Blunders and Dragons

C1 E3: Crikey!

• Blunders and Dragons LLC • Season 2 • Episode 3

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In episode 3 of our Campaign our adventurers enter the mysterious and fortified cottage hoping to find food, friends and something familiar to unlock their forgotten past. 

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Wylie:

You are welcome, listeners, to hear this tale. But fair warning, this adventure is not for the faint of heart. For while this story is fiction, it is also true. And the ending is not happy.

Brad/Morpheus:

Hey guys, I'm Brad, and I play Morpheus.

Kipo/Cobble:

I'm Kipo and I play Cobble.

Mimir/Zard:

I'm Mimir and I play Zard Mython.

Wylie:

And I'm Wylie Sloane your host in DM. This is Blunders and Dragons. Alright.

Wylie:

Our party has left the road. You recently came through the town of Erewhon, which was spooky and creepy, but you were directed towards this cottage that sits outside of town. And as you approach it, it doesn't look that welcoming. There are dark, heavy shutters. There's not much light peeking through those windows. There's a little bit of smoke coming out of the chimney. And that's the really the only sign of life that indicates to you that it seems like someone's home. You guys walked up to the door and bravely knocked on it. And the little hatch opened in the door, an eyeball peered out, and you heard a voice that said, Oh, Crikey, Sheila, come take a look at this. And just after that, you see another eyeball pop into the window, and it's a yellow eye with like the little black slit up in the middle. And then you hear the door shut, the little window shut, and you hear a lot of it sounds like a ton of locks are being undone on the other side and blockades. And um you hear, "I'll get the door open for you in a minute". And then um the door swings open into a rather dark entryway. And you can see that it's a small square mud room type space, and there's another door on the back. So you can't even see a figure at this point.

Mimir/Zard:

Well, it's very nice to meet you. Uh I'm Zard Mython. Uh we've had quite a long day, and the town hasn't been so friendly. Um and we're wondering if uh we could um stay the night um in your uh humble abode.

Wylie:

Okay. You can't see anything, but you hear me.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, I'm just speaking to the dark doorway.

Wylie:

So the second shut door, and uh you hear voices, "all right, shut the door behind you and set down your gear".

Mimir/Zard:

Alright. Thank you for uh helping us in. Uh I I will walk in. Actually,

Brad/Morpheus:

I I'm pretty sure Morpheus would just walk in before. Yeah. Yeah, he's he's like,

Mimir/Zard:

I kind of look to walk in and I look at you and I'm like, oh, you're a leader. You're a leader, you got this.

Wylie:

So Morphean goes, Morpheus steps in first. Yeah. Does Zard come in?

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah. Zard will come in. Okay. Uh and I think you're right on my shoulder, right, Cobble? I can't remember.

Wylie:

If he was, he would definitely bang into the doorframe because you're like seven foot.

Kipo/Cobble:

Yeah, let's do that.

Mimir/Zard:

Awesome. I duck down and I'll be like, I'll lift Cobble off of my shoulder as we get in. I'm like, oh, it's cozy in here.

Brad/Morpheus:

Sorry, I just get the mental image of Zard just walking in and just like Cobble just falling off the bat. It's like a really far fall for him. Like a Gandalf situation where he hits his head every single time. Yeah. Cobble's just laying on the stay on like the Oh, sorry about that, friend.

Wylie:

Just laying flat on the doorstep on his back. Okay, you guys come on and do you shut the door behind you as instructed? Yeah. Okay. Alright, so it's very dark. Um, do you set down your gear? I mean, that was also a part of the instructions.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, why not? I mean, I'm not really afraid of anybody.

Wylie:

Okay.

Mimir/Zard:

Um and I can cast uh yeah. So I'll keep my book, but everything else I'll I'll just a square room?

Wylie:

Yeah, just like a mud room.

Mimir/Zard:

What's in there?

Wylie:

Um benches and like hooks to hang stuff, but there's no boots or anything currently sitting there. No coats. Na-ah. But it's a space to do that. Yeah. And then of course you can see the back side. As you shut the door, you can see the back side of it, and you can see all the locks and mechanisms and stuff that were in there. If you want to give me a perception check.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, can I make an arcana check actually to see if any of them are magical? Like they're gonna lock behind us.

Wylie:

So Zard's doing arcana. And if anyone Oh baby!

Mimir/Zard:

Natural 20, baby. Can't wait to find out there's no magical lock. But I'm calm.

Wylie:

Yeah, so in fact, there is zero magic in this. I'm like, but you are confident. You are sure there's no magic.

Mimir/Zard:

I'm uh I'm so positive. Man, that's really me to roll a natural on a worthless thing.

Wylie:

Does anyone want to give a perception check to see what else might be in the room? Since there's definitely a behind it.

Brad/Morpheus:

Yeah, I would definitely do a perception check. With a tin. Oh wait, hold on. Perception. Wisdom based. Oh, 15.

Wylie:

Pretty good. Okay. Cobble, did you roll a perception check too?

Kipo/Cobble:

No.

Wylie:

Cobble doesn't care.

Brad/Morpheus:

Yeah, cobble's looking at stones or something, bro. Is the floor made out of like uh stone? Yeah. It's like he's just looking at the floor.

Wylie:

It's a stone floor entryway. So yeah.

Brad/Morpheus:

He's actually really sad. They're just it's like all dead. Yeah. This is not natural. They're not free to move.

Wylie:

Um so you hear the door in front of you. It sounds like that one's being unlatched and it's gonna open on up into the rest of the cottage. But as you're looking towards that and about to move forward, you do clock that there is a murder hole above you guys.

Brad/Morpheus:

A what now?

Wylie:

A murder hole. This is a standard feature. No, I don't know if it's so standard, but it's a feature of castles.

Brad/Morpheus:

You don't have to where maybe I do, and I just don't know what it is.

Wylie:

Every Alaskan home has one

Mimir/Zard:

everybody has murder holes.

Wylie:

Um murder hole is a feature of castles where um you maybe enemies or someone can come into the entryway, and then there's essentially an open trapdoor above them, sometimes it's grated, where the defenders of the castle could pour oil, shoot arrows, that kind of thing on anybody who came in. So you do clock that there is one of those to their mud room. Um and you because with a 15 that's pretty high, you detect, you can't exactly see, but you detect that there are people up there. No one is attacking you right now, but you sense that they were ready to if you didn't follow directions.

Mimir/Zard:

I thought it was gonna be like I put Cobble in like a vent up there, and then it's like he's following in a vent, like alien isolation style.

Wylie:

But with that, the door opens on up to the cottage. And so a second heavily armored door opens for you, and the light of the cottage floods um, you guys, it comes into the mud room. And um, as you and as you step forward and enter the home, you sense a sense of warmth and safety that you haven't felt at all since you've woken up. You felt really on edge, you're in a different place, you don't know who you are, and then Erewhon W certainly set you on edge as well. Everybody that you met there wanted something from you or didn't care about you at all and was too focused on their own thing.

Brad/Morpheus:

Um and so Especially that Lumumu kid. Yeah.

Mimir/Zard:

We're gonna get some. That's side quest material.

Wylie:

So despite the imposing exterior and the heavy shutters, um, you enter this home and it feels like a cozy oasis. Uh there's a fire crackling in the stone fireplace. It's very homey. There's a hand-carved kitchen table, there's a bunch of comfy chairs in the corner. In the kitchen, there's bunches of dried herbs and sausages that hang along a wall, and the whole room just smells like freshly baked bread.

Mimir/Zard:

Can I make uh a perception check to see how many individuals would live here, counting chairs? Um chairs or like if there's any boots or footprints or anything like that around.

Wylie:

Yeah, sure. Yeah, go ahead. And anyone else who wants can make a perception check as well.

Mimir/Zard:

I'm using my big middle d should I not have Oh, that's not bad. That's good. Yeah.

Brad/Morpheus:

T hat's uh Yep, that's an eight.

Mimir/Zard:

Uh 24.

Wylie:

All right. With the 24, you just you believe maybe about five people live in this home.

Mimir/Zard:

Okay. Um, which would potentially kind of how big are the chairs and stuff? Would it be like five medium creatures, or are there like some uh halflings or anything like that?

Wylie:

Yeah, so as as the door is opened, you're able to see at least two of the individuals.

Mimir/Zard:

Yep.

Wylie:

And so one is the guy, the guy voice that you heard, so that's a half elf.

Mimir/Zard:

Okay.

Wylie:

Um, and then you see that there's a woman that looks like a gnome. Okay.

Mimir/Zard:

Uh some shorter.

Wylie:

Yeah. So some of the chairs are shorter, and and there is a variety. There's some tall chairs and some short chairs. Um, but just kind of based on, you know, with that high of a check and you're hearing some footsteps upstairs, plus the two people that you see, you think, okay, I think there's five people in the home at least right now. Cool. And with your lower perception check, you are first just kind of overwhelmed by like, oh wow, this seems like a great, like, wonderful home. You're like, man, those those cushy chairs, like you being a teenager, you just kind of want to go flop down on it.

