be Okay, you're gonna Please be careful if you see him.

Wylie

Okay, roll for initiative.

Jared

Cool.

Wylie

She's not surprised because she was feeling sus.

Jared

Yeah, no, I figured as much. I'm not super smart in this form, so uh nine.

Wylie

She gets a 19.

Jared

Yeah. She only does fire damage, though. I'm I should be good.

Wylie

Okay. Um, so she's been around for the conversations. She was around for the conversation about what's going on. So she charges towards you. She grabs you. So make a strength check to see if you can resist being picked up.

Mimir

Oh my gosh, you're so lucky.

Jared

I would keep unrolling so bad. Mamir's curse is real. Uh si uh six total. I have two guys communicating through uh electronics in front of me, and they keep making faces.

Wylie

Okay, she didn't roll out well, but she rolled to 10. So she s grabs you, picks you up, the door to the outside is right there. So she opens the door, shoves you out in the snow, and slams the door shut.

Mimir

Okay.

Wylie

You are not out in the cold.

Gordon

Cool.

Wylie

Okay.

Gordon

And so He just starts doing this. Flailing all around.

Mimir

Can I can I do something?

Jared

I have the keys, both sets of keys on me. Um now I don't know if the alien would be smart enough to not go back in there, but actually go to the area where we can do intelligence check.

Wylie

Okay, cool. With his stats, with the alien stats.

Jared

Gosh. What he get. Oh, it's so bad all the time. Uh, it's pretty smart though. Uh 12.

Wylie

Okay, 12. I'm gonna say immediately at this moment.

Jared

I want to get back inside.

Wylie

You want to get back inside. You go you were shocked, kind of. You didn't expect her to know that much about what was going on.

Mimir

Yeah.

Wylie

Um, because the alien wasn't necessarily present. Like he has kind of your memories, but as you remember, it's kind of hard for them to access everything as quickly as as you guys would. So you can try to get back into this door

Jared

Okay.

Wylie

Should we check back in in the kitchen or should we just keep going?

Jared

They're going, they're texting back and forth.

Wylie

Okay. So you guys do hear on the radio. Oh, wait, I'm gonna take up this. I was looking at the chat.

Alan

Your radio is going. The chat's not working for some reason.

Wylie

So you guys let me know if I'm not paying attention to something I should pay attention to.

unknown

All right.

Wylie

You've been shoved out into the snow.

Mimir

Yeah.

Wylie

And you hear um, you hear

Pyra

Pyra on the walkie-talkie say, I've just pushed him outside the door. He was he attacked me in the kennels. He's outside in the snow. We should make sure all the doors are locked.

Mimir

Yeah, good luck with that. No one listened to me when I try to lock the door. She carries a little more weight. Okay.

Wylie

And then she follows up,

Pyra

and if you don't do this, I will blow up your bed.

Jared

That makes sense. No, that makes sense.

Java Script

And then you hear Java say, um, I bought right on it.

Jared

Uh I want to unlock the door in front of me.

Wylie

Okay. The alien does not actually know which key. Yes. There's a lot of keys.

Jared

Neither did that errand. Neither did Jared. So even if it had full access in 24 Four hours with my body.

Wylie

This is gonna be a disadvantaged check.

Jared

And I'm probably gonna say like sleight of hand.

Wylie

Intelligence.

Jared

Okay.

Wylie

Yeah.

Mimir

Cool.

Wylie

And so make sure you're using its stats.

Mimir

The first roll was a natural 20, but it's with disadvantage. Okay.

Jared

Fifte.

Wylie

A 15. I'm gonna say you've you have 20 keys.

Jared

Okay.

Wylie

And so I'm gonna say that you've you're you've narrowed it down to five. To the last five. Okay.

Jared

Cool. Um cool. I will uh continue trying keys. Can I make another intelligence check?

Wylie

Yeah, hang on a second. Yeah, you can go ahead and roll it. Roll natural 20. You build a natural 20 intelligence check. Okay. Um as you fiddle with the lock, you realize that it's not just locked, it's blocked from the inside now.

Mimir

That's what I was expecting.

Wylie

So that's what she was working on.

Jared

Yeah. Um so um I am gonna go because I know I have about two hours ish in in the cold that like like I'll be like stunned if I but it is a storm.

Wylie

Yeah, it's so it's cold, it's colder than it was before.

Mimir

Yeah. So there's a couple things I want to do. Um I think what I want to do is go around to the uh kitchen and untie my ally.

Wylie

Okay. Nar who's outside in the snow. Okay. Um, so that's gonna take you a little bit because it is now nighttime.

Mimir

Yeah.

Wylie

So it's night, it's dark, it's windy, and it's snowy. Um and the storm isn't as bad as you guys thought, but you can't see, so it's not complete whiteout.

Mimir

Okay.

Wylie

If it was total whiteout, you wouldn't be able to see anything. You're probably going to have to put your hand against the wall and follow it around. And um you're gonna see the map again, the big map. So the alien wouldn't know. Oh the layout as well. So um we're gonna let Jared sort through that. Um, and I'm gonna check back in with our kitchen crew.

Jared

Because I would just go to the nearest door then. Because it if it's too cold, I think I would go to the start feeling your way around the building.

Wylie

Start. Okay. Yeah, so I'll I'll consult the map and um let you know about that in a second. Should we visit? He still has the pot? He has the pot currently.

Jared

I have the pot and I have the keys, both sets of keys. And then I don't I don't think I have it.

Alan

And then Bo is running around.

Jared

And Bo's perfectly fine. Everybody loves Bo Jam.

Mimir

Isn't it time for like sickness to come in or something like that?

Wylie

So they've been opening windows. So the arcanium sickness um, because he fixed the heater, but there was still some of the arcanium in there, but it does seem to be dissipating. Okay, can you give me investigation? Can you just roll a raw D20?

Jared

Yep.

Wylie

This is to see if Pyra beats you to the next door. And she gets advantage because she's inside and you are outside. Her highest roll is a 13.

Mimir

I rolled another natural 20. Mine old. Yeah, no joke. Okay. And no joke. That's really rare for me. I'm the worst roller. It's gonna come back to bite me when I go into combat, trust me.

Wylie

Okay, so you open the door and run into the mud room. She was entering the mud room from the dog kennels. She sees that you're in there, so she runs back into the dog kennels and she's barricading the dog kennel door that she came through. So you can't get to her right now. Um unless you want to. You can try to get that door. So your option is to go into the sleeping quarters, and then you'll have to go up into the biosphere. Cool. Then those are the only directions you can go if you stay inside. I do some.

Jared

Okay. Uh I've uh try to find bone jingles, I think, is what my next mission is.

Wylie

Okay. So you're gonna head through the sleeping quarters, you're gonna go up in the biosphere, and from the biosphere, you can kind of decide to go any direction. Cool. So we'll revisit that in a second.