Brad/Morpheus:

Uh Coco. Yeah. Morpheus thinks there's only one person that lives here, although two people answered the door. They're visiting. Yeah, yeah. They're on vacation. They don't live here. Yeah. It's an Airbnb. It's an Airbnb. Yeah, that makes sense.

Wylie:

So I will bring up um a picture. Let's, if you go to Owlbear Rodeo, I will bring up what this home looks like really quick, and so the individuals that you're gonna see.

Mimir/Zard:

Ooh, this is fun. Should I describe?

Wylie:

Yeah, you can describe. It's it's fairly similar to what I've already described. Um, but then we'll also we'll describe first the man and the um gnome woman in a second. Um, because I will say this is what Morpheus notices the most. The guy that opened the door is an elf, and he has a very crocodile dundee kind of looks. I brought up a bigger picture of him on the side, and he has a big lizard on his shoulders, like a big um iguana, like almost gatory-looking iguana. And you realize that the uh yellow eye that you saw peeking through the hole was actually from the lizard. It wasn't his wife t

Brad/Morpheus:

Was there a shorter little uh there was many? We didn't see it, we just saw the yellow eye.

Wylie:

Yeah, you just saw the yellow eye at the normal height one.

Mimir/Zard:

Wow.

Wylie:

Um so then there's a picture of his gnomish wife. She looks a she has like a little bit of a Mila Kunis look to her. And she has colorful, cozy kind of felt clothing. Um, she has some pretty blue and red clothing as well as various belts and buckles. Um, she looks really handy. Um, she looks like she's um uh a really good at, you know, maybe crafting and and making stuff like that. And so you haven't seen any other individuals yet.

Mimir/Zard:

Um is he currently armed when we walk in?

Wylie:

Oh yeah, he's got knives at his waist.

Mimir/Zard:

Uh does he have his bow on you uh on the He doesn't have a bow.

Wylie:

He just has, you know, he's inside, so he has close combat kind of stuff. Um still, you know, he's still cautious. Um, but through that hole, he was able to see that your guys' eyes are not fully black, yeah, like the people of the town. So he has a sense that you are not gonna be as threatening.

Mimir/Zard:

And they have blacks just on the edge, not fully, correct?

Wylie:

Um yeah, so you, if you want to take a closer look at his eye.

Mimir/Zard:

I go up to him and I shake his hand, but I'm just like staring at him. That's like Zard Mython, nice, nice to meet you, as I'm kind of like looking at him. And eight.

Wylie:

Eight. Um yeah, so you can tell they're not fully black. Okay, there's not a big it's not like completely black pupils, like you had seen before. Um that's a start. And as you slowly start to notice that there are more animals in this room. Um a chinchilla hops across the floor and it stops and it picks up something in its tiny little hands and nibbles, and he starts it starts sniffing in your direction, and then it hops off and it squeezes under one of the cabinets.

Mimir/Zard:

I take out a berry and I'm like trying to gall right.

Wylie:

Um there's also two river otters that are wrestling playfully in the

Mimir/Zard:

uh guys, this is the end of the campaign.

Brad/Morpheus:

Sorry for it. Yeah, sorry. We made it. We did it. We're home. Big bad is leaving this house. It's not even a person, it's leaving.

Wylie:

I made a trap for you. Yeah, exactly. Uh up in the rafters are two capuchin monkeys. Um I don't know if you guys have ever seen George the Jungle, but it's kind of the typical black and white monkey that you see in a lot of TV shows and movies. It's like the cute little one.

Brad/Morpheus:

Or uh night at the museum. Yeah. Yeah.

Wylie:

Kabuchin, is that how you say it? Yeah.

Brad/Morpheus:

That's how I've heard it said. I don't know whether I'm right or not. Yeah.

Wylie:

And there's also a variety of geckos and lizards crawling around on the walls and up in the rafters and stuff. So that's that's something that you guys can see as well as the the general vibe of the cabin.

Mimir/Zard:

Is there hunted animals also? Um like the in the picture, there's like a deer skin, is what it looks like.

Wylie:

Yeah, there are there are animal skins and stuff around too.

Mimir/Zard:

So they're not just like not hunters.

Wylie:

Yeah, and you notice that there's like sausages, so um, like hanging in the kitchen and stuff, so it it seems that they're not vegans necessarily, but they do seem to and you don't know if they were necessarily hunted and harvested animals, or if it's like, hey, deceased, you know. And um, if they harvested, you know, like kind of roadkill situation. Yeah. Perhaps. Um, but they do they don't seem to be, you know, worry about wearing leathers and um fur or anything like that. Uh he they both they all definitely have leather as a part of their clothing and stuff too.

Mimir/Zard:

Cool. Well, it's so nice to meet you. Um Zard. Uh this is uh my my friend. Uh I'll let you guys introduce yourselves.

Brad/Morpheus:

Oh hey, I'm uh I'm I'm Morpheus.

Wylie:

G'day? And then he looks down at uh cobbling's like, "and where do you come from, then little fella?"

Kipo/Cobble:

I'm trying to think of where he would be in this house. Yeah. Yeah, but that's like molded stones. He's more interested in in the pure st raw earth material. Yeah. Um I don't know. We've been pretty hungry. Yeah, we've only eaten berries. So I think I think Cobble at this point would be maybe just like gazing up at the the meats that are hanging from the wall. Okay. Just like, uh So I I would say he did not hear the question.

Wylie:

The question. Okay.

Mimir/Zard:

Yep. And uh so This is my uh friend uh cobble. Um huh? Yes, Cobble. Um just wanted to introduce ourselves since we're you know home.

Kipo/Cobble:

Hi, whose meat is this?

Wylie:

Um and and the guy would say, "G'day, I'm Bruce. This is my wife Sheila, and these are my boys."

Mimir/Zard:

Bruce and Sheila. Hello, my name's Bruce. My name's Bruce. Fish are friends.

Wylie:

And uh he would gesture to his sons who are now coming down from the upstairs. It seems like they, you know, realized that everything was kind of okay. And uh so he introduces his boys.

Mimir/Zard:

Oh but it's been my and uh he says heroes.

Wylie:

"These are my sons."

Mimir/Zard:

These are the most wildly attractive and then a frightening image. Really wild. Okay.

Wylie:

So he introduces their names and I'll read them in order of the images that you're seeing. He says their names are Bieber, Bacon, and Babio.

Mimir/Zard:

Oh no.

Wylie:

And you want to see?

Mimir/Zard:

Wait, are they all Justin Bieber? Like uh hold on, okay, okay. That's why.

Wylie:

So the one one son seems to take off a little bit more after his mother. Yeah, okay. Yeah. So he's the gnomish one.

Brad/Morpheus:

But he has a beard, and I totally thought I was like, it just looks like a child with a beard. That's literally a child with a beard and pointy ears. It's a cosplay. Cosplayer. He's cosplaying. He's got a fake beard on. He's my boy.

Wylie:

So that's Bieber.

Brad/Morpheus:

And he looks like Justin Bieber in fakes.

Wylie:

He does resemble Justin Bieber. He's youthful. Um and then the middle son is Bacon, someone with the red hair.

Mimir/Zard:

And um, is that Zach Efron on the right, or is that also Justin Bieber?

Wylie:

I can't. They're not actually images of those.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, okay, sure.

Brad/Morpheus:

With Bacon, I was literally like, is it Kevin Bacon? Like I'm but I was thinking this famous person.

Wylie:

And then the last one is Bobbio. So a similar he has he has Fabio B. Fabio, buty hair. Bacon is um he's burly, he has red hair and a red beard, and um he looks pretty strong, and then Babio kind of takes the most off of his father with elvish looks, and he has long flowing blonde hair and a trim beard and mustache.

Mimir/Zard:

Dang. What a hero.

Wylie:

And so that's what the sons look like. So he's now introduced his family to you guys.

Brad/Morpheus:

It looks like if if Legolas had uh had a beard like a goatee type thing, yeah. Uh, and wore his hair down, not yeah.

Wylie:

Yeah, not the half-up-lock.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah. Don't have any daughters, huh? No, I'm just joking. I'm just joking. Uh well, it's very nice to meet you all. Um I'd be sorry to intrude, but the town is just awful. Just terrible. I'm just gonna be honest with you. I hated it.

Wylie/Bruce:

"Ah, you came to the town there. That was a bit iffy".

Brad/Morpheus:

Well, we we um hmm. Well, we we tried to we we honestly don't know who we are or where we come from. Like, I I still don't know what's going on. I I I just learned these guys' names today. Uh, and but apparently we were all together when we woke up in a cave.

Mimir/Zard:

So I don't know how to make this sound not weird.

Wylie/Bruce:

Um a bit of a party gone wrong then.

Mimir/Zard:

Well, maybe actually that could be an option, um, but I'm not totally sure.

Brad/Morpheus:

That would be one wild part if I I still can't remember who I am the next day.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, that seems a little bit wild. Um Yeah, uh could you uh just uh I'm curious. Uh individuals with black eyes, do you know anything about that?

Wylie/Bruce:

Or Right, like in the town.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah. Oh, we're just wondering what that's about. We don't have black eyes, but But we can give you one no, I'm just kidding. Well, I only can give I only have one. I have one eye. So we don't have black eyes, and I don't I have a black eye, but that's because of a different brain.

Wylie:

He does he does eye your eye patch a little bit.

Mimir/Zard:

Do you want me to see under?

Wylie:

Yeah, and he nods.

Mimir/Zard:

And then it's like pfft. And underneath there's just a hole.

Wylie:

Just a hole.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, it's a hole with three massive um like dragon or uh big claw like marks across his eye. Across. Um and you can see inside. This might be a little to the scar tissue. Yeah, to the scar tissue. Um inside his brain. Yeah, exactly. You can see that I have very few brain. My intelligence is low.

Brad/Morpheus:

He has to cover his eyes so people can't read his thoughts.

Mimir/Zard:

And then I flip it back down.

Wylie/Bruce:

Okay. And so he nods and he's like, well, "I don't reckon where it came from or where it started, but seems to be a bit of a curse on these lands".

Mimir/Zard:

Oh. From like, oh, I guess you don't know where it started, so I was gonna ask, like, where did it start? But that would be not it. Well, that's bad. Is there like an originating or like is it is there other towns? Because we're brand new to existence to kind of give you I know I don't look like it with my long black beard and all my awesome tats. Um but yeah, we're we're new to existence, so is there any that's the best way I can put it.

Brad/Morpheus:

I don't know, but at the same time, there's this kid over here that has a beard, so I don't know when he was born. Was it yesterday?

Mimir/Zard:

Remember what I said about judging people.

Brad/Morpheus:

No judgment. That's a sick beard.

Wylie/Bruce:

Um and and so he he responds, um, yeah, as as far as we've ever gone, seems that people have been affected this way.

Mimir/Zard:

And other cities like this then?

Wylie/Bruce:

Yeah, this seems to be one of the worst.

Mimir/Zard:

Oh well. You guys aren't affected by it.

Wylie:

Well I th um hang on. It's really hard to stay in this accent.

Mimir/Zard:

No, I'm just kidding.

Wylie/Bruce:

Um he says, Well, we haven't figured it out yet, but we do believe that there's a way to resist it. As you can see, we're not as bad as the lot.

Mimir/Zard:

You're right.

Wylie/Bruce:

From what we can tell, it's a death curse. We think that it will kill everybody one day.

Mimir/Zard:

That's not good.

Wylie/Bruce:

Perhaps even ourselves. But we've done our best to resist it. And in the beginning, most people were like us. But as they've given more and more into it, they become a bunch of bludgers and bogans.

Mimir/Zard:

I hate bludgers and boguners. I'm taking notes, by the way, as he's as he's writing it down.

Wylie/Bruce:

It seems that some people seem to like it, seem to th feel like it gives them some more power or freedom. We don't know, we don't mess with that.

Mimir/Zard:

That's not good. That seems ill-advised.

Wylie/Bruce:

One thing we've observed is that most people seem to really care about what they want. And they'll do anything to get it. So I think the reason it hasn't affected us as much is because we care about something beyond ourselves.

Mimir/Zard:

Oh. That's pretty good.

Wylie/Bruce:

These beauties right here, and he points to the big lizard on his shoulder. Wow.

Mimir/Zard:

That is a beautiful uh pet you have there. I don't want to assume that you have ownership over that life form. Um yeah, we we don't know what we want, so maybe that's why we're not affected at all.

Brad/Morpheus:

I mean, I kind of do want some food, but you know, uh

Mimir/Zard:

We can pay.

Wylie/Bruce:

Um and he says, Oh, well, we've already had our tea, but we can often each a sanger.

Mimir/Zard:

A who?

Wylie:

A Sangar.

Mimir/Zard:

A Sanger?

Brad/Morpheus:

I've never met her.

Wylie/Sheila:

And his his his wife steps up and says, Um, I can get a sandwich for each of you.

Mimir/Zard:

Oh, yeah. Sorry, I don't speak that language. And I don't speak down under. Yeah. Under common.

Wylie/Sheila:

Uh as you say that, she says, Oh, he's not speaking in the language he had a brain injury.

Mimir/Zard:

Oh, that stuff. I'm so sorry. I also had a brain injury. And then I pull up my my eyepatch. Okay, I really. And then I put down my eyepatch again.

Wylie:

So she um goes and grabs a sausage for each of you and sticks it in a roll and kind of essentially makes sort of like a hot dog sandwich. And um she gestures towards the table and says, Um, would you like to come sit down?

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah. I we really appreciate it. Yeah, for sure. Thanks. Yeah. Um have you uh this might be a weird question. Have you ever met any of us before?

Wylie:

Uh, you're asking the woman.

Mimir/Zard:

Just anybody in the group.

Wylie/Sheila:

Yeah. Well, since she's helping you, she says, Um, I mean, uh you you are a a bit of a unique uh group, and I don't think I've seen anyone like you before.

Brad/Morpheus:

We're one of a kind.

Mimir/Zard:

Always. Uh it's getting pretty late. Uh, I don't know if we have any more questions, uh, but I'm exhausted after that fight that we had to fight, and the other fight that we had to fight, and then we met a dinosaur. That was pretty cool.

Wylie/Sheila:

And um, so she she's kind of been looking at you guys and and keeping an eye on you too, and um, so she says, So you have no idea where you came from. You just woke up in a cave?

Mimir/Zard:

Oh man. I have like inklings of existence, but I have this book, and I pull out my massive book that I've been taking notes in. Um, and I'm like, and I don't put myself, I'm guessing, in the story. Um I put myself as different names. So you could look through and see if you recognize any of these stories, but Okay.

Wylie/Sheila:

Um she says, Um, well, we have to take care of the animals before bedtime, but might I be able to read it overnight?

Mimir/Zard:

Uh I like to keep it nice and close to me. Uh just because I you never know when a story's gonna happen.

Wylie:

Um as you're stuck in the middle of the night.

Mimir/Zard:

It's a thing, I'm hurrying her. Don't judge me. It gets really sensitive.

Brad/Morpheus:

Morpheus falls out of bed. He starts writing it down, like, oh, I gotta get this story. Exactly. Morpheus fell out of bed.

Wylie:

And so you're kind of showing the book to her. Yeah. Okay. So as you're kind of showing it to her and flipping through the pages, that folded piece of parchment that you guys found in the chest falls out onto the floor. And she just goes, Oh, whoops, and she bends over, picks it up, and hands it to you, and she keeps looking at the book.

Mimir/Zard:

Oh, right. We found this with our stuff. It's blank though, right?

Wylie:

Mm-hmm. Yeah, it's blank. Um and so she kind of looks to the pictures and um the the guys say,

Wylie/Bruce:

um, b ut we're gonna have to go take care of the animals. We'll be back in a bit.

Mimir/Zard:

Would you like help?

Wylie/Bruce:

You lot need a place to spend the night.

Mimir/Zard:

Oh, yes. Yes, please. For sure. We we don't want to take it for free, but would you if you would like some help, I'm sure he's worked a job before.

Wylie/Bruce:

You got a job.

Brad/Morpheus:

Yeah, it was like uh, you know, 15 minutes, but I was, you know, I was washing dishes. I face palm really around trying to set you up, man. It's like the one thing you don't tell your next employer, you know, like how long your job was if it was super short. Yeah.

Wylie/Bruce:

Terrible references. Uh he says, Well, that's all right. You're a guest. Shelia will get you comfortable. We'll take care of the animals and we'll all hunk it down for the night.

Mimir/Zard:

Oh, thanks so much.

Wylie:

No problem. So him and the boys set on aft out of a back door um to go take care of some animals, and um, they secured all the front doors and the second front door. Yeah, so she's just in there right now. Perfect. Um kind of to attack. And all the animals. And um so yeah, she's kind of she's sort of bustling around, just it looks like she's you know packing up some food and um she goes and like gets some there's sort of a a loungy area um by the fire with you know, essentially c sort of like mean bag chairs. Um and so she gets you guys some more bedding and and sets that all kind of out for you guys while you're sitting at the table eating your sausages and stuff.

Mimir/Zard:

I really appreciate that. Cobble. I kind of lean over to cobble if he's anywhere at the table. Are you at the table? Yeah, eating, yeah. Okay, well I lean over and I go, hey cobble, I have a question for you.