Jared

Cool.

Wylie

Okay, kitchen crew.

unknown

Great.

Mimir

Another idea. Okay. Um you you do you do you all message you. You do these guys.

Wylie

You do hear the radio say he's back inside the building.

Gordon

He's bad.

Jared

I'm coming to get you.

Alan

I don't think um Java is turned. I think he's fine.

Gordon

Yeah, let's say he locked himself in originally. I guess can we call on the radio for Java?

Wylie

But you d so at this point, uh, do you call on him be like while the kennel stuff is happening, or do you call on him after he's gotten back into the building?

Alan

Yeah, I guess we have some leniency there, because we would have been chatting for a while while all that's going on, him trying to break back in. Um before. Well, I'd say before. So I say I get back, uh, I make myself not mist. And uh that's right, we do the whole walkie-talkie thing. Pyro knows. So now you know, Pyro knows, and I hope you believe me, because at this point, well, you said all of you said all of that on the on the radio. I said, Hey, Java say what have heard too. Yeah, Java would have heard it. Yeah.

Wylie

So did did Java ever say anything to um so when she had said to lock everything, she respond he responded, because she's like, I'm gonna blow up your stuff if you don't. Oh yeah.

Jared

Okay. Cool. Yeah, he's safe. Don't you worry.

Gordon

Now I'm worried. Okay.

Jared

This is so fun, guys.

Gordon

So weird. Now I'm like, what do I do?

Wylie

Okay, so you you came out to the chick to the kitchen, and so you came out of your gaseous form. And so what happens when Alan enters the kitchen and comes out of his gaseous form?

Alan

Well, that's what happened was I was called on the radio because my radio was then solid, and so we had that whole conversation. So after that happened, where Pyra said or did did the action because I said uh careful Jared attacked me. Um That's where we're picking it.

Wylie

The walkie-talkies, yeah, would have gone quiet. So Gordon is in the kitchen and you see this cool royal blue like smoke come in. And so that comes into the kitchen. Yeah. And then Alan Fizzard materializes in front of you.

Gordon

He probably would have had a moment where he was just like, Wow, it looks like spice is coming in the world.

Alan

Oh my spice! Oh, Alan.

Gordon

He's the spicy, he's the spice.

Wylie

Um Alan would would tell you he just said like Jared's bad news at this time.

Alan

Jared's infected, I saw the tentacles, then he doesn't really know what to do. I mean, really. Jared was the one with the plan. Because we don't know who else is infected at this point. Um, but at least I have acid of my own. So I know that does damage and hurts at least the um the squids. Um and with all of this going on, should I reveal? Should I hold on to what I've been working on?

Wylie

Um you can save that if you want.

Gordon

I'll save it. All right, save it.

Wylie

Unless I mean, unless you feel like you want it, if you feel like you would share that with Alan, or it's up to you.

Gordon

I mean, I probably would share it if I'm like, okay.

Wylie

I think that'll be fine.

Gordon

Yeah. All right. So Gordon has been working on uh making something because he realized that acid is what kills them. Yeah. Right. Of course, he's eaten the jelly and the idea of what Java said of the acid being in your stomach, right? So uh he has come up with this whole pot made of very acidic foods. So it's got vinegar, it's got pickle juice, it's got uh orange and citrusy fruit, it's got coffee, it's got uh tomatoes, it's got everything that can be acidic that's just been stewing into this. Very nice. How do we get them to eat it? I mean we just throw it on them. Oh, just throw it at them, yeah. Oh, I like that. And also uh for Gordon's sake, he'll probably put it on his axe. So when he cuts. Oh that's so good.

Wylie

Oh, the axe with acid. Great. So um, can you describe it in Gordon's voice, kind of what you've been doing?

Gordon

Okay, Doctor. So uh Dr. Vizard. Dr. Vizard. Uh so uh so what I have made here, I've made this wonderful concoction. Uh it it is not great for taste, but uh I have thought of all of the acidic foods and things that we have here, and so I have made this very, very acidic uh soup, if you will, uh which you can put on to for me I I will put onto my weapons. Um so whenever I cut them, it's almost like a very acidic thing.

Alan

Does it still taste good?

Gordon

I mean you can try yet. Actually, Gordon at that moment would be like, all right,

Alan

egg covered bread.

Brad

He would probably actually feed you some just to make sure you're not infected. Yeah, perfect. That's fine, it's fine. Okay, just to see although you're gonna be suspicious. Everybody's suspicious now. Oh no, now I'm afraid

Alan

he likes it. He likes it.

Mimir

It's good.

Gordon

That's hilarious. He loves the acidic things, and macrons are not acidic. Wow, learning something new about it. Yeah, yeah. Okay, okay.

Wylie

So Alan Fizzard really likes sour patch kids. It's his favorite dessert.

Gordon

Okay, now I know what to make in the future.

Wylie

Always keeping track of what everybody likes to eat.

Gordon

Yeah.

Wylie

Okay.

Gordon

Um, and so yeah, I just shares that.

Alan

Okay, well, what do what do you think we should do?

Gordon

I don't know. Uh, we should leave Narr outside and shut the door, like Pyra said. Um I thought of smashing open the windows to make it cold, but I also don't want them to be able to get inside through a smash window, too. So I am not sure.

Alan

I think we should meet up with Pyra.

Gordon

I think that is a good idea. So we should probably well, we probably can't radio, because if we do, I would assume that the alien Jared can hear what what we are saying. Also, there is something about this uh gelatinous cube that that might be the way to save our friends and get rid of the aliens. But I don't know how to go about it.

Alan

I don't know where where you can find a gelatinous cube in our base. I mean, do we have your lab?

Wylie

You guys don't have a gelatinous uh gelatinous cubes are not common. Right.

Gordon

So the only gelatinous cube I know of is at the other base.

Wylie

Um and you hear Pyra say on the radio, um

Pyra

guys, I've made a rocket propelled sled so we can get to other base much more quickly now. I have hidden it. I have hidden it because this Jared guy is bad news now, but he knows I made it, but he doesn't know where I put it, so it's hidden.

Alan

I don't want to leave Java.

Gordon

Right.

unknown

He's dead.

Alan

But how I mean, how locked up is the the lab?

Wylie

Like Um, the lab has, you know, Java locked it previously, and he's probably secured himself in it now. So he's probably pretty well locked in because when Pyra said, hey, make sure like he definitely locked it when you guys left. Yeah and then he locked it down when Pyra activated him just now. So um he's probably good.

Gordon

I think we would need to find Pyra first. Yeah. Because if we did want to get Java, we would then need to go probably with Pyra so he knows that we're not all infected. Right. How? I mean

Alan

I can get to Can you still go into your uh It it's a little iffy because I'm not we're not in battle, but I still use spell slots and then would need a rest to get them back.