Kipo/Cobble:

What?

Mimir/Zard:

Hey, are you a magic guy? You good with magic?

Kipo/Cobble:

Who's asked?

Mimir/Zard:

I I look around because I'm like, all right, this could make it. He's like me, Zard Mython. I literally was gonna go, me.

Kipo/Cobble:

Okay, good. Yeah.

Mimir/Zard:

Uh and I'm like, I look around and it's and I slide across the table from uh from me uh the piece of paper, and I'm like, is this uh is this piece of paper magic?

Kipo/Cobble:

Yeah, I could do an arcana check.

Mimir/Zard:

Uh and I will give you Bardic inspiration. I'll be like I'll be like, there was this one time as I'm sliding uh the paper, and I'm like, I heard that uh there was a magic user that really understood um great and fantastic um magic. Because I don't know magic at all, so I just use magic five to live. Yeah, magic stuff perfect. Um and you could add a D6 if you would like to.

Kipo/Cobble:

Twenty-one.

Wylie:

Twenty-one. Okay.

Mimir/Zard:

It's not magic. There we go again.

Wylie:

That would be so mean. Um so Cobble takes this piece of paper, he holds it in his hands, and as he's seeking to detect magic in it, it feels almost warm in his hands, despite the fact that it's paper, and he is certain that this paper is magic. He holds it up, unfolds it a little bit, looks at the different sides, and you know how you open a book and you get that smell of the paper from the book? The smell that comes off this paper is like the smell as a lightning storm is coming. Or a little bit of the smell as you light a match and there's that distinct smell in the air. That's the smell that's coming off of the paper that really tells you this is magic. And with such a high roll, even though it wasn't an at 20, 21's really high, you get the idea that there are secrets in this paper that could be revealed with the correct code word.

Mimir/Zard:

Well, there's nothing throws it into the fire.

Kipo/Cobble:

I was thinking it I was just thinking that just light it on fire. No, I won't do that. Crumples it up.

Wylie:

Yeah.

Mimir/Zard:

Uh derelay that.

Wylie:

So what does cobble do?

Kipo/Cobble:

I do. I can let you know that. Uh all of what she just said. Yeah. And I'll be like, wow, that was so descriptive. Cobble. Yeah. Um venture storms.

Wylie:

Wow.

Mimir/Zard:

Um That was my last uh Bardic inspiration, by the way. So if we get into a fight, you gotta don't get Bardic. We're going to bed soon. I I also can't do any of my fancy moves. Um that someone jumps out of nowhere. Yeah, exactly. No, um I am curious, it would this be an illusory script? Because I have that spell.

Wylie:

That would allow you to cast illusory script. Yes.

Mimir/Zard:

But would it be like the same kind of feeling from when I cast something on illusionary? Like if I did an illusionary script on a piece of paper, would that be the same feeling?

Wylie:

It's probably reminiscent, but it's a little more complex than that.

Mimir/Zard:

It's like more powerful than that.

Wylie:

Yeah.

Mimir/Zard:

Okay. Well it's not glyph of warning. I'm just kidding. Not the best at this kind of thing.

Brad/Morpheus:

I I don't do any magic, so I I can't really help.

Mimir/Zard:

I hate it.

Wylie:

I hate it saying like Oh, we do need to remember that uh Morpheus' character is actually a druid. Yep. Yeah, which does do magic. And I did want to mention for you, you should probably take note of all the animals that I'm listing.

Brad/Morpheus:

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Wylie:

Because as a druid, the animals that you see inform what you can turn into later.

Mimir/Zard:

So you've said taking a list. I'm just gonna Yeah.

Wylie:

Um so I forgot to mention that earlier. And if you need me to review animals later, I can do that. But um take note. Um and you won't be able to turn into all of them right away, but you can add them to your list. And so as you guys are sitting there and kind of mulling over this paper, the guys kind of come trooping back in, and um Bruce comes on over and he's like, "you know, I was thinking, you offered to give us some help."

Mimir/Zard:

Yes, I would love to.

Wylie/Bruce:

Al'Right.

Mimir/Zard:

As long as it doesn't like kill anybody, I think.

Wylie/Bruce:

No, and he's like, no, no, no. So you really, I really want uh I really want to help this town. And I think that if people could just stop thinking about themselves and think about something else, it might help them resist this curse or illness, whatever it is. And that's why I want them to love these beautiful creatures. Because the thing is, sometimes people not very lovable, right? Especially when they're all a bunch of bludgers and bogans.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, I know I get that.

Wylie/Bruce:

"But I think if they could find wonderful creatures like this, and he he holds up the chinchilla that was sitting on the floor, and he pats the big kind of creepy lizard on his shoulder, he's like, I think that if they could really care for something that's not themselves, it might start help bringing them out of this. I don't know for sure. I've been trying to get my hands on some dinosaur eggs. Because to me, they are the most beautiful creatures."

Wylie:

Yeah, yeah.

Brad/Morpheus:

We uh actually Morpheus just glares at Zard. Your your lesson was a lie. I should have kept that egg. Dangit,

Mimir/Zard:

no, I was like, don't kidnap children. That was my lesson. And it worked out we didn't have to kill the mom. So that was pretty we had and

Wylie/Bruce:

he's and you had a dinosaur, eh?

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, we had one.

Wylie/Bruce:

What happened to it?

Mimir/Zard:

Uh well, we gave it back.

Wylie/Bruce:

Didn't cook it, did you?

Mimir/Zard:

No, absolutely not. Who would never eat a dinosaur egg? I glare back at you.

Brad/Morpheus:

No, no, no. I I gave it back to the mom. Definitely. Oh. Very gentle-like.

Wylie/Bruce:

What kind of dinosaur was it?

Mimir/Zard:

Uh four-legged, like uh Delociraptor. Or Delato.

Wylie:

It was a um Dimetrodon.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, Dimetrodon.

Wylie:

But it was so kind of like a a little bit like a it had a velociraptor face, it had squat legs, um, and then it had a big crest on its back. So you could recount what oh you can can't.

Mimir/Zard:

I have I have a picture of it.

Wylie:

Yeah, I used to. Because I drew it.

Mimir/Zard:

And I'm like, oh, where you're oh that's a good point. And I open up a picture and then I go through all the animals that we've seen. Oh, yeah, yeah. And I'm like, yeah, that's that's what I'm doing. There it is.

Wylie:

So he's real interested in your journal and he's he's checking it out and stuff.

Mimir/Zard:

If you want your own journal, I have spares. Uh oh, it's in my stuff. I would have to go grab it.

Wylie/Bruce:

That was in the mug room. And he's like, he's like, oh, that's all right. That's all right. I'm not really one for writing myself.

Mimir/Zard:

It should be good. Dream journals really help. Well, I've I'm actually I haven't fallen asleep yet, but I have a sense that it would help.

Wylie/Bruce:

All right, so you found these eggs somewhere near where you woke up.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah. We have a uh I drew a map also.

Wylie/Bruce:

Oh okay.

Mimir/Zard:

And I'll show them the map.

Wylie/Bruce:

All right.

Mimir/Zard:

Well, there's a thief that was looking for an egg or something, I'm pretty sure at some point in time. I don't know. Oh, maybe in the town, you mean? Yeah.

Wylie:

That might have been something Mr. Dagger said.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah.

Wylie/Bruce:

Um so he he says, Well, if you'd be willing to help us collect some eggs, I also know where there's a nest um by some of the flying dinosaurs. Either one would be really great.

Mimir/Zard:

They both look at each other.

Kipo/Cobble:

Cobble looks up at the ceiling.

Mimir/Zard:

Flying? Like they fly?

Wylie:

As you look up, you see a lemur. And they're after scampering around.

Mimir/Zard:

Great. He's almost as big as you. I love lemurs. Um, I'll be like, I mean, yeah, wouldn't be a a bad situation, I don't think. It's a good place to start. I really wish we knew like the epicenter of the curse or something. Like if it was like Orchest Who I am. Yeah, that that would help. But maybe we'll find maybe you're from like you were raised by flying dinosaurs. I don't know how that would make sense at all. But you never know.

Wylie/Bruce:

And uh and Bruce kind of nods and he's like, Yeah, I mean we've been looking for the source for some time and perhaps it started before we were even born. It's hard to say, but uh maybe with these small steps we can help treat the people now and find the real answers later.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah. Is there like a leader to the town of some sort?

Wylie/Bruce:

Mr. Mayor?

Mimir/Zard:

Mr. Bear. Oh yeah. No, that makes sense. Um it has a real real cocky uh voice there. Yeah, I don't know that makes sense. Yeah.

Wylie/Bruce:

Um the thing is the mayor he keeps dying. You know, there's lots of assassinations. So we just start calling him Mr. Mayor, whoever he is. Sometimes his missus. Could be anybody.