Mimir

Concentration for an hour. So it's up to the DM if that is like if you're technically still concentrating, and you can go back and forth between it. Because that spell is always like you know, it's always been like pretty things.

Wylie

So you're saying if you could go back into Gaseous form?

Alan

Yeah, just to like get to Java. But I'm thinking if I have anything else that I can do as well.

Mimir

Should we go over what I'm doing? Um just because I I I don't think they'll bet a game.

Wylie

No, it's okay.

Alan

Okay, go I mean we're gonna have to leave the kitchen. Yeah. So why don't you and I leave the kitchen? Okay. Together. Together. And we go around and just search around for Pyra.

Gordon

Uh-huh. So where was the last place that we knew she was? Dog kennels. Alright, then I say we have for the kennels. Just head that way. We would just have for the dog kennels. Okay.

Wylie

You gotta go to through the biosphere to get there. Yeah. Which is probably so you guys had to and the chickens.

Alan

Don't forget about the chickens.

Gordon

Well, yeah, it depends on is it all the chickens or was it just Hank? Just Hank. Yeah. It's probably all the chickens.

Wylie

Um, so are you guys being sneaky or not when we get to the channel?

Alan

Probably be, I mean, as sneaky as he could be.

Gordon

Probably not much. Okay.

Wylie

Well just give me both of you roll stealth checks, and we'll just see how how loud you are headed to the biosphere. Meanwhile, I'm gonna load the biosphere.

Alan

Oh, I rolled a natural one. And you rolled a natural twenty.

unknown

What is that sounds like

Wylie

Alan sits on his special chair and starts rolling?

Mimir

I love the idea of like down the hall, and you're like, and then you just pick him up and carry him.

Wylie

Okay, I'm gonna say that um That's tough.

Gordon

That is tough.

Wylie

Okay.

Jared

They could re-roll, maybe.

Gordon

Because that's that's we just swap the eye kit than that one.

Wylie

That's so crazy. Okay. So you guys are going to be entering the biosphere. In the center of the biosphere is Jared.

unknown

Cool.

Wylie

So Alan, you see Alan comes in and you see him very quickly. Um, because you enter and he's right there in the middle.

Mimir

Sure.

Wylie

Um, you only see Alan enter. Cool. You have no idea where Gordon is.

Jared

I'm here. Um I'm like grabbing the chickens, and I'm like,

Wylie

so there are currently three chickens sitting very well behaved near Jared. Um, and then the rest of the chickens are freaking out and are going all different directions.

Jared

The second he enters and I see him, I go, whoosh, I look at him and I make eye contact and I say, Doctor.

Alan

Is there any initiative rolled yet?

Wylie

Um, yeah, let's roll for initiative.

Alan

Oh, oh, would you I was gonna cast something.

Wylie

Okay, if if you would cast something right when you spot him, yeah, then that's fine. Because you yeah, you saw him and he hasn't seen everybody, anyone else yet. So great.

Alan

Invisibility on myself.

Wylie

Oh, nice. Okay. Thank you. So Alan is invisible. So I'm gonna take you off the map.

Jared

And will you honestly, if I don't see him anymore, I'm just assuming that he went into the thing and I'm gonna continue with the chickens. Okay. Because I'm not super smart, right?

Wylie

Okay, yeah. You're you're not you you're not with your normal Jared mindset. You have different priorities now. So now both Alan and Gordon are hidden within the biosphere. Okay.

Jared

Don't we want more chicken friends?

Gordon

Um, I think we would probably just be or do we still need to roll initiative?

Wylie

Um, I think because you guys are invisible, no. You you can just kind of let me know if you want to just say that you do something because he doesn't see you. With that not 20, you are hidden.

Alan

Two versus one right now, kind of, with the chickens. It might be arming them with cattles.

Wylie

Each of the chickens has a tiny gatling gun.

Gordon

Yeah, they all have guns. But remember, what's uh what are we trying to accomplish? Right. So I although yes, like

Mimir

I do have keys on my belt, two sets of keys. And you have the vase. And I have the I forgot about that. That is a good point.

Wylie

If you're able to restrain him, you could probably get the vase back.

Gordon

Alright. If I s so what do you think if uh if I snuck up on him and Oh you can? I mean, you're in stealth right now. Yeah.

Alan

But I wouldn't touch him. Because he's got tentacles and stuff.

Gordon

Okay, could I sneak up and then steal the vase?

Wylie

You have to do a slight of hand check, but you could do that.

Jared

I don't know what my slight of hand is. How's your uh is that decks? Um should I roll to see if I put down the base? Because I am herding chickens right now.

Wylie

True. Yeah, you could roll to see if you think that it wouldn't be as big a pro.

Alan

How big is this Pitcher?

Jared

I'm gonna say you just want high, because I'm cheering for you guys.

Wylie

Like big? And small. It's about this tall that I'd say wider. I'd say the size of a big gulp.

Jared

Well, I still have it in my hand.

Wylie

Okay. So he he's got he's holding it by the big handle. And at last known, it was still activated for acid. So

Alan

tip it.

Gordon

My sleight of hand is only a plus two, so I have really good sleight of hand.

Wylie

Oh man. And Alan is invisible. And you're invisible.

Gordon

And you are invisible.

Alan

So I think I think I'll try to do that.

Wylie

Okay. Alan's gonna sneak up and try to snatch the the infinite gulp.

Alan

Yes.

Jared

Come on. Come here, Mr. Chicken. Ooh. My friend, my army rises.

Mimir

You get advantage, though, because you're invisible, right? And so I rolled a natural one.

Wylie

But you have advantage because you're invisible.

Alan

Sick. That is a 23. Should I roll?

Wylie

Um, to see if you notice him?

Mimir

Uh just to see if I'm holding on to it well or anything like that, or does he just take it from the case?

Wylie

Yeah, for the 23, he gets away with it. Um, you could you're gonna notice that it's out of your hand.

Gordon

So, and I think it does turn invisible. Yeah, it turns invisible because it's now his. Yeah.

Wylie

So as far as you know, this thing you were holding just boop gone. Who does it? Because yeah.

Mimir

Is it I just think about your holding when you cast? Uh well, I mean, if you want to get technical with you know me. I'm a technical little guy.

Alan

Um anything the target is wearing or carrying is invisible as long as it's on the target's person. So you does become visible. Yeah.

Jared

So I go, I go, shh, and I'm like. Oh no.

Alan

Maybe we got it back.

Jared

Chicken army find it. Find the doctor. Um, that's my new order is and I'll all over the radio. We need to find the doctor.

Gordon

All right. So do we want to do anything else or you just want to head to now we can head straight to uh pyra in the dog kennels with that? Yeah. Now we've got a weapon for you guys, and yeah. He doesn't have it.

Jared

What? Don't worry about that.

Gordon

Oh my gosh. I mean, we'll see. We'll see. All right. So yeah, let's just uh we'll stealthily head towards Pyra. Yep.

Wylie

Okay. Um so you're heading towards Pyra in the dog kennels. Do you tell anything to Java?

Alan

No, because we don't want anyone to hear anything. And he's locked in. Like he's locked up. That's fine. Unless we were leaving the bait the camp, I don't think we would okay.

Wylie

So you're just meeting up with Pyra at this point. Right. Okay. Okay. So you head towards the dog kennels and they are looking. And let me see how many different exits there are out of this to help determine. So um, Jared, are you looking for them? Like you're trying to figure out.

Mimir

Yeah, I think I'm gonna head to to Java because that's I that's logically what the aliens like. Oh, that's their smartest person that they're gonna go to. So that's where they're gonna make a weapon.

Wylie

You're heading to the research lab. Okay, cool. And they're heading to the dog kennels. Okay, so you guys meet up, you guys do meet up with Pyra. She was coming up the hallway towards the biosphere, but she meets up with you guys. So you can kind of behind the scenes to kind of determine, I guess, what you guys do.

Gordon

Honestly, I would because I would probably have a pot of it. Yeah, and I don't know. Yeah, and I would say, uh, uh Pyra, I needed you to take a bite of this uh just just for our sake, uh just to know if we are still good.

Pyra

Okay, this is emergency.

Gordon

Yes, this is emergency to take a bite of this.

Pyra

This is emergency snack?

Gordon

Yes.

Wylie

Okay. So she takes a bite.

Pyra

And uh she kind of goes, this is not your best.

Gordon

Okay. That that that's

Alan

not hurting her. Right. There's no pain. Okay.

Wylie

She's scrunches up her face, but she's like, you know,

Gordon

she starts wiggling and like convulsing.

Wylie

Yeah, so she seems fine. She doesn't she's not impressed by it, but she seems fine.

Gordon

Which is fine. You don't have to be impressed. Mega be good. But everybody's kind of enjoying this. So now I'm getting afraid. No. No. All right.

Wylie

Okay. Um, so we've got Jared heading to the research lab. And so I assume that you would probably My invisibility's off now. Mm-hmm. Because it only lasts a minute.

Alan

Yeah, it lasts up to an hour, but I don't want to keep using my concentration for it because then I want her to see me in the pot. Okay. So I hand the pot to her. Yeah. You you want it? You want the pot. Hold on. You got two pots. I think you should hold on to the pot. But I already have an acid move. So I'm not sure.

Gordon

Oh, you're true. You're true. Uh like Pokemon. Acid move. Acid move. So I would say uh yes, I'll I'll hold on to the pot. Okay.

Wylie

Okay. Great. All right.

Gordon

Um So then I'll see you. Yeah, I just I fill up the now the the acid, well, although that might eat through the pot. Yeah. Never mind, never mind.

Wylie

Um So I'm gonna say that you arrive outside the research lab. Cool. The research lab door has a very sturdy window that it would be very hard to break through. But it has a window so that people can see inside. So if there's something sensitive going on inside, and so Java's in there, like kind of looking around, and he's looking out the window.

Jared

I make a creepy. And I give him a really like blank stare and I go, Don't you wanna be a hero? Let me in. And I'm gonna start trying the keys one at a time. Slowly but surely, eventually gonna break.

Wylie

So as you're you're he could see you through the window. You're approaching. Please roll a D20 for me.

Jared

Okay. 19. Wow. Crazy rolls. Crazy rolls over here.

Wylie

That's a good roll. Okay, so you approach the door and you start trying the keys.

Jared

Be a hero, Java

Wylie

So I'm gonna say about every six seconds you can try the keys. Every turn. And so, and I'm gonna say that. So, how many keys? 20 keys.

Mimir

Yeah, 20 keys.

Wylie

So I'll have you roll for keys. Um you can roll for your first one right now. Cool. So um just roll a D20.

Jared

Oh man. Oh, I don't know what it looks like. Oh, and roll one nine.

Wylie

Okay, you got a nine. Cool. Um, so you don't you didn't get the key this time.

Gordon

That's right. And it goes down by one every time.

Wylie

Cool. Yeah. Yeah. So I'll I'll be complete you have 20 keys and it gets easier and easier every time that you roll. Um so you've um eliminated a couple. So yes, go ahead. Um, you guys are approaching the lab um with pyra and with the acid.

Gordon

With pyra, though, I would have wanted to ask before we get to the research where the uh oh the sled. The sled is at.

Pyra

It's outside.

Gordon

Where it outside.

Pyra

Near the kennels.

Gordon

Okay. Sounds good.

Alan

How many was on the sled?

Gordon

It's only two people on the sled. No, it was four originally, but she made two per sled.

Wylie

Oh, okay. Yeah, so she didn't she made she's made one rocket sled, but she made it pretty fast. So um she's like, Do you want me to make another one? If you have two sleds, we can make two rocket sleds.

Gordon

So we have one rocket sled.

Wylie

So far.

Gordon

And it only fits two people. Two people.

Pyra

Maybe we could maybe do three.

Gordon

I'll huddle it up. Well, we've got it in size.

Pyra

She's like, maybe I can extend a sled. Because the limit was the strength of the dogs, but this is a rocket.

Gordon

True.

Pyra

Not so much the space. So We could maybe fit three. You're a bit bigger, so maybe extend sled. Maybe you are skis behind.

Gordon

Gordon is just like almost like water skiing, but it's real ski. It's just being pulled, you know, like

Pyra

how how good ski are you?

Gordon

We'll see. I would say Gordon probably grew up. I mean, he grew up in the in the cold area, so. Which yeah, I'm I'm I'm pretty good.

Pyra

My Okay, this worked. You go to skis, me and Mr. Fizzard, we ride them the sled.

unknown

Okay.

Pyra

Maybe Java too. He's small.

Gordon

Alright. Yeah. Sounds good to me.

Pyra

Not Jared.

Alan

Not day. So we are headed to the research lab.

Gordon

That because that's our that's our thought. Yeah. Well because originally w

Alan

We get Java at this point, because everybody else is doing great. Doing great. Yep. Yep. Okay. Okay. Yeah, we had that way.

Jared

Okay. I don't think the chickens are with me. So my army is.

Mimir

My idea's clucking around. My idea if you stayed in the kitchen long enough is just to bring a giant uh armada of chickens to you guys.

Wylie

So the difficulty is they are also somewhat limited. Uh-huh. Like by still chickens. Yeah, they're still chickens. So it's not.

Jared

It's just funny the aliens like, oh, so many living things. Yeah. Yeah. All right.