Mimir/Zard:

So they just get killed. Really bad position, like maybe security or something. Anyway, I'm not in charge. Um yeah, we could definitely take that small stuff. I mean, I'm willing. Uh let me talk to uh R and uh S over here.

Wylie/Bruce:

Well, it's getting late if you all want to sleep on it. Yeah, you know, you'll be here in the morning, we'll give you some breakfast, see if you're up for it. Cool. All right then. Um he says, Well, make yourselves comfortable. I see Sheila's gotten everything set up by the fire.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah. Thank you, Sheila. Thank you very much for your hospitality. Yeah, thanks so much. I really, really appreciate it.

Wylie/Sheila:

You're welcome. We're just happy to meet some people who don't seem to want to burn the house down and take everything from us.

Mimir/Zard:

Hey, if there's any of those kind of people, we would love to take care of it for you. Gives a wink with his one eye. Yeah, gives a wink, but it's under the eye patch. So I'm just staring awkwardly at him. With a slight grin. Yeah, exactly. I always have a grin on my face.

Wylie:

Bieber's standing there with a knife at his hip, and he's like, Well, clearly we've been able to take care of ourselves so far, but we appreciate the offer.

Mimir/Zard:

Oh, yeah, no worries. Um, obviously, Strapping, young man. Um, I'm tired. Uh and I will be tired. Uh I go and win out.

Wylie:

So that's patronizing. And he marches up the stairs.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, I get that a lot.

Wylie:

So they all kind of take off upstairs, and um there's you hear a big heavy door close at the top of the stairs, and you hear multiple locks lock. So while they've let you into their house and everything, they're not fully trusting of you. They still have a lot of security.

Mimir/Zard:

Um I will uh I am. Going to uh like sketch the house before I go to bed and the fireplace and all three of us lying down. Um but I'm gonna be like, what do we think about this uh situation, guys? This paper seems to have some kind of answers. Maybe we should just write on it. Okay. You want me to what should we write? Hello. Hello. Okay and I write hello on the piece of paper.

Wylie:

Okay.

Mimir/Zard:

And then we added it. I put it in the center. You should just say sup. Well, we maybe that's the second thing we say. Uh and then I put it in the center and we all stare at a piece of paper. Anything happens?

Wylie:

So you write hello and nothing happens.

Mimir/Zard:

I write sup.

Wylie:

You write sup. Nothing happens.

Mimir/Zard:

Uh does my ink stay? Your ink stays. That's not good. I think I wasted some paper. Um it's now not magical. Yeah, exactly.

Wylie:

Do you try to do you try to remove the ink, or are you just you're just seeing if it absorbed kind of?

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, if it absorbed.

Wylie:

It doesn't absorb.

Mimir/Zard:

Oh, okay. So I can wipe it?

Wylie:

You could try?

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, I'll I'll wipe the SUP. Sure. Because I would rather hello. Hello. Yeah.

Wylie:

Yeah, you are able to wipe it off, actually. But you're a little bit surprised by it's you know, that's not how paper works.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah. I'm the paper expert, right? Didn't need to do an arcana check. Exactly.

Wylie:

Maybe paper that had a very waxy coating could potentially do something like this. But so it's not completely foreign. Like that does not indicate magic. Um but it it seems like the paper is reacting kind of like normal paper.

Mimir/Zard:

It's warm.

Wylie:

It what yeah, when Kabul was investigating it, you probably can't detect that.

Mimir/Zard:

Okay.

Wylie:

Without doing it. It seemed it it just really seemed to give off that magical essence in every way.

Mimir/Zard:

Okay. Do you think well, so magic things don't burn. Should I throw it in the fire and just kind of corner?

Wylie:

You can yeah, you can try to rip it.

Mimir/Zard:

Try to rip off a corner. Okay. I try to rip off of uh a tiny slit of the corner.

Wylie:

Okay. You're trying to rip it and it's really it's not coming apart.

Mimir/Zard:

That's pretty nice. I could use it as a shield. Um that would be awesome. Uh I don't have my axe. I'm just like, all right.

Wylie:

Yeah, your stuff, all your weapons are locked in the mud.

Mimir/Zard:

That's right, that's right. I mean, we could unlock it. Or is there a knife on the table?

Wylie:

He is he it was locked with a key.

Mimir/Zard:

Oh, okay. So even both sides were locked.

Wylie:

Yeah. So yeah, the second door.

Brad/Morpheus:

Is there a knife on the table anywhere?

Wylie:

Um, there's probably some kitchen knives, yeah. If you want to look for one.

Brad/Morpheus:

Yeah, I'll grab it to like cut it. Yeah. Okay. See if it'll cut.

Wylie:

So are you holding it up and trying to cut it? Do you put it on the table and stab it? Or what do you do?

Mimir/Zard:

Try the stab thing and the shield. Because that would be so right.

Brad/Morpheus:

So what's gonna happen is he's just gonna I'm just gonna- No, don't stab it at me. I'm holding it up and you're like, I just try to stab right through him. Through the paper and then into him. Uh we'll see.

Mimir/Zard:

That's crazy. Uh does it pierce when I'm

Wylie:

so you're trying to stab it at him?

Brad/Morpheus:

Yes. I'm trying to stab through the paper, but he is behind it.

Wylie:

Okay, so why don't you roll a strength check for him?

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, I'm gonna step to the side as he's steering.

Wylie:

Yeah, why don't you roll a Dex check?

Mimir/Zard:

Okay. Uh great. You go first. Nice.

Wylie:

Oops.

Brad/Morpheus:

Nice, have a straight eleven.

Wylie:

An eleven strength?

Mimir/Zard:

Yep, yeah, he's not strong. This is a big acrobatics or just dex.

Wylie:

Dex.

Mimir/Zard:

Cool. Uh seven.

Wylie:

Seven. Okay. So you plun the the tip of the knife does go through the paper. It pierces through it. Um, but it he's holding it and you're and so it's kind of like wiggling around and like and the force that you put on the paper plus the force that he's put on the paper. And so with that seven, you get a scrape on your hand.

Mimir/Zard:

I'm gonna go, oh my eye! Just kidding.

Brad/Morpheus:

It's like, yeah, paper or rock or uh scissors. Scissors beats rock. Oh, that's not rock. Sorry, sorry, paper, paper.

Wylie:

Scissors beats paper.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, it doesn't be rock. Um does it did we break? Should we not have should did we break the magic? I'm looking at you, Cobble. I'm like, does it did it break the magic? Because we honestly we didn't try anything else besides hello and Nick we went. Can't we break away from you?

Kipo/Cobble:

We're just doing a process of elimination.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, well from two extremes.

Kipo/Cobble:

Would I need to do another Arcana check?

Wylie:

Yeah, you can see if it still has magic.

Kipo/Cobble:

Let's double check then. Really awkward. It doesn't? Yeah. Twelve? Twelve.

Wylie:

Okay. So you you take it from Zard and you feel it in your hands, and you sniff it again, and and you feel like the magic is still in the paper.

Kipo/Cobble:

Okay. Just have to sniff it. Okay. Just have to sniff it. That's good. I'll sniff it. It's a good motto. Yeah, just have to sniff it.

Mimir/Zard:

Okay. How do we do magic? Do you have dispel magic?

Kipo/Cobble:

I think I think we should go to bed. Alright. I think we should fold it up and literally sleep.

Mimir/Zard:

Does it still have a hole in it? Like when we take out the knife? Does it repair itself?

Wylie:

It still has a hole right now.

Mimir/Zard:

Okay. Alright, let's go.

Kipo/Cobble:

Yeah, let's see what happens.

Mimir/Zard:

Put it back in my book. In a different page than when it came out. Um just in case if somebody's gonna try to rob us or whatever. Um I will say, yeah, I will take a watch though. Okay. I'll take the first watch just in case. Because even though these people are nice, sometimes. So I'll take the first watch.

Wylie:

Okay. And are you look especially because you're probably sketching and stuff, do you probably kind of take that time to sketch and um so um everybody else settles down and goes to sleep?

Mimir/Zard:

Yep.

Wylie:

Okay. Um so how would you guys get all comfy in front of the fire? There's blankets, there's pillows, there's beanbag chair type things, there's a rug on the floor.

Kipo/Cobble:

Yeah, I'll be in front of the fire.

Brad/Morpheus:

I think that uh Morpheus would probably lay on a beanbag and pass out instantly. Just no, like no need for anything else. No, no, no blanket or anything. Just he's just out.

Mimir/Zard:

I'll do the dad nap when it's my turn. I'll lean back in a chair. Nice. You just go to go to sleep. Um also you technically don't sleep because you're an elf. You only have to sleep for four hours. So you you actually meditate, in quotation marks, which is great.

Wylie:

But like any teenager, you probably oversleep. Yeah, yeah.

Mimir/Zard:

You oversleep, so you probably sleep for five hours. But that means you can take multiple, like you can do a watch and do downtime. So you can have two hours of watch and two hours of downtime.

Wylie:

So you're gonna be taking the first watch. Are you gonna wake him up at the end of your watch?

Mimir/Zard:

It depends. It wants to it wants to Yeah, I'll I'll I'll take the next watch. Okay.

Kipo/Cobble:

I don't want to watch at all.

Wylie:

Okay how does Cobble say that?

Kipo/Cobble:

Like just like that. I don't want to watch it all. I'm gonna stay by the fire.

Wylie:

Cobble's like, nope, thank you.

Mimir/Zard:

I f you want to do last watch, then we'll do like first and last, maybe, or first and third.

Brad/Morpheus:

I I I I can take whatever watch you want.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, let's do first and third. So we'll skip them thing and then yeah.

Wylie:

So how are you gonna wake him up for a third watch?

Mimir/Zard:

Um I'll um That's a good question. How do I wake up after a nap?

Kipo/Cobble:

Um the old candle trick. Y

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, the candle trick, yeah, where it's like you put uh a piece of metal in a candle, you stick it in there and then it melts down to a certain point and then it drops the spoon or wake me up and I'll wake you up. Because I know you won't wake up from that. Right, right.

Wylie:

Okay, so let's say you um in the little the sack of coins that you got from your guys' battle in town. Yeah. So you open it up and there are three gold in there. Oh generous. You guys get three gold. Bangaro. And so one together collectively is three gold all together in the back. So you can take you can take one of those gold coins and stick it into that candle, and as the wax melts down, it'll be released when it gets there. So you can do that. So you set all that up, you're doodling in your journal, the other guys are falling asleep.

Mimir/Zard:

Trying to get the animals to like all position, and then they keep on moving. I'm like, okay, well, all right, can you just scoot sorry, uh, sorry, sorry, I know you guys are trying to sleep. I'm just trying to scoot this guy here. Come here, little boy.

Wylie:

Um And then as you're um as you're sitting there sketching, um, all of a sudden, at one point, you feel a heavy weight come down upon your shoulders. And as you're how would you react as something heavy seems to have fallen?

Mimir/Zard:

I reach for my sword that's not there and I go and I stand up and I'm like uh and I I look around. I'm like full combat mode and I have my fists up.

Wylie:

Okay, so as you stand up, you feel that weight that fell onto your shoulders fall down your back against your body and fall down at your feet behind your ankles.

Mimir/Zard:

Okay. I reach down, I I look down.

Wylie:

Okay. You look down and there's a great big python that fell out of the rafters and it fell onto your shoulders.

Mimir/Zard:

I pick them up and I I uh put them just on my shoulders. Uh and I'm like, sorry they're a little guy. Um should I make an animal handling and see if he chokes me out during me sleeping?

Wylie:

Yeah, sure. You you can put him on your shoulders and then if you want, maybe put a blanket over the both of you. Yeah. Because the snakes love heat, and he would probably love to just be all cozy and warm.

Mimir/Zard:

Do I get advantage from that? Oh good. Oh, it's the same thing. Animal handling. Everybody knows I'm good with animals. Seven.

Wylie:

Seven. It's okay. He wasn't hungry. So uh he he he goes on your shoulders, but he is cold still. And so he like tries to go down inside your shirt basically and really get close and warm on the biggest.

Mimir/Zard:

I'm gonna cut all that up. Why not? If I die today, it's you know, by a my little friend. How long is he? He's pretty big.

Wylie:

He's big. It's a big python, like um because I'm seven foot six. Yeah. Yeah. So I mean, compared to you, he's a little bit more like a ball python, which is a lot more, you know, usually something that a normal person can kind of hold in their hands a little bit better. So maybe just slightly bigger than that, but not like a massive anaconda, because you're such a big guy. So it's a pretty big snake, but you're a big guy.

Mimir/Zard:

I face him away from cobble just in case. It's hungry, he might disappear.

Wylie:

Tuck him right on in, you pat his little head and pull him down. Okay. And then um so at some point, say or so you probably stay up from Yeah, just for two hours. For two hours, go to sleep. And so then around 3 a.m., there's a ching, ching, ching, ching as the coin falls out of the candle. And does that wake up Morpheus? Do you want to roll?

Mimir/Zard:

I mean, well, I can roll if you want.

Wylie:

If you if you think that he would have a hard time waking up to that.

Brad/Morpheus:

Yeah, he would absolutely have a hard time waking up to that.

Mimir/Zard:

I wake up and I go, uh, hey, Mr. Morpheus, sir. Uh Mr. Swiftblade, um, Swiftblood. Um buddy. Oh yeah, well, hey, what's what's going on? What's going on? Oh, my bad, man. Yeah. I knew you were gonna wake up, that's why I woke up. Yeah, okay, yeah. I'll I'll I'll stay up and watch. Sure thing. No, no, no. I'll I'll I'll I'll be totally fine. Yeah, I got this. I got this. 100%. Awesome. If you have any troubles or anything, let me know, okay? Okay, yeah, yeah. Sure thing, man. I immediately fall asleep. I don't even like, I don't even sit in the chair. I'm like, oh, if you have any troubles, let me know. And then I just fall backwards onto the couch and I am passed out, unable to be woken up.

Wylie:

Does Morpheus stay sitting or does he get up or?

Brad/Morpheus:

No, he stays sitting. Uh the thing about this though is that this is probably one of the first times that Morpheus there there is something about this place and the people, but he just feels really at home and comfortable. And so he falls right back asleep.

Wylie:

Oh, immediately.

Brad/Morpheus:

Yeah. Okay. This is the most comfortable he's been that he can remember.

Wylie:

Okay. Alright, then everybody give me a disadvantaged perception check.

Mimir/Zard:

Oh boy. Okay, roll twice and take the lower. I think I rolled the lowest. Yep, I did. You roll again and take the lower one. Yeah. I don't think I can get any lower. Oh, man. Then I got the lower one.

Wylie:

You got a one?

Brad/Morpheus:

I got a nat one, yeah.

Wylie:

I mean, that one.

Mimir/Zard:

Sixteen.

Wylie:

Sixteen. What did Cobble get?

Kipo/Cobble:

Uh an eight.

Wylie:

An eight. Okay. So Zard, um, not too long. You know, you're still sleeping a little light because you've just woke up because of the coin. So not too long after um you tried to wake up Morpheus, you you wake up with kind of a start.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah.

Wylie:

And you hear loud voices outside, and it sounds kind of like rockious laughter, shouting, jeering. Um Are the blinds. The shutters are shut. Um you could probably try to go up to a window and try to peer through a crack if you wanted to.

Mimir/Zard:

Are they heading in our direction?

Wylie:

Um The 16 is not really it. Just sounds like there are people outside. It's it's with 16, it's not really high enough to tell exactly. Um it maybe sounds like they're walking like passing by. It doesn't maybe sound like they're immediately next to the house or not.

Kipo/Cobble:

2 30 a.m. Bars just closed.

Mimir/Zard:

Yep. Um I wake up swift leg and I go, hey buddy, hey there. Hey, oh, what's going on? It's your watch. Um, so sorry. You go back to sleep and you leave them into the old night. No, uh and I take some water and I throw it in your face. And I go, Oh, that's cold, man. Yep. That was cold. There you go. There you go. That's okay. Hey, remember we're safe now, but in the jungle, we weren't safe. So if we were sleeping outside, we could have all died because of you. Think about it. But we're not outside. Yeah, but do you hear that? Okay. Those people could come inside and then it would make it outside because they would come inside. So think about it that way. I'm gonna go to bed before you can talk.

Wylie:

I love this not intelligence but wisdom where he's like, that may's outside the inside.

Brad/Morpheus:

Exactly. Wait, so if you open up a door,

Mimir/Zard:

I'm asleep.

Brad/Morpheus:

Inside. No, I finished the question. It's like, so if I open up a door, does that make inside now outside? And then no answer. This time standing up. But doesn't it? Now, yeah, but now he's Morpheus stays awake just pondering that question that there's no answer to. And he starts going through, like, man, but if if a door is closed, inside is inside. But when it's open, is it outside?

Wylie:

Three.

Brad/Morpheus:

But what if I open two doors? Is it really outside? And a wind if I open all of the doors and window, is it?

Kipo/Cobble:

And I just throw a pebble at uh his head. I rolled a three.

Wylie:

So Morpheus is muddling, muttering to himself. That's waking up. So in darkness he throws. And um you don't hit Morpheus, but you hear something else skittering around now that you've thrown a pebble. So you disturbed some other animal. Oh my no, there's just a rock in your eye. The darkness. Um Morpheus, are you awake for the rest of the night?

Brad/Morpheus:

Uh probably. He'd probably feel bad for falling asleep, so he he would probably stay awake at this point now. Spawn got your sleep that you need to. You got your four hours, so technically you don't need sleep anymore. Technically.