Wylie

Can you roll another D20 for me while you're talking about natural 20?

Mimir

Here we go. Come on. No way, just natural 20. I'm not joking you. Oh my goodness. That's my third natural 20, and I called it before.

Wylie

That's crazy. Crazy. Can you use different dice, please? I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. No, that's fine. So that was not for keys. That was a roll for wisdom's save because Java's trying to do something. So you did succeed. You've succeeded twice now. Okay. Um so you can roll for keys now. Okay. You can use the different mini. You can use the same dice in the right. I'm just teasing.

Mimir

Uh 11. I'm trying to hit 20 other. I think Kippo would have just flipped the tape. I'm nailed.

Wylie

All right.

Mimir

That's crazy though.

Wylie

Okay, the key DC is down to 17. Cool. Um, and so you guys are approaching the lab. So I'd say that um you guys see him at the door facing the lab, drawing keys.

Gordon

Just key by key.

Wylie

And you guys are in the hallway. So if you want to sneak up, you need to do a stealth roll. And Pyra's with you guys, right?

Gordon

Correct.

Wylie

Okay.

Gordon

Do we want to sneak up? Well, it gives us a little bit of

Alan

how far away are we?

Wylie

Let me look at the map and see what the hallway looks like. It's a pretty short hallway to the research lab. So I'd say 30 feet. Cool. Once you leave the biosphere. And there's um three chickens.

Mimir

They're standing guard. My Chicken army Needs a leader.

Alan

So I see Jared.

Wylie

With his back to you. So roll stealth check to see if he hears you guys approaching.

Gordon

Nat 20.

Wylie

So silent. Gordon can be so quiet when it matters. Oh, nice. You do not hear them approaching.

Mimir

I love it. It doesn't help that I'm a yelling so loud "JAVA"

Alan

We could sneak up and just pour acid on him. We could, yeah. Might kill him though. It's always worth it. But I mean But also neutralize. I guess what I was gonna do was just like cast acid splash anyway, and just kind of like throw him off. But if we have the bucket, like I'd rather just dump a bucket on him. Right. Because I don't know what else to do to restrain. I mean, I have I could do that. Um I'm gonna cast Hold person.

Wylie

Okay. So um Jared, you ha you have to just roll a straight because you don't get any pluses to wisdom.

Mimir

13 

Alan

My DC save is 14

Mimir

Nice. Okay. But he's paralyzed.

Brad

Okay.

Jared

My chickens now activate. \

Gordon

Where are the chickens still on the biosphere?

Wylie

Um the normal chickens are. Um the possessed ones are wandering around in the hallway.

Mimir

Yeah, they're like standing behind me, I'm guessing. Okay.

Alan

So up to a minute.

Gordon

Okay. So uh Gordon would sneak up and probably uh well first he would whisper acid or acid. Um and then would sneak up to the chickens and just start pouring acid on all of them.

Wylie

Okay, okay, because you got that at 20 stealth, I think you're gonna have no problem. Nice, but we know with the composition of the chicken that it completely disintegrates and the um the the infinite gulp cannot pour that, you know, too much flu fluid at one time, but it's uh I think it's enough to cover all three chickens at this point. Yeah, because they're small creatures. So um we have some disintegrated chickens.

Gordon

Perfect.

Wylie

We have a frozen Jared. How long is he paralyzed for?

Alan

Up to one minute.

Wylie

Up to one minute. Okay. Um so what are you guys gonna do in your one minute? Quickly.

Gordon

So from there we just need to Now you need to restrain him. Okay. You need to grapple him or we get Java out and out.

Wylie

Mm-hmm.

Gordon

I think I think we get Java. You get Java? Um Yeah, yeah, that's what we should do. I I think at that point, Java, we would we would probably be like, you know, stop being stealthy. Mm-hmm and then talk to Java.

Wylie

Okay, okay. So we can talk to Java real quick. Yeah. So Java would see you guys.

Gordon

Specifically Pyra, because he had listened to her to lock the door.

Wylie

Mm-hmm. Yep. And so he would see that you guys stopped Jared and you stopped the chicken. So he would trust you guys and he'd be like,

Java Script

um, is it okay if I open the door now?

Gordon

Yes. Hurry. Yes, hurry.

Java Script

Let's get about with the cold immediately.

Gordon

That was a good idea. Yeah.

Wylie

Okay. So um can you you guys want to transport him out into the cold? Yeah. Okay. Um, and do you do anything to restrain him?

Alan

I mean, if we have rope,

Mimir

I would love handcuffs on me.

Brad

Oh, I have to do it.

Mimir

I have literally everything you need. I have keys, I have handcuffs, I have all the weapons. Yeah. Yep, yep.

Alan

I mean, if that's it is hanging there.

Gordon

Would definitely okay, would steal his keys. Both sets. There's two sets of keys. Yes. Both sets of keys and nice. Uh we would uh handcuff it. Put him in handcuffs.

Alan

Yeah, I'd even, if we had I don't know how long that takes. I'm probably getting greedy with it then. So we just handcuff him.

Wylie

Handcuff him, and you got him out in the cold immediately. Stick him out there. Um so if the um I I would say that there's probably like uh so we don't windows on all the doors outside. It's dark out. Um, but maybe if somebody has like a light cantrip or something, um that way you could keep an eye on him.

Mimir

I have a lantern on my belt too. And um I literally have everything for emergency. So that's my job.

Wylie

And so you know Nar was outside for about an hour and he did not transform or grow tentacles or anything like that. Um and so with those observations, um,

Java Script

Java concludes is uh I think that because it's so cold outside, it's not able to grow the tentacles unless it's been like severed or dismembered. So I think it's gonna stay inside his body where the that most warmth is. Yeah, that it won't be able to crawl around.

Gordon

Okay. So do we just want to get out of there now? Leave him and go. That's what I think.

Wylie

Just leave them out in the cold.

Gordon

Leave them in the cold, and then we go to the other base. Now we gotta deal with them, but yeah.

Wylie

Okay, all right.

Gordon

Okay.

Wylie

Um, so Nar is out in the cold.

Gordon

Yeah, I'm waiting for Bojangles to show up because he's just freelance, just closing windows up. It's like Jared, this is a buff window.

Jared

Oh, worry, yeah. Every window. Every window.

Wylie

All right, so you guys, you, um, so Alan, Pyra, yeah, and um Java load up on the sled and take off. And you're behind on skis.

Gordon

Hold on, what did you say? Oh, you're behind on skis. Yes, yes, yes, yes. I'm like, what about uh Gordon?

Wylie

So we're yeah. We're we're jet boating it all the way all the way back.

Mimir

Uh Jangles, my secret character, is hiding in the sleep.