Wylie:

Now he's just meditating on those things.

Brad/Morpheus:

Yeah, yeah, on those side, yeah, literally that question.

Wylie:

And so are you kind of more paying attention to things outside? Are you paying attention to things inside?

Mimir/Zard:

What's the difference, DM?

Brad/Morpheus:

Yeah, yeah. He's thinking about both. No, he's thinking about both, inside and outside.

Wylie:

Do you think you're really paying attention to stuff that's going on?

Brad/Morpheus:

Or I think he would notice some. I I don't think it would be like a like he's only listening, and you know, but he would probably be thinking on his thoughts, but still somewhat listening.

Wylie:

Mm-hmm. Okay. Um you notice that definitely that some of the animals are moving around at night, and chinchillas in particular are nocturnal. So the chinchilla is just like you you'll kind of just like think everything calms down, and then all of a sudden you'll hear his like and this little chinchilla is just hopping, and his little brushy tail is flickering around. And um definitely if you kind of just sit and stare and kind of let your eyes defocus, you kind of feel like the whole room almost is moving a little bit because of all the different geckos and lizards and snakes, many of which are nocturnal.

Brad/Morpheus:

So probably start watching that though. Um just kind of the at this point you'd be like, yeah, maybe inside is outside.

Wylie:

This is just reinforcing that concept. Yeah, yeah. And um, so as you're watching, you even because the there's the most light by the fire, you see that the snakes seem to be grouping in particular near the fire. And some of them are coming close to Cobble because he's the one that's closest to the fire and kind of snuggling up against Cobble in his sleep. Perfect. Do you do anything about that or you just leave it?

Brad/Morpheus:

Oh, absolutely leave it. Yeah.

Wylie:

They aren't they aren't the huge snakes. As you can see that there's a huge snake hanging out with Zard, and these are smaller, smaller snakes. So um they're just all starting to to group around Cobble in sort of a little nest in the middle of the night.

Brad/Morpheus:

Yeah, he would just leave that be.

Wylie:

Okay. And so finally there's a little bit of daylight peeking through the rafter the shutters, and you guys start to wake up. And so, Cobble, you awake surrounded by snakes. And Zard, you awake with a snake still tucked on in your sweater as you're sitting in the chair.

Mimir/Zard:

Oh, I low there, a little Guy.

Brad/Morpheus:

Oh, you stayed up. Yeah, yeah, I was I was awake this time. Hey, good job. Hey, high five, good job. Five. It's like, what the heck? Okay, alright. Sorry. I don't know how to deal with children. No friends. No young man.

Wylie:

Most of the time, kids like high fives.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, I thought they did.

Wylie:

Yeah, you don't know what you eat.

Brad/Morpheus:

You just pull he's like, Oh, would you like uh he just pulls out a butterscotch? Like, do you use this kind of candy you like?

Mimir/Zard:

I have a lollipop also, but I think that's for every age, to be honest with you.

Wylie:

Cool. And how does Cobble feel when he wakes up?

Kipo/Cobble:

Yeah, I'm trying to figure out if he's afraid of snakes or not. Uh has not roll for fear of snakes. Rocknome, no, he's not afraid of the snakes. Uh maybe a little bit jolted uh waking up and seeing all of these animals, but we also are just in a weird place. And we went to bed knowing that there are a bunch of animals around, so that makes sense to me. So uh just gonna wakes up, maybe like takes them off of him if they're on him, uh, tosses them to the side, uh, gets up, and then I think he would want more. Food at this point. So goes back to the table and looks for any le like any leftovers that are sitting around.

Wylie:

So imagine you he starts like licking his finger and like tapping it on the table trying to pick up any crumbs.

Kipo/Cobble:

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

Wylie:

Not like crumbs, but there's definitely like hanging sausages. Um and because the wife is a gnome, things are pretty accessible to things of your height. So you guys definitely find you can find some quick breakfast stuff if you want to help yourselves. Um but you do also start to hear stirring upstairs. So it sounds like they are also good enough for the day.

Mimir/Zard:

Can I cook a full meal? Sure. For everybody. Yeah. You want to cook up breakfast? Yeah, I'll cook up breakfast. Should they treat it as so nice? I feel like it would be great.

Wylie:

Yeah.

Mimir/Zard:

And then I'll I'll sli slide the paper and see if there's anything. I'll slide it to these guys.

Wylie:

Yeah, so you bring the paper out of your book and you would fold it.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah.

Wylie:

Okay. So as you unfold it, you see that the hole that you had pierced yesterday is gone.

Mimir/Zard:

I was so scared that we really messed up a lot of stuff. Can't believe that was our second action is to stab a piece of paper. Sorry, that was Morpheus' second action of just I was there. I was hoping it.

Wylie:

Your second inclination was to burn the paper. At least your second action to it.

Mimir/Zard:

So I burn it.

Wylie:

Tell me your secret. You're torturing the paper. Yeah. Give it an interrogation.

Mimir/Zard:

Is hello still on there? Or did it fully receive?

Wylie:

You wiped it off.

Mimir/Zard:

We wiped it off.

Wylie:

Oh, you wiped off "sup". Um the hello is not there anymore.

Kipo/Cobble:

Interesting. Okay. Start writing down every word you know.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, you should write the town name. Or I'll be like, have you tried like writing names? Maybe our names? Or something like that. I'm trying to think of like clues. But we just found this check. You make like a cooking check or something? Yeah. Like that's a sleight of hand or something.

Wylie:

Yeah, whatever you think makes the most sense with your character's stats that they would use for cooking.

Mimir/Zard:

Alright, performances. Yeah, performance is going to be a good thing.

Wylie:

Honestly, it makes sense for you know.

Mimir/Zard:

No, please. Intelligence. Intelligence, yeah.

Wylie:

Because if you're making a real show of breakfast.

Mimir/Zard:

Oh, always. Oh my gosh, that's so good. That's a 21.

Wylie:

What is a 21 worthy breakfast with a beautiful presentation?

Mimir/Zard:

Oh, it's like the the funny part is like the breakfast is very normal because the presentation, there's like candles and there's things like that, and there's like uh there's art that I hung up and things like that of like their family that I drew last night. And so I put that above the fireplace. And it's like Yeah, there you go. And then there's like candles lit and stuff like that, and it's like very homey feeling. Um, and I slide a bunch of plates, and then I have extra food too, uh, that they can like keep wherever they need to keep it um if they want to eat. Um and I'm I found the gnomish like baking like uh what what's that thing like? Apron? Yeah, apron. Oh nice. And I'm wearing it, it's just like so short. It's just like a bird over my like chest, just barely. Um, and the snake is like all all around me.

Wylie:

It's kind of like wrapped around your head, like halfway like a turban now.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, exactly. And it says kiss the cook on it. And I'm like, here we go. And I'm singing um as we do that. So that's what I'm doing in the morning.

Brad/Morpheus:

Morpheus is probably just uh honestly, you probably would have been playing with the chinchilla. Uh so fun. Yeah. And then honestly, probably just holding the chinchilla as it now starts to go to sleep.

Wylie:

Yeah, yeah, because it finally is kind of wearing down. So the early morning time is the best time because it's it's getting sleepy and stuff. And um, you find a little bowl in the corner with dust, just full of dust. And so it hops on in there and takes a little dust bath and rolls all around and it gets all dusty and it kind of hops on you and leaves a cute little tiny dust footprints and stuff, and then it just sort of snuggles up in your lap as you're just sitting there petting it and finally starts to mellow out.

Kipo/Cobble:

Can I do a history check on the paper to see if I've ever seen any paper like this or where it came comes from?

Wylie:

Sure, sure.

Mimir/Zard:

If that would be history.

Wylie:

Yeah.

Kipo/Cobble:

Okay. Not bad. Not bad. Yeah. That's a 15.

Wylie:

Okay. Um, so you don't think you've ever encountered this out in life in the wild, anything like that before? But you feel like this is something important for you guys to have. Like, cause similar to your equipment and gear, you feel like this was given to us with a purpose and it's related to our mission. But you can't remember, like, and as I mentioned last night, there's a word that will activate it.

Kipo/Cobble:

But how would I know that there's a word that will activate it?

Wylie:

So part of your arcana check was that this is like a password protected type of document. So that was the information that you were able to get with that arcana check and sensing this type of magic.

Kipo/Cobble:

But like a verbal spoken word?

Wylie:

Mm-hmm.

Mimir/Zard:

Okay.

Wylie:

Yeah.

Mimir/Zard:

Cobble just starts ranting through the dictionary of uh common. What is it well that's supposed

Kipo/Cobble:

and that's what I was trying to figure out is like what if is it elvish or is it another language?

Mimir/Zard:

Say words in different languages as we're walking maybe through.

Kipo/Cobble:

Okay. I mean, that's not a bad idea. Eventually you're gonna hit a word. So I don't know.

Wylie:

Do a cobble start whispering random words to the paper or

Mimir/Zard:

I'd say we try common first, right?

Kipo/Cobble:

Yeah. Do you want me to actually come up with a list of words?

Wylie:

Yeah, you don't have to, but if you just think of something you would want to try, like a password.

Kipo/Cobble:

Well, it would just be like uh more like honestly, I wouldn't even give it to Zard because he tells stories. Oh, that's so smart. And then as naturally I'm gonna be able to do that. So you can actually read that maybe one of the words that he says unlocks it. So that's my I like that. I like that.

Wylie:

But also if you think if you think Cobble would just like try to think and think of whatever word cabble would try out.

Kipo/Cobble:

What word? Like I have no idea what word is.

Wylie:

But just what word would copy trying? Yeah, like pebbles.

Kipo/Cobble:

Or what word was Well, I've already said rocks before out loud.

Mimir/Zard:

Does it have to be like directed at it? Yeah, does it have to be open or no?

Wylie:

Okay.

Mimir/Zard:

Say pebbles at the paper. Just start speaking.

Kipo/Cobble:

So we'll I'll just keep it open on the table while we're eating and as we start saying words to it.

Wylie:

Okay. You will have to tell me a word that you try, otherwise I won't be able to confirm it. But that's okay.

Mimir/Zard:

We can as we are casually talking, DM, we have it open.

Wylie:

You have it open.

Kipo/Cobble:

So any words that we have that we say right now moving forward. Yes, yes.

Wylie:

Any words.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, any words that we say moving forward from this.

Kipo/Cobble:

And the family. Because they're gonna talk too. Yeah, that's true. So Morpheus is just like Baba Boo, Baba Bui.

Wylie:

Morpheus is really into it. Yeah.

Mimir/Zard:

He's like, I'm gonna figure this out. Hey, speaking your do you have any like Elvish words that you really like? Yeah. Just send it. Just start sending words, man. So I'm pretty sure. I'm just kidding. Mor Morpheus definitely knows Elvish, but Brad does not. So maybe it could be a password that we set knowing that we were gonna lose our memories, and so it would be what word would we say? Well, I would say like rock, paper, scissors would be my because that's kind of like our thing, right? And we naturally came up with that. So rock, paper, scissors. I say it in st uh giant rock brias. Um I'm guessing it doesn't work.

Wylie:

Okay, so you say it directly to the paper.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah.

Wylie:

And there seems to be like a like a little ripple or like a little fizzle, but nothing happens.

Mimir/Zard:

Pebbles. Rock.

Wylie:

So as you're seeing random words, the family comes downstairs and um Sheila is because look at this lovely breakfast.

Mimir/Zard:

Okay, just real quick, I just we're gonna be saying words at this piece of paper. And I just don't want you to think we're insane. But if everything that you say, could you just face this piece of paper as you say it?

Wylie:

She she kind of gives you a look and she goes, It's magic. What a beautiful breakfast.

Mimir/Zard:

What a beautiful breakfast. Nah. Fire. Um curse. Uh dead.

Wylie/Sheila:

Did you sleep well?

Mimir/Zard:

Uh yeah, we slept really well. Sleeping.

Wylie/Sheila:

I see that you've gotten really comfortable with our friends here.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah. We also I made you breakfast and I made you some art.

Wylie/Sheila:

Oh.

Mimir/Zard:

Oh, you're a fair boy.

Wylie/Sheila:

Beautiful.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah. Beautiful. I want to see the life. I want to see the life. Beautiful life. I'm just going to start reading my book at it. Yeah. And so I uh I'll just start saying words if you want me to, DM as it I'll just make up a story.

Wylie:

The the family's coming down now. So you maybe want to you might want to pack it up and move on at this point.

Mimir/Zard:

I mean we'll keep it out and we'll just keep it.

Wylie:

You keep it out while you're having breakfast. So you guys all have breakfast with the family together.

Mimir/Zard:

And the paper.

Wylie:

And the paper sits out.

Mimir/Zard:

You just wanted food. Food. Water.

Wylie:

And so I assume you made kind of like sausages and eggs and some toast, because that was the sort of basic stuff that was available in the kitchen, but you maybe um put some like dried rosemary.

Mimir/Zard:

Oh no, nothing special. Just the presenting is really fancy. Nothing special about the meal at all.

Wylie:

It's good. It's like food part. You know, just simple food is good.

Kipo/Cobble:

Yeah. So it's just raw eggs spread on bread. No. No.

Wylie:

raw crunchy, eggs and eggshells.

Mimir/Zard:

I have a name in my brain. Dr. Fizzard. Look at the paper. I'm just gonna The paper. The paper comes alive.

Wylie/Bruce:

The paper turns into blue gas. No, the paper is still there. So you guys are enjoying this breakfast together with the family. And um Bruce says, "So, have you thinking a bit about getting those eggs for us?"

Mimir/Zard:

Oh, yeah. We love dinosaur eggs. Um, and we would love to help.

Wylie/Bruce:

To be clear, we want to raise it.

Mimir/Zard:

Oh, you want to raise it? Yeah.

Wylie/Bruce:

Yeah, we're not gonna eat it.

Mimir/Zard:

No, yeah, obviously.

Wylie/Bruce:

Nobody would eat dinosaur eggs.

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah, that would be really, really bad for the dinosaur eggs.

Brad/Morpheus:

Morpheus is just staring off in the distance, but with wide eyes, like, oh yeah.

Mimir/Zard:

Because that's somebody's kids.

Wylie/Bruce:

Yeah, because of course dinosaur eggs are fertilized.

Mimir/Zard:

Born from the eggs again. And this is hard.

Kipo/Cobble:

C obble is ready to go back into the woods, find more rocks.

Wylie:

Yeah, he's about it.

Mimir/Zard:

Would you like to would you like cobble? Cobble, flint whistle, flint whistle, Zardmithon. Morpheus with blood. Morpheus is just like, why are we saying our names now? It's a paper, Morpheus. Oh, suck. Sorry. Uh yeah, we can go get that.

Wylie/Bruce:

Um Would you like me to give you a map to the flying dinosaurs? Cliffs, or would you or would you like to return to the uh he gives you to the uh the ones you found in the woods before?

Mimir/Zard:

Uh no, I think new new dinosaur eggs would be fun. Yeah, flying dinosaurs.

Wylie/Bruce:

The cliff is a bit challenging, that's why we haven't gotten them so far.

Mimir/Zard:

Well, we're we're strapping young lads.

Wylie/Bruce:

I believe you're more than capable.

Brad/Morpheus:

Yeah, thank you. I appreciate that. Thank you for believing in us. We believe this is hard. All right, you were gonna set a password.

Wylie/Bruce:

My password?

Mimir/Zard:

Yeah.

Wylie/Bruce:

Oh, it would be Crikey.

Mimir/Zard:

Crikey. Password. Password one. Exclamation mark. Um, all right. All capital. Um, sorry. Uh yeah, yeah, we'll uh we'll head to there. We'll be like, yeah, thank you so much for the map.

Wylie/Bruce:

Great. Sheila pack you up a bit of food for your journey.

Mimir/Zard:

Ah, we appreciate that. We love food and other things.

Wylie/Bruce:

All right, I'm gonna unlock the uh mudroom for you. We've got to get taken care of some of the animals, get them their breakfast as well. And uh make sure you leave that guy behind. And he points to the snake that's around around you.

Mimir/Zard:

What's this guy's name?

Wylie/Bruce:

Oh, that one. He's my favorite. Yeah.

Mimir/Zard:

Favorite.

Wylie/Bruce:

I'll name that one Steve O.

Mimir/Zard:

Steve O! All right, come on, Steve O. I wrap him, he's been wrapping around my neck, so I wrap him like three or four times. Uh and I'm like, all right, Steve O. Looking at the paper. No, I don't. Um cool. Well, uh, story. Backstory. All right. I fold up the paper and I'm like, we tried our hardest. It worked like an above book. All right.

Wylie:

You guys are making good progress. That's good. I've gotten a lot of lore.

Mimir/Zard:

That's great. All right.

Wylie:

All right. So you guys gear up, grab your stuff, you put some sandwiches in your pack, you fill up your water jugs with some good fresh water. They have a nice pump at their sink. So they have fresh water right into the house. You can see that they're really well prepared for like maybe not being able to leave the house for a couple days. Because, you know, even though in the morning they, you know, opened up some skylights, let some light in and stuff, as they're as you're preparing to get outside, you remember just how fortified this house is. And while this house was a really nice, cozy, safe oasis, you're really reminded of the dangers and terrors that wait outside, the few that you've seen already, and some unknown terrors that may await you. So with that, you guys gear on up and head out to the door. And we'll find out if you guys find those dinosaurs eggs in our next episode.