Alan

We still have a whole army of people at this base who were just

Gordon

Yes, but they they were actually very they were just being weird. Yeah, yeah. Very chill. We're just being weird. Which we we know what we need to get. Yeah. Like literally get it and get out and let Pyro gonna get it though. I got I was out of there.

Alan

Let's get there.

Wylie

So you guys would have about an hour. Um it's it's you know, it like we said, it's stormy, but it's not too bad. Um and now and now you guys have you have the jet the you know, and um she was with you going to the base before. So she's able to navigate pretty good. So I'm gonna roll for her to see how well she navigates. Okay, good. She rolled pretty good. Um she got a 16 and then hit a bow.

Mimir

You have a jail in your your you have a screw in your in your sled.

Wylie

Yeah, she got a 16, and I'm gonna add survival to that, which is just a plus three for her, but that's a total of 19. You guys get to the base um real fast. Like 15 minutes, you guys are there.

Alan

Yeah, let's go.

Wylie

So you're at the you are now outside Istid JoKul.

Alan

Here we are again.

Pyra

And she says, Don't worry, I also brought the explosives.

Gordon

I see. Oh, no way. Okay. So we need the gelatinous cube. Fifteen minutes?

Wylie

Mm-hmm. That's how quick you guys got there.

Alan

How long? I mean, a short rest is like an hour, right? 30 minutes or an hour, yeah. And we wait another 15. I want to get some spell slots back. Yeah.

Wylie

I mean, you could say it took a little bit of time. You know, if Alan would have maybe rested while you guys were getting some stuff done, you know.

Mimir

You get that arcane recovery. I'll take that. You get one spell. Do I have it? Uh any wizard has arcane recovery.

Alan

Oh, I have it right here. Spell slots plus three, short rest. Yeah. Okay, well, there you go. Perfect. Cool. Okay. Um up to th third level. Oh, we need to plan. Thank you. Yes. That's all I have. Yeah. Yeah. So it's in the middle. We said we would be back anyways. So here's what I say we do.

unknown

Oh man.

Alan

So someone can knock on the door and say, like, oh, we have um Argo. Arg Argo? Agro. Aggro. We've got aggro's body. Um, and it's just like a duffel bag wrapped up. Like there's nothing in there. It's the explosives. But while that's happening. Yeah, it's great. Oh, that's really good. It's the explosives. And there's a timer on the street. So, but before any of that happens, somebody else snuck around. Because we went in through the kitchen first. We did. Mm-hmm. And there's access doors out uh outside of each room, correct? And there's windows.

Wylie

But there's windows, there's exterior access room.

Alan

So someone on the outside could see inside the kitchen to make sure no one's in there.

Gordon

Real quick. The way this looks like it's set up. Well, I guess there's uh these are there wouldn't be any way to like just literally enter into the ice room. Yeah, never mind.

Wylie

Um yeah, the ice room in particular does not have a strictly external door.

Mimir

Um but it does have windows, right?

Wylie

I thought each of each of the rooms had Yeah, each of the room had windows. Um each of the rooms does have windows. And you know that they didn't like the ice room, but um, they also told you not to turn the thermostat to be warmer because that would liquefy the gelatinous cube. Um and so maybe I'm one thing.

Alan

Oh, well the one the uh the one room's completely destroyed. Like the windows were cracked open. Where is it?

Wylie

Um that was the the one research lab. So the first room was the utility room, and then you went up to the dog kennels.

Alan

Yep.

Wylie

Um the utility room was fairly cold, but mostly because the heat was off. The dog kennels had smashed windows, the lab above it had smashed windows. So even though you guys got the heat back on, um, probably the main rooms that they'd be able to access is utility, the cavern room, the sleeping quarters, the two rec rooms, and the kitchen. Or the the kind of study rec room, and then the game room. Um so those would be the main spaces that they would be able to access. So the acid lab, the ice room lab, the uh jelly lab, the and the dog kennels would all be pretty um cold still.

Gordon

Is that the so just for me to clarify that's the type top right room, the one below it?

Wylie

And the one below it?

Gordon

Oh, and the dog kennels. Those are all yeah.

Wylie

These are all of them on the far right, except for the bottom most one, because that's the utility room, and then obviously the ice room. So the dog kennels would have an exterior door, absolutely. So the dogs don't have to go all the way through the labs and stuff. Right. Um, so you could enter through the dog kennels, which would be cold, and then you can't.

Alan

I guess if they're still down in the cavern. Yeah. They wouldn't answer last time. Because we knocked.

Jared

Well, you did turn on the heat.

Gordon

We did turn on the heat. So any any of those rooms before, I would say that they would be fine. Do we want to stick with the distraction option? Honestly, I would say we just go in through the cold rooms that they're not gonna go into. Yeah. Alright. So, wait.

Wylie

Sorry, I'm just moving.

Gordon

Oh, you're placing them.

Wylie

I'm not exact this is not uh canon. I'm just getting them out of the way. Um That's what the DM says.

Gordon

It's not canon.

Wylie

Well, they'll only take time to cover it all, but um this will probably work good. Okay.

Gordon

You also need to get Jared out of the way.

Wylie

Jared's gone. Sorry, Jared. Um and then we just need.

Gordon

I would just say we walk around to either dog kennels or the other one to access the ice room. Or if it'd be worth it to uh shut off the heat. Well, we're about to blow it up, so unless you don't want to do that.

Alan

No, I do, but not right away. Because we still have to get in there and get the ice. Right, right. I would say we get in, get the ice, I get out and get the gelatinous cube outside. Right. That's what I'm saying.

Gordon

Do we know how much the cube weighs?

Wylie

Let me see how big it is.

Mimir

If it's a regular gelatinous cube, it's uh size large. But they can also be cut down into smaller pieces. So it just depends on what form they have.

Wylie

Um you guys took everything off of Jared, including the fire knife.

Jared

Yes.

Wylie

And it appeared that the fire knife had been used to cut the gelatinous cube Ice form.

Alan

Okay

Wylie

Yeah. So based on this um I think probably in discussing this with Java, Java would share this information. Now he knows we're talking about a cube and we're going to retrieve a cube. Um so a trait of the cube is that it is able to fill an entire space and is transparent. So if you even if you got a small portion of the cube, it could expand and um fill a space. Um so you don't necessarily need the entire thing. Okay. So um who's going where? What are you guys doing?

Alan

I've got invisibility, so I could sneak in and hold the knife, which would still be invisible. Yeah. So I could go get it while you guys want to maybe draw their attention away. If possible. Like if we ru I'll go in and you somebody goes in with me. And that way if they see you, you can walk away from me, take them away while I go in and get so I'm going in with you. Maybe you, yeah. Yeah, and then we could just have Pyra just set up explosives.

Wylie

Mm-hmm.

Gordon

That'd be possible. Because she could probably just do it from outside, right?

Wylie

Mm-hmm.

Alan

Yeah, she she so because if you blow up the buildings, like the cold's gonna get um all they could do is hide into the cavern at that point. And she said she's got enough to even blow up down there. She should blow up everything because that's what I ordered. That is what you ordered. It's what I was a good guy.

Wylie

So do you want her to plant um external charges as well as like cavern charges?

Alan

So we're not gonna knock. We're just gonna

Gordon

No, we're just gonna sneak in, okay, get the cube.

Wylie

So everybody roll stealth. And Pyra's gonna roll as well.

Mimir

Do you want me to roll for somebody?

Gordon

I got a 19.

Wylie

Okay.

Alan

I've got an eight, but I'm also invisible.

Wylie

Y es, you have advantage. You can roll again. Twelve. Okay, you pass. It was ten because they're not in they're not in any of the rooms that you guys are entering. It's stormy. So you made it. Um and so Pyra is going around the external, and so you guys enter through the dog kennels.

Alan

Um, can you get from the dog kennels to the ice room? You can. Then yes. Then yes. Yeah.

Wylie

So you enter in dog kennels, you guys go into the ice room, super stealthy.

unknown

Yes.

Gordon

Okay, everything.

Wylie

Yeah, you guys see the cube there. It's frozen. The heat has not been turned on in this room. They didn't enter it. They didn't want the cube to be thawed out, so they've left it alone.

Gordon

Okay. So you cutting off.

Alan

I'll just get a like as big as a chunk as I can carry, I guess.

Gordon

Yeah. And I'll do the same. Okay.

Wylie

Like like one that both of you can kind of carry.

Gordon

Yeah, we could do one that was that both carry. Right. Or or you could do two separate cubes.

Wylie

Yeah, you could even do two separate cubes, something like that.

Gordon

Yep.

Wylie

Okay.

Gordon

And then we walk out.

Wylie

Okay. Yeah. You guys can sneak back out. You got a really high stealth check, and Java's waiting with the sled.

Gordon

Love every self actually aren't checking. Yeah. Oh, that was easy. I don't know. I do this more often. Yeah, our plan worked. Interesting.

Wylie

Um.

Gordon

So we get back out to the sled.

Wylie

Yes. Get back out to the sled. And um, can you tell me odds or evens?

Jared

Uh evens.

Wylie

Okay, evens. Okay. And call it again. Odd. Odd this time.

unknown

Yeah.

Wylie

Okay. So that was luck checks to see if Bojangles found you. So I'm just letting you know that's what it was rolling for. Okay, so you guys get to the sled.

Mimir

You guys I just imagine the most that and it's acid, so it's just like a greenhouse smoke. Oh, that's it.

Wylie

You guys get back to the sled all sneaky. Um, you know, uh let's see. Alan hops in. He pulls his cozy little hat down.

Alan

He pulls the strings so that the hood gets real small in the circle shape over his nose.

Wylie

He's got mittens on.

Alan

Yeah.

Wylie

Um Java Java's hopped on the front. Pyras standing on the back of the um where the driver normally stands on the sled to direct it. And um, you know, you guys start to pull away. Gordon, Gordon's on skis behind. Yeah, amazing. And and then um Dr.

Alan

Fizzard says Oh yes, please. Blow it.

Wylie

We zoom in, and then Dr. Fizzard says, he says, blow it. You guys speed away, and the most epic explosion happens behind you.

Alan

I cast, I cast slow on the on the explosion. Slow move.

Wylie

Glowing green and purple smoke rises. First flames, and then this glowing green cloud almost looks like its own aurora behind you, rising. As you guys don't even look back. As you just power off through the snow all the way back to your own base.

Alan

That isn't tight. That's tight.

Wylie

Couldn't have gone better. You arrive back at your own base. Unfortunately, when we called odds, it was even. When we called even, it was odds.

Alan

So oh man, the luck is starting to turn. That's okay. I want to be a good guy.

Mimir

I'm not the DM. I'm not the DM.

Wylie

So when you guys return to the base, um Bo Jengles has been wandering around the hallway.

Alan

Shutting windows.

Wylie

Shutting any windows, doesn't know where anybody's gone. He's trying to find anyone. He's trying to find anyone to turn and doesn't know what to do. So we might have some issue with some more chickens. Um, I guess I should roll for chickens. Odds are evens.

Mimir

Oh, evens.

Alan

You know chickens are roll for chickens.

Wylie

ODDS! He cannot catch a single chicken. Yeah. Those chickens are smart. Yeah.

Mimir

They cut on after the third one. It was just like, but and they're way faster. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Wylie

So with time on your side, you guys are able to take the gelatinous cubes into the research lab. Um, you're able to thaw them out, reassemble them. Um, Java has some safety measures in place to prevent this cube from getting out of hand because it can suck you into it.

Alan

Right.

Wylie

So um he worked out a setup, a temporary setup for it, and he's like, uh, we're gonna have to put this thing outside immediately as soon as we're dead. You've seen it. So I'm gonna say he um you guys set up like kind of a like a sled that it's on inside so that you can slide it in and out of the lab without touching it. I think you guys would since everyone is kinda incapacitated and you just avoid bojangles, you get on into the lab, you get it all set up, and so what do you do to uh first potentially?

Gordon

I would actually probably go share Jared. Yeah, yeah. We probably want to grab first to go Okay. Yeah, do we throw him into the cube? Is that what Java's? I mean, what would you do?

Alan

Well, he would want to know how the handbook says to throw somebody in the street. Well he would.

Gordon

Okay, Java, do we just throw him into the cube? What what do we do?

Java Script

I mean, this is only a uh a hypothesis, so I don't know.

Alan

You're gonna stir the units a high does acid burn rope.

Wylie

Yeah, it would burn rope.

Jared

Yeah, it burns everything.

Gordon

Well technically though, I mean can you remind me what Java's

Java Script

uh the hypothesis is that um the this uh matter, this foreign matter, um it will leave its host if its host is no longer a compatible host. So if the host is being consumed by acid, it's gonna want to get out of that environment. So I think if we stick Jared into this cube, that this alien material will then leave his body. And then if we extract him before the acid kills him, that's the thing is how do you extract him because that's what and then pull him out.

Gordon

So Okay. So what about mage hand? Can mage hand go through? Ten pounds. That's all I can do with mage hand. Right, but you need damage, also the mage hand. But magic do not take damage. I mean cut him out with the knife, the flame knife again. I mean, there is that

Wylie

so typically a um an individual that is within the cube can make a DC twelve strength check to get out. So I would say if you guys are willing to risk some acid damage yourselves, you could put your hands in.

Alan

Oh, yeah. And pull it up. I will before we do that, I will cast uh mage armor on myself.

Wylie

Okay. Mage armor.

Mimir

Just in case this fails.

Wylie

And you could use something a little sturdier, um, like maybe some chains, handcuff, right? Yeah.

Mimir

Oh, I think the handcuffs will technically be uh like arcane based because we're so they're magical.

Wylie

And I think it does not I think it doesn't do damage to magic things.

Mimir

Yep, it does not do uh damage to anything magical. Okay. But mine clothes are not doing great up.

Wylie

Yeah.

Gordon

Do you want to come out naked or alive? Yeah.

Wylie

So you can shove uh you could theoretically shove him in with a handcuff, you know, fully putting the whole hand inside and then hold on to the other handcuff and pull him out without having to put yourself in.

Gordon

And I'm assuming Okay. And so yeah, since that's a acid thing, the the mushrooms aren't gonna be able to get out of you. Right. Or it'll just fizzle out. Oh, sorry, and a kill with it to you. So let's do that. Let's give him a little bit sauce him in there with the hands. Um I've got 16 armor class now. Uh I'll I don't mind doing it just because I have high HP being the one to throw them in with him handcuffed to me. Okay. That's awesome. Okay. Yep.

Jared

Ah, buddy.

Wylie

So you shove Jared into this giant cube, and for a moment his body is just floating in this transparent green jelly. And then the jelly starts making this fizzling sound, and you see this the purple jelly just coming out of his body from every pore, uh, from his ears, just coming out of his body. It almost like jelly being mixed with jelly, it almost kind of looks like a purple smoke, even as it's just exiting in any way that it can. Um, and it comes out of his body and immediately dissolves within the green cube. It is highly sensitive to this acidic nature. And um, Jared, you are going to take um, because you're in there, you're gonna take three D6 acid damage. Okay. Um, so let me get some D6 here. I'll find my greatest looking ones. Nice. Okay.

Mimir

This is technically an attack.

Wylie

Okay, you take 12 acid damage. Okay. Um and at that point, you guys no longer see any more purple coming out of his body. You can pull him on out. You have to mean DC twelve um strength check.

Gordon

DC twelve. To pull him out.

Mimir

Uh and then I'll bonus action help. So you get advantage.

Gordon

Oh, I got a 19. 19. You pulled Jared's.

Wylie

Jared, you can't remember anything that happened. You just remember that you were going to the dog kennels to get Finn to help you identify any potential uh any potential, you know, body snatched individual, and that's the last thing you remember was going to the kennels. So now you wake up in a cube of acid handcuffed to Gordon.

Jared

Oh well, uh what's up, guys?

Alan

We need to go get the other guys. We need to go get um Nar and Bo.

Wylie

Well, and you hear you hear boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, and you see at the window, you see Bo Jangles' face, and he's like, um, hey, what what are you guys doing in there?

Jared

Actually, that's a good point. We have just the recipe for you, Mr. Jangles.

Alan

I cast hold person on the nails. There we go.

Wylie

All right, he's gonna roll his wisdom save.

Alan

Uh is it a wisdom?

Wylie

I believe so.

Alan

Yeah, it is a wisdom saving.

Wylie

Not good.

Alan

Perfect. It is wisdom.

unknown

Cool.

Wylie

Yeah, he rolled a six, so I don't think he's very wise. Grab him. Yeah, you got him.

Alan

Throw him in. Yeah, we'll do the thing.

Gordon

Okay, can't so then just send him through.

Wylie

I assume just for good measure, you guys torch all the rest of the chickens. Oh, I mean, you could actually the chicken wouldn't survive.

Mimir

What we'll do is we'll bring a dog around and get down again. Yeah, the original plan. Exactly. The original plan was that.

Gordon

So Bo is good. And so now we need to go get Gnar.

Wylie

Yep, and you can do the same thing with Gnar. He was unconscious to start, so it works pretty quickly. And you have saved your entire staff.

Alan

We didn't have to kill anybody.

unknown

No, we did kill the other Base.

Mimir

Let me tell you the we're getting double time.

Gordon

But I will say they told us to do it. They did tell us to do it. They did tell us to do it. Yeah, we're just following orders. Yeah.

Alan

And aggro was not my fault. Yeah.

Jared

That's my fault. I live with that killer.

Alan

I never, I never missed on a whole person. That's crazy. That's crazy.

Wylie

So you guys have saved your base. You're you're pretty relieved. You're pretty happy. The sun starts to rise. The storm has cleared. The um ice crystals are sparkling. It's so cold that the air, the little bit of moisture that's in the air, is sparkling as well. And it just feels like a whole fresh new day.

Jared

I actually don't mind the cold anymore.

Gordon

That's when uh Gordon just whispers at the cup and goes, Kavas. And then begins to sip Kavas.

Wylie

Kavas from the infinite gulp.

Alan

Alan retires. Uh he's like Gretfire.

Jared

Jared also retires.

Gordon

Gordon actually just walks away because he thinks he lives right down the road. He just starts walking. He's like, all right, I'm going to head home, guys. It was a fun time.

Jared

What a hero.

Wylie

So you guys do have to wait um almost two whole weeks to be picked up by the. But you guys get the information back. You get some information through about the other base, so there isn't a but um, at least as far as you know, there's no war between the the Nomish Dwarven Alliance.

Jared

That's crazy that they uh they glue up randomly. Well about that, but thank you so much.

Mimir

We appreciate it. Thank you. Yeah, you're awesome Wylie

Wylie

Yeah. This is really fun, guys. I'm glad we landed that ship.

Kipo

Yes, yes, worked out really well, actually. And changed two of Mimir's car tires.

Wylie

So if you want to hear our chit chat and debrief of this fun, um, I think five-episode mini-series, um, check out our bonus episodes behind the blunders that will be available on our Patreon. And we do have a major campaign coming soon. So if you liked this little sample, we have a much longer story planned. Um, so please subscribe so you don't miss anything. That's it for now. Thanks.

Gordon

Thank you, everybody. See ya!

Alan

Oh, what?

Jared

What just what just happened? Hey! Dr. Fizzard! What? We just ended our our one one one off series!

Gordon

But are you falling asleep again?

Jared

No, I I was awake the whole time! What? You can't fall asleep, we have so much more to go! We have a full campaign coming! What do you mean? Yeah! Checking it out! And we have behind the scenes things. Like five if you pay five dollars a month, you'll get episode art and free episodes of Behind the Blunders.

Java Script

Well, to be clear, that would be on the Patreon.

Jared

Oh, that's my bad. I'm just a security guard.

Gordon

If you want, you can just send Gordon the $5. It uh he'd take care of you, he send you food, you know, no problem. No problem.

Alan

Oh, okay. Well, I have to ask Sandy if she's got any any of my uh any of my allowance for this month, but that that that sounds like a pretty good deal.

Jared

Alright, back to locking up all the doors. We got an emergency 1843 coming on this way.

Gordon

Where's my spice?